Quotes of the Week: Frasier, Love Is Blind, Chucky, House of Usher and More
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With appearances from both Frasier and Kitchen Nightmares, our latest Quotes of the Week compilation is straight outta the early aughts.
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In the list below (which we promise was created in the year 2023), we’ve gathered a dozen of TV’s most memorable sound bites from the past seven days, including moments both scripted and unscripted from broadcast, cable and streaming series.
This time around, in addition to the aforementioned revivals, we’ve got quotable moments from The Fall of the House of Usher (grade the premiere and the finale, if you’ve already watched that far!), The Real Housewives of New York City, Magnum P.I. and Chucky.
And if that won’t do, this week’s roundup also features bon mots from Saturday Night Live, The Walking Dead: Daryl Dixon, The Voice, Big Brother and more shows.
Scroll through the list below to see all of our picks for the week, then hit the comments and tell us if we missed any of your faves!
THE VOICE
“Can I hear both of you guys say, ‘Oh, thanks for picking me,’ just so I can hear how it sounds?”
Contestant Angelina Nazarian makes Niall Horan and Reba McEntire go the extra mile before picking a coach
FRASIER
“You missed your grandfather’s funeral. He had everything planned to the last detail… the police sendoff, Daphne’s toast, Bulldog’s ‘Ave Maria…’”
Perhaps the Frasier revival’s biggest crime is not letting us witness Bulldog’s tribute to the late Martin Crane
FRASIER (Bonus Quote!)
“It’s our department head, Olivia Finch. Brilliant scholar, but an absolute terror. Cold, disengaged, narcissistic… she’s called me all those things.”
Alan (Nicholas Lyndhurst) warns Frasier about his Harvard boss and her… harsh judgments
LOVE IS BLIND
“It makes me wonder, ‘Why are you 33 [years old] and single and not married?’ I’m 29 years old, and I can give you everything that a f—king rich, 45-year-old man that you always go for and always fail with can’t give you.”
Izzy, unloading on his ex-fiancée Stacy after being rejected at the altar in the Season 5 finale
MAGNUM P.I.
“You can make it stop, Mr. Magnum.”
“Ah, you don’t have to be so formal.”
Thomas (Jay Hernandez) stays tough amid repeated dunkings into a tub
THE WALKING DEAD: DARYL DIXON
“How long is it going to take?”
“For what?”
“For you to see me different… want me again. Everything happens for a reason. Isn’t that what God’s all about?”
“God loves the sinner.”
“So there’s hope for me, then.”
Quinn (Adam Nagaitis) still thinks he has a prayer of turning up the heat with old flame Sister Isabelle (Clémence Poésy)
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE
“Alaska Airlines says that it’s created a new coffee blend for passengers that tastes better when the plane is in the air. While Spirit Airlines has created a special moonshine they give out when they have to land upside down.”
Weekend Update’s Colin Jost understands the perils of flying Spirit
BIG BROTHER
“Hi, Cory. Let me guess: How do I look?”
“…Good!”
Cory throws Julie Chen Moonves a curveball after every other houseguest made a show of saying she looked “exquisite”
THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW YORK CITY
“We shouldn’t be trying to poke holes in people’s marriages. The only time you want to poke holes is in condoms with really rich men.”
Brynn Whitfield’s three broken engagements make a lot more sense whenever she says things like this
CHUCKY
“Killer dolls are hard. F—kboys are easy.”
Lexy (Alyvia Alyn Lind) has no problem setting thirst traps for the president’s son, especially since he isn’t a maniacal, supernaturally possessed doll
KITCHEN NIGHTMARES
“Give me the head, I’ll get it back in the pond.”
Gordon Ramsay fillets a restaurant owner over a very undercooked salmon
THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER (Episode 3)
“Perry’s dead, the family’s f—ked, you’re the frontline of my PR campaign, and you just took an edible?!”
“You want some?”
“I mean, yeah. I want some.”
Camille (Kate Siegel) changes her tune real quickly when Napoleon (Rahul Kohli) offers her a little of what he’s having
BACHELOR IN PARADISE
“She’s gonna have to evacuate her bowels, or she’s gonna have to evacuate Paradise — which is sad. And also the weirdest way anyone has left here, I think.”
Bartender Wells offers his POV on Sam’s constipation conundrum
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