Monica Beverly Hillz reveals why she was almost 'done with drag' before RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars 8
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After nearly quitting the art form altogether, the only thing Monica Beverly Hillz is leaving in the dust is the RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars 8 competition.
The season 5 alum — who, after Kylie Sonique Love revealed her truth at the season 2 reunion, made history by becoming the first Drag Race contestant to come out as trans during the main competition — exclusively tells EW why she almost left drag before discovering a new side of herself and her creative aesthetic ahead of returning for AS8.
"I did not want to come back. I was pretty much done with drag, period," Monica admits in the video interview above. "About two years ago, I had my name changed legally, I was going through a lot of trying to find out who I was because, honestly, after the show, you don't really have time to think about who you are or what you're going to do, it's already planned out for you. Traveling for so many years, it was like, I just need time for myself."
EW Monica Beverly Hillz for EW.
She explains that a period of introspection prompted by isolation during the COVID pandemic allowed her to focus on personal growth — enough so that she felt empowered to return to the Main Stage with a vengeance.
Monica also notes that seeing an increase in trans representation on the show — from season 9's Peppermint, All Stars 6 winner Kylie, season 13's Gottmik, and the history-making five trans queens who competed at once on season 14 — communicated to her that now was the right time to re-establish herself on the show.
"That was one of the main focuses when they asked me to come back, Iwas like, you know what, I'm history. How could I not come back?" she says. "So, definitely, I'm coming back. I'm going to do this, and I'm going to finish what I started."
As personal of a hurdle as her coming-out moment was back on season 5, Monica appreciates the journey she went on because of how it connected her with fans around the world.
"When you hear every judge say the same critique, you can't help but be like, okay, if I don't open up now and take this moment — not just for myself but for so many people like myself who don't have this opportunity — then I'd be really upset with myself. So, I was like, let me just let it all out and see what happens, and whatever happens here, if I do go home, I'm fine because I let it free," she recalls.
She continues, "To this day, I still get letters of people [loving] that moment. I couldn't even watch it until two or three years later, because I wasn't mentally ready to see that, but I'm happy that I did it and the response is still amazing."
RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars 8 premieres May 12 on Paramount+. Watch Monica's full interview above.
Subscribe to EW's Quick Drag podcast for recaps of RuPaul's Drag Race, including reactions with the cast, special guests, and more.
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