TikToker Michelle Panzica (@dorkytwinmom) is a busy mom of twins who often shares videos featuring her adorable son and daughter as well as clips of her discussing grief based on her experience as a widow, and single-parenthood. Recently Panzica posted a video of her son Maddox explaining how he misses his dad, and it’s incredibly touching.
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The clip begins with footage of Maddox strapped in the back seat of his mom’s car. “Daddy’s taking too long in heaven. It’s [a] very long time,” Maddox mentions from his car seat. His eyes widen, and he nods his head as if he can’t believe it.
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“Yeah, he is taking a long time, isn’t he?” Panzica says from behind the camera. “Soooooo a long time,” the innocent boy responds.
“Well, that’s because when someone goes to heaven, they… they stay in heaven,” Panzica carefully explains, “Until we meet them there someday.”
“No, we can’t go into the clouds,” Panzica soberly confirms while her son continues to stare out the car window.
“No, because it’s too boggy in there,” Maddox observes, turning back to face his mom. “There are too many bugs in the clouds?” Panzica giggles, lightening the mood.
“No! Too boggy,” Maddox declares with a smile. “Boggy? What’s boggy?” Panzica asks. “Us can’t see in the clouds,” Maddox explains, to which his mom replies, now understanding, “Ohhh yeah, it’s hard to see in the clouds, huh?”
“Yeah, but you can’t go in them. Only airplanes,” Maddox says. “Only airplanes can go in the clouds?” Panzica asks. “Yeah, us can’t see in them,” Maddox explains with a smile before turning to look out the car window.
“I love you, buddy,” Panzica says. “I love you too,” trills Maddox in the sweetest little voice.
Panzica’s moving video had TikTok viewers choked up.
“His little face as he processes the fact that someone stays in heaven,” one user observed.
“My mom is taking a long time in heaven too, buddy,” shared one sympathetic viewer.
“I am so sorry. My children lost siblings, and it is so heavy on my heart when they try to understand where they are,” another viewer commented.
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