'Monica the Medium': College Student Contacts Dead Spirits
One of my favorite lines from any TV show this year is uttered in the first episode of Monica the Medium, when the real-life college student psychic Monica Ten-Kate says, “College boys really suck: Once they find out I can talk to the dead, it freaks them out and they are long gone.”
Woe unto the luckless boy who dates Monica, who is likely to stop after the first Jell-O shot and tell the poor mope about how his dead grandmother wants to assure him she’s doing fine and playing mahjong in heaven. In the premiere episode of ABC Family’s new reality series, Monica brings a Penn State barbecue party to a complete halt when she starts getting messages “from spirit” about one attendee’s dead father.
Cory, who up until then had been perfectly happy playing flip cup with all his other beer-swilling pals, has to stop and get all teary-eyed as Monica grabs his hand and tells him all the wonderful things Grandpa thought of him. Filmed in a post-medium session presumably after a few cups of coffee, Corey addresses the camera to give his eloquent reaction: “Blew my mind! Hashtag Shocked Me!”
The show follows Monica and her pals as they roam around the Penn State campus as juniors looking for boys and fun. Monica says things like, “My roommates don’t know how hard it is to be balancing being a medium and a college student” — this, despite the fact that her roommates are constantly subjected to her sudden fortune-telling. The roomies take her shopping for a dress for Monica’s blind date (“It’s really hard to find a guy when you’re a medium,” Monica whines) and, wouldn’t you know, suddenly everyone starts moving in slow-motion and spooky music rises up on the soundtrack — it’s the show’s recurring signal that Monica is picking up a vibe.
Pretty soon, Monica’s roommates and the staff of the store are standing around watching as she tells one young sales assistant the latest in otherworldly updates about her uncle who was shot to death, and info for another salesgirl who knew someone with lung cancer. In that last instance, Monica started gasping for air and said, “Someone’s laboring my breathing… did anyone you know have cancer?” A wracked sob from the girl. In all, Monica seemed to “give readings” to the whole store. It almost made them late for their mani-pedi appointment, where she told a manicurist about that woman’s dead friend: “Please know that Stephanie is at peace, and she loved you so much!”
It’s difficult to separate the mawkish phoniness of Monica’s patter (everybody gets a variation on “So-and-so is at peace”) and the sophisticated phoniness of what she calls her “medium-ship.” No, I don’t believe Monica is truly getting messages “from spirit” — for a smooth-talking chatterbox, she mangles the English language constantly — and I’d like Monica the Medium to be fact-checked by master debunkers Penn and Teller immediately, please.
Nevertheless, I’m sure you’ve read my mind and know what happens with Monica’s blind date. This episode and the coming attractions suggest audiences will be following Monica as she continues to carry the burden of imparting uplifting messages to unsuspecting sales people and badgering family members such as her father, who’s working in Afghanistan but isn’t far enough away to avoid Monica, who hectors him via Skype: “Have you ‘liked’ my Monica the Medium Facebook page yet?”
I think I speak for everyone in this reality series when I say, chill out, girl.
Monica the Medium premieres Aug. 25 at 8 p.m. on ABC Family.
