“Survivor 46” cast reveal their most embarrassing moments ever

"I thought my farts didn't smell," explains one player.

Every season of Survivor, we here at Entertainment Weekly put frivolity aside and get down to real journalism — namely, forcing each player from the current season to regale us with stories looking back at the most humiliating and mortifying moments from their entire lives. It’s difficult work, but it is a commitment we made to Survivor Nation long ago, and it is a commitment we don’t take lightly.

But even we were caught completely unprepared for what the cast of Survivor 46 (which airs Wednesdays on CBS) served up on the proverbial table when we asked them to share their most embarrassing stories ever. We want to tease what some of those stories are, but also don’t want to ruin the surprise waiting below for any of you. Suffice it to say that Jem Hussain-Adams, Maria Shrime Gonzalez, Bhanu Gopal, Charlie Davis, and Liz Wilcox are all immediately vying to secure their spot in the Survivor Embarrassing Moments Hall of Fame, Hell, pretty much the entire cast came to play. Don’t believe us? Watch the video below, or read all the entries for yourself. WARNING: You will never look at these people the same.

Tevin Davis

When I was in kindergarten, we were playing around, and I had to pee really bad and my bladder was full. And so we had this one little bathroom in our classroom, and this boy Caleb was in there and I didn't see him come out at all. I'm on my little duty cleaning the tables and stuff, and I'm like, “Caleb’s sure taking a long time in the bathroom. I mean, I need to go.” And so time had elapsed and I absolutely peed on myself in that moment. It was the most humiliating thing I've ever done in my whole life, and it just went everywhere. You could just see the ring of pee slowly spanning out as a classroom of kindergartners made fun of me. I never forgot that moment. It's so embarrassing.

Tim Spicer

I was on desk duty at Morehouse College in my dorm and I was signing people in. I'm working on my MacBook and people come in and out of the dorm all the time. I'm studying, and unbeknownst to me, somebody walks in and snatches my MacBook off the desk and sprints out. And I was so in shock that I ran to the door too late and they got away. It was a local, but it was so embarrassing having to call home and tell that story, and then even telling guys on that floor like, “Bro, somebody just stole my laptop.” “What do you mean somebody just stole your laptop and ran away?” So I felt completely dumb. I felt weak. Like, you're a young man, you should be able to catch this guy.

Soda Thompson

We used to have this really old rickety deck in my backyard. And my brother's bike was on it, and I decided to build a makeshift ramp with one plank off of the deck and ride the bike down the deck. And as soon as I went onto the makeshift ramp, it fell and I flipped over. The handlebars stabbed me so hard in the gut. Everybody was laughing at me and I was crying-laughing. I was in the between because I knew it was funny, and I didn't want people to know that I was hurt. So I was crying-laughing. But to this day it is something I'm constantly reminded of.

Bhanu Gopal

I was living with my mom in Bombay and I went to Hyderabad to attend a friend's wedding. At that time, I had no place to stay, so I called up one of my friends who's working at one of the nightclubs. He told me to come to the nightclub so we can go to his place once he's done with his shift. Because I had a long journey, a train ride for almost 24 hours, I thought: I'm going to use the men's restroom.

And little did I know back then that the men's restroom is only to do number one and number two. But I also showered in the restroom and the people working in the nightclub complained to the manager, who then yelled at my friend. And my friend was so embarrassed, like, “Bhanu, how can you freaking shower in the restroom?” I didn't know. I thought restrooms are meant to shower. I didn't see a shower there, so I took the hose. And in India bathrooms, you have the hose to clean after you're done with your business. So I used that to clean myself. There was water everywhere. The most freaking embarrassing moment in my life. Still now, it makes me laugh when I think about it.

Venus Vafa

I remember one day I woke up, I felt so confident I wore a cute little outfit. I was strutting down the street feeling myself. It wasn't until a couple of blocks into my walk that a man came and he tapped me on my shoulder, and I scoffed. I'm like: “What does this man want from me? God, can a woman just walk alone in the streets?” And he stopped me to inform me that my dress was tucked into my underwear and I had been walking for blocks with my underwear out and my ass showing for the world for free.

David Jelinsky

When I was 11 years old, I was a Nevada ballet theater scholar. I did ballet and I was one of the only guys in my class, so I had to pick a girl up. And I wasn't this big when I was 11 years old. I was this scrawny, though, so I had to pick someone up and flip her around. She did no work — I'm sorry if you're watching this. But she dropped straight on her head. It was an entire class of girls. Everybody was looking at me. The instructor was Russian. It was a middle-aged Russian woman, short hair. She told me to get out. I was petrified, horrified. I pooped my pants. It was horrible.

