18 Scenes From TV And Movies That Completely Changed The Way People Viewed Romance And Relationships

Recently, we asked the BuzzFeed Community to tell us which scene from a TV show or movie completely altered and redefined the way they view romance and relationships.

Hold on tight, spider monkey (spoiler alert: there are disappointingly no Twilight scenes), because here are some of the most heartwarming, heart-melting, and heart-aching responses:

1."Bit of a weird pull, but Fiona and Shrek in Shrek 4. Specifically, Shrek tells Fiona he's her true love, but in Rumpelstiltskin's universe, Shrek was never there to save Fiona from the tower. So when he says, 'I'm your true love,' she replies, 'Then where were you when I needed you?' That made me realize that love on its own is not enough. You have to stand by someone and have their back, and be able to depend on them in return."

2."In Parks and Rec, the first time I heard Leslie and Ben say, 'I like you and I love you,' I knew I could not settle for anything less. I know too many couples that love each other, but they don’t like each other."

3."On the tragic side of things, I have to go with Elliot and Angela's dynamic in Mr. Robot, especially during the scenes in Season 3. What I learned from Elliot: People you see as best friends might not be the good people you thought. Don't let them abuse you and hurt you just because you claim them to be your friends. Always surround yourself with the people who genuinely care about you. Love yourself and take good care of yourself."

4."In Frozen 2, when Kristoff told Anna, 'I’m here. What do you need?' The fact that he wasn’t assuming and just wanted to do whatever he could to help was big. Their entire relationship is so amazing to me."

5."The Alexis and Ted breakup scene in Schitt's Creek. It was such a mature and healthy end to their relationship, and it wasn't dramatic like other shows would portray a breakup. They knew they needed to be realistic about where their relationship was going, and it just showed how you can still deeply love someone while still knowing that your lives are meant to go in different directions."

6."Ben Warren and Miranda Bailey from Grey's Anatomy. They taught me that relationships aren't perfect. Sure, people fight and disagree, but that doesn't mean you cheat or just walk away. No matter what they argue about, they end up talking and working it out. Honestly, to me, it shows a healthy, mature relationship."

7."The entirety of Sense and Sensibility. Impetuous, passionate romance doesn't mean anything if it isn't backed by security, consideration, and gentleness."

8.The Orville has dropped two lines on me that changed how I approach relationships. The big one was when Bortus and his partner, Klyden (both from an all-male species), gave birth to a girl. They had an argument that led to a court case, and Bortus's loss in court meant that his daughter would be 'corrected' into a male. When asked if he would accept the child still, Bortus says, 'I have to at least try. I love him.' That taught me about how to deal with hard times. The second is a line out of the Captain's mouth: 'Love can overcome all boundaries. Anything less is cowardice.' It made me want to become better for the woman who’s now my girlfriend."

9."Watching Heartstopper actually gave me the push I needed to confront my needs in my last relationship and eventually (not soon enough) break up with my ex. In Heartstopper, Charlie's teacher tells him, 'Don't let anyone make you disappear.' In all of Heartstopper, Nick and Charlie never stopped showing or telling each other what they meant to each other. They showed affection in public and were not ashamed of standing by and protecting one another, all while still allowing each other space to grow. Seeing Charlie and Nick authentically communicate, yet still respect each other, caused me to re-evaluate my relationship at the time."

10."In Shadow & Bone Season 2, when Jesper said he'd give it his best in his relationship with Wylan. Something about that really showed me that I should be with someone who cares just as much about the relationship as I do."

11."In Season 6, Episode 6 of 30 Rock, Liz Lemon and her serious boyfriend, Criss, have a huge fight in IKEA while they are trying to buy a dining room table on Valentine’s Day. She leaves him there in a huff and immediately starts to regret that they are no longer together. It takes Liz a while to get back to her apartment, where there she finds Criss setting a table he made from driftwood for Valentine’s dinner. She is shocked he’s still there and says she thought they broke up because they had a huge fight. He basically tells her 'no way,' and that sometimes she’s gonna freak out and he’s just gonna get over it. Liz asks him, 'If we do that then how will we ever break up?' Criss says, 'Maybe we’ll never break up.'"

12."The ending of Casablanca was a sentiment from a different time. Rick allows Ilsa to leave, not only to save her from the war, but also because her husband, Victor, needed her. Rick even tells Victor that his wife was never unfaithful to him — generosity with nothing received in return. Rick chooses the good fight over the great love of his life, which is contrary to the sentiments of my generation. It taught me the importance of the world around me as opposed to the selfishness of my individual story."

13."In Charlie Chaplin's masterpiece, City Lights, when the Tramp shows his selflessness when he gives up everything and goes to prison, just so the Flower Girl can receive her surgery and get her eyesight back. It always gets me deep when he genuinely tries to avoid her finding out it was him (as she still believed that he, as a rich benefactor, was the one who gave her the money). But he can't avoid her, and she finds out it was him — the real destitute him. And her surprise is replaced with solid devotion and thanks. Her face reads something like, 'Yes, I can see now.' Sacrifice, the true definition of love. And sacrifice only means something if you really can't afford it, like the Tramp."

14."When Jake Ryan waits outside Samantha Baker's house in Sixteen Candles and confesses his feelings to her. I will admit, Jake was a bit dense throughout the movie and didn't make the best decisions regarding relationships, but what stuck with me was that from the moment he saw Sam at the dance, he knew what he wanted and went after it. When they celebrated Sam's birthday together, it really helped solidify my outlook on romance, and became my favorite movie of all time."

15."I guess the scene from One Day, where Emma tells Dexter that she loves him but doesn't like him anymore. It so beautifully articulated the rifts in love for me. Every individual changes as they age, so sometimes it's actually very hard to accept the changes, whether the changes are recent quirks or aspects of their personality. Yet when it's all said and done, the intrinsic love never changes, because if love isn't unconditional, then it isn't love."

16."Gilmore Girls. Rory could be problematic, but seeing Dean's negative reaction to Rory not being ready to say, 'I love you,' and then later in the show seeing Rory give Logan the space not to immediately return her spoken 'I love you,' was very impactful. Other relationships on TV back then usually had everyone on the same page, and it had never occurred to teenage me that you didn't have to return any feelings right away. Understanding that was a big benefit to my personal life."

17."A lot of films and shows shaped my perspective on romance, but these films definitely altered my view forever. In Little Women (2019), Laurie's proposal to Jo was even more gut-wrenching than in the book. I could feel the pain in his heart, but could also feel the pain in Jo's knowing she could not provide Teddy (Laurie) with what he yearns for. It showed me that soulmates don't always come in the form of a romantic partner, and that sometimes a platonic friendship is much healthier than a romantic one that's been doomed from the start."

18."The other film is 500 Days of Summer. The duality in the Expectations vs. Reality scene hits harder when you've lived, breathed, and devoted your soul to someone, only to realize they didn't truly love you as you had loved them. You can stretch your devotion to the ends of the universe, but that doesn't stop your expectations from facing the cruel reality of it all. The ending, of course, offers a hopeful idea that even if you devoted your entire being of love to one person, that doesn't mean you can't love again...or love harder than you previously did."

Do you have a scene from a TV show or movie that completely changed your perspective of romantic expectations and relationships? Let us know in the comments and we can all love love together!