Tess Holliday Is 'Really Struggling' with Her Body Image: 'It's Been Almost Debilitating'

Sarah Morris/Getty Tess Holliday

Tess Holliday is working on repairing her relationship with her body after she was diagnosed with anorexia, but lately, she's been "really struggling."

The 36-year-old model and body activist shared last May that she was diagnosed with anorexia, a diagnosis that she said she was as shocked to receive. In the months since, Holliday has shared the ups and downs of her eating disorder, and how on one day she can be trying new foods that she used to avoid, like Big Macs, while on other days she has trouble allowing herself to eat.

And in recent weeks, Holliday hasn't been managing well, she said on Thursday.

"I'm gonna be honest, I've been really struggling with body image in a way I've never experienced," she shared with her followers on Instagram. "It's been almost debilitating because even though y'all see me out having fun, it sometimes takes so much work and energy just to be able to leave the house."

The mom of two shared a carousel of pictures from an Easter weekend trip along the California coast with her family, and said that these were the first photos she's actually wanted to share.

"I'm the kind of gal that always wants my photo taken, until lately… and these are some of the first photos I've taken in a while where I saw myself in them and was kind," she said. "(I'm working on it.)"

"Soaking up this family time & feeling grateful, even when it's tough 💕✨," she added.

Holliday said in March that the pandemic helped her examine her relationship with food.

"During the pandemic, it caused me to slow down — like it did most of us — and I started really examining how I was feeding my body or the lack thereof," she said during an appearance on Tamron Hall.

RELATED: Eating Disorder Expert Says Anorexia Can Affect All Body Sizes: It 'Doesn't Have One Look'

Holliday started working with a dietitian, expecting to hear that she was overeating or binge eating, only to learn that she was doing the opposite, and restricting herself in a way that led to her anorexia diagnosis.

"I was sitting on the kitchen counter and I remember her saying it and I just laughed," she said. "I went, 'No, look at me — I'm fat.' "

RELATED VIDEO: Tess Holliday Had the Perfect Response to a Woman Who Body Shamed Her in a Waiting Room

Holliday pointed out that anorexia does not have one look, and if she knew that larger bodies could also have the eating disorder she may have been diagnosed sooner.

"I just was flooded with all kinds of feelings," she said. "If I would have known that this was a possibility, I could have gotten help sooner. If there wasn't so much weight-bias stigma in the medical industry, someone could have helped me before I got to his point."

If you or someone you know is battling an eating disorder, please contact the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) at 1-800-931-2237 or go to NationalEatingDisorders.org.