Maria Shrime Gonzalez

Until I was well into my adult years, I thought my farts didn't smell. I could never smell farts. And so I would go through the stores and just pass gas, and I'm thinking nobody could smell it. It wasn't until my husband's like, “Dude, what is that?" I was like, "You can smell that?”

Jem Hussain-Adams

[Laughing hysterically] I was probably 22, and it's the first time I wore a tampon, and I did not take the barrel out. I stuck it up, and I've been walking, and I was like, "This feels weird." So I went back to the restroom and then the person next to me was like, “Hey.” I was like, “I don’t know if I'm wearing this right.” And the person was like, “Oh, okay. I'll give you another one and I'll guide you through it.” So she told me I had to take the barrel out. I was mortified because this was at work. So it's disgusting and embarrassing at the same time.

Moriah Gaynor

You see, I have a very subtle scar here. [Points to chin] And that happened because I was ice skating. And not just any ice skating. I was ice skating on a first date in high school with a guy who thought, "Let's take the klutz on ice. Why not?" So we're going around the rink and I go flat. I come up, and I'm like, “No, no, no, no, no. Keep going. Keep going.” We make it two more laps until someone else taps me and says, “Excuse me, ma'am, you're dripping blood on the ice. You need to leave.”

So I go to the bathroom, slap on a Band-Aid, and of course, we're in 10th grade, so I have to call my dad. He looked at it and said [to my date], “You're going home. You, missy? ER.” And I left my date to go get stitches from a wonderful excursion. We did have a second date. Young romance is a wild thing. Never know where it's going to go.

Jess Chong

So my senior year of college, I took this half-credit dance class, and I guess I was in the class and doing one of the choreographies, and underwear rolls out of my pants — like, dirty underwear. And at first I was like, “What the f--- is that?” I was like, “Oh my God, that's mine!” And I picked it up. I think a couple of other people saw it, but it was just really funny. I think the more embarrassing thing was that I'm really bad at following choreography.

Hunter McKnight

So one time I had an opportunity to do a presentation, and I was sick the weekend before that I was supposed to give it. And so you know how you get brain fog whenever you're a little bit sick? And so I said, “I'll make a PowerPoint because anybody can follow a PowerPoint.” I was typing out this PowerPoint so that even if I was sick, I'd be able to get through it. And so I get up to do the presentation — still kind of brain fog — I'm going through the presentation, and a word pops up on the screen that I have typed out in all caps. And I look at that word and I said [to myself], “I misspelled that word.” And so I was like, “Oh, let me crack a joke about it.”

And so I purposefully mispronounce this word, being funny and kind of laughed about it. To my horror, I then looked back down and realized I had spelled the word correctly, and it looked like I couldn't even say my own word that I put on the presentation. And because I was just so out of it, I just flipped to the next slide. And I know the audience had to have been like, “What is up with this guy? What is he even saying?’ It's weird combination of me mispronouncing words, getting weirdly silent, and then moving on. I still look back and it's traumatizing. [ED NOTE: The word was Israelite.]

Charlie Davis

I was out for a run, and I had to use the bathroom. It was just me walking into the woods, and I took care of my business. And I grabbed for what one uses to tidy oneself when in nature, which was a leaf. Little did I know that said leaf was a poison ivy leaf. And that's embarrassing in its own right, just terrible. But then when I went to the doctor with my mom, she made me tell this poor nurse exactly how I got poison ivy. The nurse was bringing me the steroids and my mom keeps going, “Tell her how it happened. Tell her!”… until I finally told her, half mumbling, what happened. And this poor nurse is held hostage by this disgusting story.

Q Burdette

I'm going out to speak to a real estate crowd, and I'm walking, I have my cool little vibe walk with me, and I'm checking myself out. And I trip over the cord in front of about 2,500 agents that are there to hear me speak. Here I go, tumbling. I tore down the mic that was trailing me in the back. That was pretty embarrassing on my part. But I'm the type of guy that turns something like that into a positive. I jump up, I laugh, they laugh, and the show goes on like nothing happened. But in that moment, if I was white, my face probably would've been red.

Tiffany Nicole Ervin

I was in high school, and I used to run cross country. One race, I was really, really dehydrated. It was so hot, I passed out five feet from the finish line from dehydration. The next race, my coach was so worried that I was going to pass out that she was pumping me full of water the entire day, and it ended up being like a rainy ass cold day, so I didn't even need all that.

