5 Sneaky, Science-Backed Ways To Make Your Date Fall For You
(Image: Eyecharts / Etsy)
At one point or another, we’ve all had to plan key details of a date. From the location to the menu, your outfit to your actions, there are a lot of variables involved in setting the stage for love. And as it turns out, research shows playing with the elements of a date can actually up the levels of romance and attraction between you and your partner. From a psychological standpoint, we simply associate certain conditions with that lovin’ feeling.
Of course, ultimately, you want your date to fall for you, but a little help from Cupid’s bow (aka scientifically based attraction) never hurt anyone. Here are a few interesting hints to use on your next date; employ at your own risk.
1. Order dessert.
You may not want to call her “sweetie” on a first date, but do order something sweet off the menu. A 2014 study from Purdue University had 280 people imagine a would-be partner through researcher description. One group sipped on water as a control, while the others downed a sweet solution. The result? More people were interested in dating this hypothetical match after sipping the sugary beverage and expected a greater level of intimacy with the theoretical person. Sure enough, the researchers also did an experiment with cookies to similar effect. The scientists think the brain may associate romantic thoughts with sweet taste, which is why they saw a spike in romantic thoughts after sugar consumption. However, note that this trick only seemed to work while participants were thinking of a hypothetical relationship, not a pre-existing one, so employ this trick early in the courtship phase.
2. Wear red.
Red really is the color of love and romance, according to a 2008 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. In a series of experiments framing photos of women in different colors and saturations from red to white, blue to green, researchers asked men questions like, “How pretty do you think this person is?” or “Imagine you are going on a date with this person and have $100 in your wallet. How much would you be willing to spend on your date?” Under all conditions, women were rated significantly more desirable while wearing red or framed by the scarlet hue as opposed to any other color.
3. Don’t gush (yet).
It’s pretty common to shower your date with compliments. However, according to a classic 1965 study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, you may want to hold back some of that praise early on. Researchers not so accidentally allowed college-aged study participants to overhear descriptions of them in one of four ways: all positive; all negative; initially positive, before becoming negative; or initially negative, before becoming positive. While the subjects liked the experimenters who exclusively sang praises, they were even more fond of the experimenters who evaluated them negatively first and then positively — so you may want to play your affection close to the chest at first and let your sweet nothings grow with time.
4. Get physical.
No, no. Not like that! Just try planning an active, novel date instead of standard dinner date. A study from researchers at McKendree University in Illinois had 70 college-aged subjects check out photos of the opposite sex roughly 15 minutes after engaging in a physical activity, like playing a sport or working out at the gym. They found that the adrenaline spike increased the participants’ attraction to the men and women in the photos when compared to those who hadn’t just got their bodies moving and heart rates pumping. So whether you want your date to fall for you for the first time, or want to relight the flame of attraction with your spouse, it’s better to go skiing or hit the amusement park than catch a movie.
5. Let the music play.
Everything seems more romantic set to the perfect soundtrack, and science now confirms it. A 2015 Japanese study gathered up young men and women for a speed-dating-like study. The researchers assembled eight groups of two guys and two gals each. For half the participants, background music played during their 20-minute conversations; for the other half, no music played at all. While simply chatting to face-to-face improved impressions considerably, the participants noted higher levels of intimacy and attraction in the conversations set to songs. Time to plan more dates at music festivals, and choose an atmospheric location the next time you grab drinks with a potential partner.
