Soldier Kink Sweeps Ukraine: Messages Surge When We’re Kicking Putin’s Butt

Ukrainian soldiers did not expect to be fighting off the attention of women when they signed up to battle President Vladimir Putin’s unprovoked attack. But when Russia launched its full-scale invasion of Ukraine 16 months ago, they found themselves cast into stardom for their work defending the homeland from their longtime oppressor.

For some women, support for the troops has transcended raising funds and volunteering. They also send flirty text messages and unsolicited nude pictures to soldiers they have never met on social media. The newfound fetishization of the Armed Forces of Ukraine has largely come as a welcome stress relief from the realities of war, allowing soldiers to escape for a few moments by speaking to women who are cheering them on.

For a few others, the deluge of sexual attention is a bit too much

“It’s easier for me to politely answer that I have a girlfriend and delete,” said Vadim, a 24-year-old soldier stationed in the western Lviv region, who tries to make sure his partner doesn’t see the messages. “Why would I tell my loved one that someone is writing to me to date me?”

The new-found popularity of soldiers has surprised Dmitriy, who was at his home in Enerhodar, in the Zaporizhzhia region of Ukraine, when Russia launched its full-scale invasion on Feb. 24, 2022. He declined to give his last name due to privacy concerns but said when the war began, he was 25 and had just completed his six-year career in Ukraine’s military. But as Russia attacked Ukraine from every side, Dmitriy grabbed his military gear and headed to the nearest recruitment center to re-enlist.

As a seasoned member of Ukraine’s military, Dmitriy had trained for a potential escalation in the conflict with Russia that had been going on in the eastern Donbas region for the last nine years. He was accustomed to life on the front lines, where every day was filled with violence and the deafening sounds of war. He was not prepared for the social media celebrity that was to follow.

One week into the war, Dmitriy was deployed to Kherson, where he would defend Ukraine’s southern front.

Russia’s army was twice the size of Ukraine’s, and Putin planned to have captured Kyiv in just days. The country’s future hung in the balance.

The tireless efforts of Ukraine’s military to fight off the Russians have spawned a huge sense of pride and excitement about the soldiers on the front lines whose daily lives have been widely documented on social media. Quick selfies taken from the trenches in Donbas or videos of men in active combat have led many soldiers to develop a social media presence.

At the beginning of the war, Dmitry posted photos of himself with military gear and called for followers to donate money to Ukraine’s Armed Forces. Over the next 16 months, his followers would more than double, pushing the number of people who watched him along on his fight for Ukraine to 21,000.

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However, he had not expected that he would become an object of desire for Ukrainian women who hoped to encapsulate the soldier’s attention while he protected them from Russia’s wrath. Dmitriy and nearly a dozen other members of Ukraine’s military who The Daily Beast spoke to have been launched into stardom in Ukraine, where women send them sensual text messages while the men duck under trenches on the front lines of the war has become the norm.

A 24-year-old soldier from the Donetsk region, whose name has been withheld because he did not have military clearance to speak, told The Daily Beast that members of Ukraine’s military have definitely noticed an increase in women interested in them. “I think that it raises the fighting spirit,” he said. “Sometimes girls write, but not as often as I would like.”

Another soldier who asked for anonymity said that when he was more active on his Instagram page, which has 5,000 followers, he received more attention from women. “I like female attention. It’s nice when women like soldiers,” he said.

But for Vadim, the soldier stationed in Lviv, the messages he deletes from admirers are an added source of stress. He said that during the first five months of the war, the attention he received from women on Instagram skyrocketed.

For example, when he was stationed in Odesa, some women asked him to meet them on walks, and when he was in Lviv, some women in the military suggested he ask them on dates for drinks. But Vadim has said no to them because he has a girlfriend. However, he said that his friends in the military who are single “usually go on dates and enjoy female attention. It’s an anti-stress thing for them and a way to relax.”

“If I were single, I would do the same. Just imagine: After the service, no one is waiting for you at home, and you want warmth, communication, affection. Everyone wants love, and for men in general, love is what helps them not to lose heart in difficult times,” he added.

The comments on Ukrainian soldiers’ Instagram accounts are inescapable. Some soldiers have tens of thousands of followers, and comments on their posts range from heart emojis to comments about the men protecting Ukraine as “Daddy.” Amidst the swarms of comments from women, some soldiers have met their partners through social media interactions.

Yulia, 30, met her soldier boyfriend, Nazar, 28, on a Telegram channel. Nazar is stationed in what Yulia referred to as “hotspot zero” and the couple first met in person when Nazar was on leave visiting his parents in Drohobych, a town in Western Ukraine in September 2022.

“This is an indescribable admiration for a man, a real man, a worthy son of his country,” she said. She explained that what she likes most about her boyfriend is that he has been a volunteer soldier with Ukraine’s army since 2014.

The attention that soldiers now get, according to Svetlana Pryimak, did not exist before Feb. 24, 2022. “This is due, in my opinion, primarily to the fact that we did not notice before how much the military do for us and what incredible people they are,” she said.

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But not every soldier is as open to the advances. Pryimak said one man told her he didn’t want to meet her because he was unsure he would survive the war. The soldier told Pryimak could only offer her online communication instead of something more. “It’s sad. Many new soldiers don’t make new acquaintances because of this,” she said.

Dmitry said soldiers have more important things to worry about than women on social media, but he added that the newfound soldier kink was a welcome change from when he joined the military in 2016.

Speaking on a Telegram call while he was on vacation in Odesa for the first time after spending 10 months in combat, he said: “No one cared when the war was in the East, people didn’t pay attention, but when the war came to Kyiv, in the capital, everyone started to praise the help of the army.”

As the war progressed, Dmitriy still received messages from women, but they came in waves depending on how well Ukraine’s military was doing. For example, last October, when Ukraine liberated 482 settlements in the Kharkiv region, the soldier said his message count increased.

Sometimes, Dmitriy might talk with a woman or two for a few days. Still, he said, “After some time, you might not reply, so texting is not that often, and then, for example, that girl disappears, and you also might not even notice because you have more important things to do at the moment and that’s how it went.”

On June 10, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky officially announced the beginning of the country’s counter-offensive. The goal of the offensive is to liberate areas in the southeast and around the eastern city of Bakhmut, which has been deemed the epicenter of the war for months. On June 12, Ukrainian officials announced that the military had liberated four Donetsk settlements, including Neskuchne, which had been under Russian occupation for over one year.

Now, as Ukraine liberates more villages from Russian occupation, Dmitriy said that on Instagram women might take the opportunity to try to gain the attention of the soldiers responsible for freeing the region.

“I don’t really want to meet with someone new. I want to sleep in a very good bed, to eat something tasty. I’m not used to such things anymore due to the front lines. Right now, I don’t want to spend time meeting someone new just for the cause of meeting,” he said.

But Dmitriy said that instead of sending messages to soldiers, he would rather women share fundraising posts on Instagram or donate money to the military. He noted that the access to supplies has significantly changed and that, “It’s the rule of life—when you are making something important, people are grateful and glorifying you,” he said. “What we have now with the war, everyone is grateful for the protection.”

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