New York Animal Shelter Seeking Forever Home for 'Fire-Breathing Demon' Dog Called 'Ralphie'

Phil Boucher
·3 min read
92

Ralphie the rescue dog is looking for a forever home — but you may want to protect your ankles (and property) first.

On Jan. 17 the New York-based nonprofit Niagara County SPCA posted a brutally honest Facebook post about Ralphie, who they described as "fire-breathing" and "a whole jerk- not even half."

"Sometimes we can sugarcoat the less than desirable traits," the shelter added about their ability to write persuasive adoption posts about the animals in their care. "This one stumps us though. We don't actually have too many nice things to say so we're just going to come out with it.

"Meet Ralphie. At first glance, he's an adorable highly sought after, young dog. People should be banging down our doors for him. We promise you, that won't be the case. Ralphie is a terror in a somewhat small package."

"What could go wrong with a 26lb dog, right?" added the SPCA. "We're sure you're thinking: my ankles will be just fine. We'd caution- proceed at your own risk."

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Meet Ralphie. At first glance, he's an adorable highly sought after, young dog. People should be banging down our doors for him. We promise you, that won't be the case.
Meet Ralphie. At first glance, he's an adorable highly sought after, young dog. People should be banging down our doors for him. We promise you, that won't be the case.

Niagara SPCA Facebook

The shelter's "best guess" is that Ralphie's learned his riotous ways from using his cute looks to get whatever he wanted from his first owner — and has kept this up ever since.

"His first owners took him to board and train, but their relationship was built on the premise that Ralphie was the boss so things ended abruptly," said the SPCA. "He was rehomed. Two weeks into this new home and he was surrendered to us because "annoys our older dog".

"What they actually meant was: Ralphie is a fire-breathing demon and will eat our dog, but hey, he's only 26lbs."

"He's a whole jerk- not even half," added the SPCA. "Everything belongs to him. If you dare test his ability to possess THE things, wrath will ensue. If you show a moment of weakness, prepare to be exploited. Sounds fun, huh?"

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According to the SPCA, the ideal owner for Ralphie is "the Mother of Dragons", played by Emilia Clarke in Game of Thrones. Failing that, they suggest he's best suited to an adult home free of other animals, and an experienced owner who will treat him calmly yet sternly.

Or, as they put it on Facebook: someone who will put up "with zero c---."

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"On the bright side, Ralphie's previous trainer will provide his new adopters with the training tools they believe he needs to be successful in a home," added the SPCA, before stressing that they were only interested in receiving serious inquiries.

"No, we will not make exceptions," they continued, before adding tongue-in-cheek "No takesy backsies (kidding, obviously). Give us a call at 716-731-4368 ext 301 if you're that crazy."

Ralphie was still available for adoption as of Friday, reported CNN.