An ode to Jennifer Coolidge as the iconic Karen in The Watcher

Joey Nolfi
·6 min read
3

Warning: This article contains spoilers for The Watcher.

Some queens are queens because of their talent. Some queens are queens because of their royal bloodline. Jennifer Coolidge's real estate diva Karen in The Watcher is a woman with neither, but she's still an icon, she's a legend, and she is the moment — every second she's on screen in Ryan Murphy's thrilling true crime Netflix series.

Below, EW rounds up Coolidge's best moments (with time stamps) from the series, including her impractical tennis footwear, her penchant for a "holiday pour" of wine, that Emmy-worth delivery of one of the most profane words in the English language, and every other exchange that brings much-needed comedic relief to a dire story about a family (Naomi Watts, Bobby Cannavale) tormented by anonymous, threatening letters from a maniacal stalker.

The Watcher
The Watcher

Netflix (3) Jennifer Coolidge's best moments as Karen in 'The Watcher'

Episode 1 — "Welcome, Friends"

4:05 — We're not introduced to Karen, but rather the side of Karen's blonde hair, as she's looking down at her phone, texting on the job at 657 Boulevard while she's supposed to be selling a multi-million-dollar home. We stan a lady who thinks, "F--- a commission!" to herself, yet still gets an offer without lifting a finger.

6:50 — A man later revealed to be Roger Kaplan (Michael Nouri) asks her if the house she's responsible for showing to prospective buyers was built by "indentured servants," to which she responds: "How would I know?" Queen of not knowing how to do her job!

7:53 — Greeting Bobby Cannavale by saying "hubba, hubba" is the only appropriate way to greet Bobby Cannavale.

23:25 — Karen asks Nora (Watts) why she would buy her son "a weasel" with reference to his adorable pet ferret. Queen of not knowing (again) mammalian species!

23:35 — Seconds after insulting the rodent community, she stands up for her fellow women at the country club, squealing, "Eat a dick, Stephanie!" in the direction of a woman presumably named Stephanie.

25:47 — Describing her ex-husband, Karen says, "He was a real, like, p---y and he couldn't, like, he couldn't make his junk work." Reason enough for leaving a marriage and taking the house out from under your man? Absolutely, queen!

Episode 2 — "Blood Sacrifice"

15:07 — At one of their no-dressing-on-salad lunches at the country club, Karen, in an attempt to dissuade Nora from moving back to Manhattan, asks her friend: "Did you know that New York City is going to be underwater in, like, five years?" Climate change awareness advocate! She also asks Nora — a sculptural artist — if her plan is to "sell [her] pots" in the city. She's actually a patron saint of the arts for this, because all great artists need to be knocked down several pegs so they can muster the inspiration to strive for more.

The Watcher
The Watcher

Netflix Jennifer Coolidge's Karen wants more wine in 'The Watcher'

Episode 3 — "Götterdämmerung"

5:52 — Deep into a tennis match with Nora, Karen says she "didn't get the memo that we were doing cardio today," seemingly despite dressing for, uh, a tennis match. Her outfit includes wedge heels, though, so she's clearly into turning looks, not points on the board.

9:34 — Seated at their favorite table at the country club, Karen requests an extra "holiday pour" (lmao) of wine from her favorite waitress after she doesn't adequately fill her glass.

10:46 — Again, she encourages Nora to sell her home and envision a downsized future with Dean at a new abode, where she can "use [her] little kiln and cook some pots." Cook. Some. Pots!!!?

Episode 4 — "Someone to Watch Over Me"

29:31 — When Nora's daughter, Ellie, vengefully releases a viral TikTok falsely claiming that her dad (Cannavale) is racist, Karen feigns sympathy by telling Nora that her life is over because the internet is forever, and that it makes the most sense for her to sell her house and get a divorce. Queen of preparedness, because she drew up a contract beforehand and — would you look at that — she brought it with her! Besties supporting besties.

The Watcher
The Watcher

Netflix Karen (Jennifer Coolidge) screaming at Nora (Naomi Watts) in 'The Watcher'

Episode 5 — "Occam's Razor"

34:23 — The way Karen yells, "Security!" when Dean and Nora confront her at the country club is *chef's kiss while said chef makes Italian-Amerian red sauce on butcher block countertops*

Episode 6 — "The Gloaming"

39:59 — Perhaps the greatest moment in 2022 television comes after Nora confronts Karen for leaking her horror story about 657 Boulevard to Page Six, telling her that she thought they were friends. Coolidge's delivery of the next line, "I thought we were friends, too. C--t!" should be studied by Julliard students for approximately 1 million years to come.

The Watcher
The Watcher

Netflix Karen (Jennifer Coolidge) stalks an intruder in 'The Watcher' finale.

Episode 7 — "Haunting"

31:26 — In a final discussion with Nora inside 657 Boulevard — now owned by Karen, who's remodeling with, of all things, pink marble — she effectively reduces the entire series to dust by admonishing her ex-friend for upending her life over "dumb ass letters that weren't even scary," and relishes the thought of someone stepping on her son's (R.I.P.) "pet beaver or muskrat, or whatever the f--- it was."

37:26 — After only lightly indulging several (many) red flags while alone inside her new home (Creepy phone call? Overflowing bathtub that she definitely didn't turn on herself?), Karen deduces that the best way to fight her would-be murderer is to hold her adorable dog in one arm while holding a butcher knife in the other. Queen of effective defense mechanisms!

37:54 — Again, after feeling terrified enough to arm herself with a butcher knife after a psycho entered her home and turned on the bathtub, Karen decides that she's going to just go to bed, and puts an eye mask over her face, completely depriving her of one of the most important senses when it comes to evading a killer. Queen of not caring!

40:33 — Karen does evade capture, though she's lucky enough to be the only person who actually comes face-to-shrouded-face with The Watcher after they pop out from a trap door on her staircase. She runs out the door, screaming into the night while sprinting down Boulevard with no shoes on. The world is your runway, diva!

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