'New York Times' Polling Shows Women Named Karen Prefer Biden, Dicks Prefer Trump

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Because surely this is what everyone is worried about, newly released polling from the New York Times and Sienna College breaks down presidential candidate preferences based on the first names of likely voters.

The findings are pulled from polls conducted over the past two months in key 2020 states. In addition to a breakdown focused on the 10 "most common" male and female names among likely voters from the polls' resulting database, the Times has also made available a searchable table comprised of 102 names for which the poll conductors had "at least" 30 respondents.

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Among the name-centered highlights tailor-made for headlines are that women named Karen were shown in the polls of more than 17,000 voters in 18 states to prefer Biden (60 percent) over Trump (40 percent), men named Richard (i.e. the Dicks) prefer Trump (64 percent) over Biden (36 percent), and Donalds overwhelmingly prefer the failed steak salesman of the same name.

The lead-up to (and eventual results of ) the 2016 election between Trump and Hillary Clinton, however, should have taught the general public a thing or three about trusting polls as makeshift gospel.

Ahead of Tuesday's election, Trump suggested to a crowd of virus-ignoring supporters in Florida that he would attempt to have Dr. Anthony Fauci fired shortly after. Trump, however, does not technically have the power to directly fire Fauci.

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