Nina Gilfert | From the Porch Steps: Raising children

I can't think of a more important job than raising a family. When one spouse leaves the job to the other by walking out on the obligation, the job is doubled for that parent because they have to be both father and mother, an almost impossible task. I've been there and I know how difficult it can be.

Every time I go through my family photographs I run across pictures of my five children, all grown up, with smiling, happy faces. They are probably not as beautiful as I think they are but I am doubly proud of them.

Each one of my children was born with a different set of characteristics. Since I can't change who I am and I certainly can't change who they are, they have grown up to be very different in personality and character. Since they are all honest and are able to cope with their lives and are all happily married, I can breath a sigh of relief.

More Nina: The Personal Touch

Thanks!: Leesburg Area Chamber hosts annual teacher, staff appreciation event ahead of new school year

Urgent need: Ahead of 2022-23 school year, Lake County schools face teacher, staffing shortages

They aren't perfect but they are reasonably happy and productive and have given me some nice grandchildren. As the song goes, “Who could ask for anything more?”

Am I being too boastful when I say I believe I have changed the world a little for the better? When your children grow up to be resourceful, industrious and contented people, you have given the best you can to the world.

They in turn will raise good citizens. It multiplies as each generation passes the baton. There are no geniuses in my family, just good, intelligent folks.

So that tiny baby who just raised his head and smiled at you may be the one who changes the world. When you see your children and grandchildren that way, you must take a little more pride in who they are.

When your little one walks to the school bus for the first time you will wonder if the things he does and the changes he makes will make the world a better place.

I remember when I had my first baby in the hospital. After he was born the attendant rolled me down the corridor on a bed to my room and I was so excited and proud that I called to everyone I saw and told them that I had the most beautiful baby that ever was born and that he was a boy who would change the world.

He is in his seventies now and has three sons, two sisters and two brothers, all grown up and all good people with families of their own. He certainly has changed his corner of the world.

My second baby was a girl. I found out when she was a couple days old that she would have to be in an incubator with oxygen for some time and that she might not survive. I was devastated and her daddy and I cried on each others shoulders every night until she was two months old and the doctor suddenly called and said we could take her home.

I was ecstatic when I went to the hospital to take home the baby I thought we were going to lose. She was very thin and I was scared to death of her. I was so afraid I might do something and cause her to get sick again.

By the time she was a year old she looked the picture of health but she never was very strong. She did grow up to raise an adopted family of two and to help raise a grandson.

She was frail physically but strong emotionally which sometimes happens in life. The one balances out the other.

I had three more children, two boys and a girl, all quite healthy, thank you. My second husband had a spoiled little 4-year-old boy for me to raise with my own brood. Scottie didn't understand the idea of sharing and was miserable for a while but learned to appreciate having live-in playmates.

When my children spent a weekend with their father, he and I did all the things he liked to do and was used to doing with his dad who often worked out of town. Unlike most little boys, he liked to dress up and go out to dinner at a restaurant so that is what we did on Saturday nights when the other children were with their father and his father was out of town. You try to keep everybody happy.

Today, happily, my children have children and their children have children. I live with my oldest son and his wife on the side of a mountain surrounded by a forest of trees. It is beautiful here with all the greenery in the summer and the fall colors. It is a lovely place to grow old which I plan on doing one of these days.

Nina Gilfert can be reached at ngporch@gmail.com

This article originally appeared on Daily Commercial: Nina: There is nothing more important than raising children