'The View': Whoopi Talks About Her Vibrator, Joy Behar's Plea to Gay Priests

  • Oops!
    Something went wrong.
    Please try again later.
  • Oops!
    Something went wrong.
    Please try again later.
  • Oops!
    Something went wrong.
    Please try again later.
·Critic-at-Large, Yahoo Entertainment
In this article:
  • Oops!
    Something went wrong.
    Please try again later.
  • Oops!
    Something went wrong.
    Please try again later.
  • Oops!
    Something went wrong.
    Please try again later.
image

The View returned for its 19th season on Monday morning with an air of desperation and Joy Behar. The hyped-up show, fighting its sinking ratings, brought back Behar to an already-crowded table that included new panelists Paula Faris and Candace Cameron Bure. The hallowed “Hot Topics” segment received a new graphic meant to resemble a sizzling branding-iron, at which even Whoopi Goldberg and Behar snickered in ridicule.

The women spent two segments talking over each other about jailed Kentucky clerk Kim Davis in a frantic attempt to land a few argument-provoking blows. Instead, we got Michelle Collins referring to the clerk as “a monster” and asserting that “my dream is that she stays in jail long enough to get gay-married.” To which Behar responded, “My dream is that all the gay priests come out of the closet.” Wha-wha-whaaat?

Talk somehow turned to the British TV show The Fall, with Behar saying Gillian Anderson is so hot in it, she’d “turn you lesbian,” and the new panelists lusted over Fall co-star Jamie Dornan. The 59-year-old Goldberg, however, said she “can’t get excited over all these little boys — it’s creepy.” Dismissing the 30-something Dornan, Goldberg cited a more age-appropriate companion: the “little friend in my drawer” that keeps her happy.

Startled that The View had begun the season talking about Whoopi’s vibrator, Cameron Bure held her head as though it was about to explode and said, “Did we just go there?” Oh, indeed you did, kid. Welcome to a View that can’t keep anything tucked away in a discreet drawer.

By the time the hour featured “The Political View” segment with Sen. Elizabeth Warren, Behar was nearly jumping out of her seat trying to get Warren to spill a news-making View-scoop about Joe Biden’s potential presidential run, with Warren as a running-mate. The unflappable Warren remained demurely on-point, saying, “Look, this isn’t about me.”

Clearly, Warren would never make a good View co-host, each of whom thinks it’s all about her.

The View airs weekdays at 11 a.m. on ABC.