We're at the starting line. I have to go to the bathroom real bad. I'm like, “Coach, I got to go to the bathroom.” She's like, “Finish the race. The faster you run, the faster you can go to the bathroom." Baby, that was a lie. By the time that race was finished, I peed my pants so bad. And I had on navy blue spandex. You could see the pee mark all the way from my ankles, a big round pee spot up to my waist. And it was an away match so everybody saw me crossing the finish line, pee everywhere. Super embarrassing, but it makes a good story to tell.

Liz Wilcox

I'm a runner, and I was going to run a half marathon. The night before, they say “Carb up!” And so I ate hot buffalo chicken pizza. And I remember reading the race rules and they said at mile seven, there's going to be an outhouse. So around mile four, I said, “Okay, I've got three miles. That's less than a half an hour. We're good to go. Just keep going. 25 minutes, 22 minutes,  20 minutes…." Well, I got to zero minutes, and I said, “Where's the outhouse?” They said, “Oh, it didn't come. There's not one until the end.” And I really, really had to go. And I am like, “Okay, body. 45 minutes, 40 minutes…." And at about 30 minutes, my body said, “Sister, you better go now, or I'll go for you.”

And I was in Massachusetts, it was New Year's Day, so it was a gigantic race. And I had to just go. I thought about knocking on houses, but then the houses started getting sparse, and it's New Year’s. I don't want to wake somebody up at 8:00 AM to take a dump. I just went on the side. There was nowhere. It was just a valley. There was nowhere to go. I just plucked right down.

This is very embarrassing for me because I actually don't like talking about going to the bathroom. I'm not Yam Yam “Poop in the ocean!” I don't even want to go. I begged them, “Do I have to go take an aqua dump? That's disgusting. I don't want to do it.” It was so embarrassing. And there were people! They could see me, they were waving, they were laughing. I had to wipe my butt with snow. Luckily, it was cold because of the hot buffalo. So that was the only saving grace. #RunnersUnite.

Ben Katzman

You know when you build up a moment in your head, and the moment comes and you're all hyped? I had thrown this crazy pool party at this motel in Miami, the cancer season pool party. And it was like an old-school, '60s hotel. And the rafters were packed. And I was set up by the pool. My band was playing, and the whole day, I'm like: During my song “Florida Man,” I'm going to crowd surf from the stage into the pool. And finally, the moment comes, and the ego's riding high, and I'm feeling it… and nobody moved the floaties out of the way. So as I'm finally rollin’ off, I land face first on this giant floaty, and it was the most anticlimactic thing. And you saw everybody go like, “YEEEAAAHHH, ooooookay, I think we need to do that again.”

Randen Montalvo

So I live in Florida. Me and my son watch a show called Bluey, right? It's about three dogs. The show is Australian. They all say “Hello” [in an Australian accent]. So me and my family, we say “Hello” [in an Australian accent] in the morning. We think nothing of it. So yesterday, I had an interaction. I forgot that I'm near Australia, and I've never met an Australian person ever. I approached somebody that was having me do a test for them and I said, “Hello” [in Bluey accent].

I don't know why I said that. It's like the dumbest thing. I'm 40 years old. Why am I saying that? Well, I miss my son. And the guy just said all, “Hey, how are you doing, sir?” And he had the full proper accent. He was an Australian. Do you know how low and dumb I fell at that point? I'm a computer science major. I wanted to profusely apologize. He was a very good sport about it. But I was flush red.

Kenzie Petty

I was 10 years old. You're at that weird transition pre-teenager where you want to hang out with the teenagers, but none of them really want you around. That's where I'm at. Okay. I'm awkward, I'm weird, but I want to be grown. So I was camping. I was at a KOA, and they have a kids youth center, and they were doing karaoke. And I didn't know what karaoke was because I was sheltered. And all the teenagers were like, “Do you want to come to karaoke with us?” And I was like, “This is my dream. Yes, I do.” So I put on my sparkly lip gloss. I'm ready for whatever karaoke is because I've been a yes, man since I came out of the womb, right? No idea what it is.

So we get there, and there's the TV and everybody's picking their songs, and I didn't know what was going on.  So I picked “Genie in a Bottle” by Christina Aguilera because I liked genies. I wasn't allowed to listen to Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera because they were too sexual, so I had no idea what was going on. I thought I was going to get a genie toy or watch a genie commercial. I didn't know. And I was the first one to go up there and I had to say the words, no melody, nothing to all of a “Genie in a Bottle” at 10 years old in front of everyone. And no one helped me. So I was just like, “Baby, rub me the right way. Ooh.” And I can't get over it. I still don't sing karaoke because it was mortifying.

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