Mom Who Gave Birth to 2 Sets of Twins Is 'Thankful' for Time with Late Daughter: 'My Little Angel' (Exclusive)

Ashley Ness looks forward to Thanksgiving with her three surviving quadruplets, while remembering the short life of her daughter Chesley, who died at almost 7 months old

Last Thanksgiving, Ashley Ness — who gave birth to two sets of identical twins in July 2022 — was at her daughter’s side as the tiny infant battled for her life. This year, Chesley — who died seven months later without ever leaving the hospital — will be in the Massachusetts family’s thoughts.

“I miss her so much,” Ness tells PEOPLE in an exclusive interview. “Not a day goes by without thinking of her, but I’m fortunate that I was able to at least spend some holidays with her.”

Keeping with tradition, the family will be spending Thanksgiving Day with Ness' parents and siblings.

“There’s no gifts involved, just purely family being together,” Ness says. “I grew up with that and love having us all together. And I want to make sure my children always have that too. Family is so important.”

This year that rings even more true as the family gathers for their first Thanksgiving since they lost Chesley.

Related: After Daughter's Death, Mom of Quads (Who Are Also Twins) Says 3 Surviving Babies 'Keep Me Strong' [Exclusive]

The Massachusetts mom gave birth to two sets of twins — girls Chesley and Chatham and boys Chance and Cheston — in July 2022. They're the first shared children with her partner Val Bettencourt, 49.  Bettencourt has three children, two of whom are living at the family home with Ness' daughter. It makes for a hectic life.

“I feel like I’ve never, and I still truly haven’t, been able to grieve her loss,” Ness says. “I don’t have that time that I can just sit there and just bawl my eyes out and not do anything or not have to care for anybody. It is hard.”

Now with the holidays arriving, Ness says she feels the loss more acutely. However, she feels blessed to have been able to have Chesley for at least her first holidays of Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas before she died not long after Valentine’s Day.

Those days, she says, are the hardest.

“I have to have a smile on my face. I have to go through with my daily routines,” Ness says. “I can't really let it consume me because I have so many other little people and family members that are depending on me.”

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A pregnancy like Ness' is a rarity of "like 1 in 10 million," Dr. Ahmet Baschat, director of the Center for Fetal Therapy and a professor in the Johns Hopkins Medicine Department of Gynecology and Obstetrics, who was not involved in her care, previously told PEOPLE.

The phenomenon occurs when two eggs are fertilized at the same time and then each fertilized egg divides again, Baschat said. Because each split egg remains encased in its own placenta — unlike traditional quadruplets, where each of the four would represent an individually fertilized egg and be encased separately — two sets of identical twins are the result.

Related: Doctor Raises Teen Whose Parents Died After Seeing Former Patient’s Facebook Post: 'Meant to Be' (Exclusive)

Ness and Bettencourt knew it would be a high-risk pregnancy. And she already had four miscarriages. The part-time hair stylist had resigned herself to the reality that she had been blessed with a family that included her daughter Chanel, now 10, Ness’ youngest sons Isaiah, 12, and Zayden, 9,  and his daughter Tyra, 25, who lives outside of the home.

“When we found out it was multiples, it was stressful,” Ness admits. “We have a small home, financially it’s difficult and then the medical issues.”

Ness' newborns were delivered after 28 weeks and two days — about 12 weeks earlier than a full-term pregnancy. Three of the quads were released from the hospital last October, but Chesley never left.

“I'm grateful that I have the videos and pictures of them, even though yes, she's in her hospital bed, but they're all together,” Ness says. “I have that. As they get older, they will be able to see Chesley’s infamous side eye she'd always do whenever I would put the boys next to her.”

The mom says it’s important Chesley is never forgotten and never left out of conversations. She has photos of Chesley with her siblings around the house and says she speaks about her late daughter every day.

“Chatham always kisses her pictures just on her own,” Ness says. “And it makes me feel good they will know their sister. I still call 'em the quads.”

When she’s out with her babies, people will comment on her triplets. She’s quick to correct them about the number of children she has and tell them about the little girl who passed away.

“I love being out in public and people asking me because we get to talk about her,” Ness says. “I get to tell her story and that right there keeps her alive with us.”

Related: NICU Nurse Who Adopted Teen Mom of Triplets Has 'Seen Her Blossom' Into 'Such a Hands-On Parent'

Ness now she wants to use Chesley’s journey to help others who are dealing with grief.  She says she did everything she could to give Chesley a fighting chance at life.

“I was at her bedside every single day, and to watch your child struggle is the hardest thing in the world, and to lose your child is the hardest thing,” Ness says. “But she’s my little angel and she’s not suffering any more.”

Ness says she feels blessed for her time with Chesley.

“I am truthfully so thankful that I almost got seven months with her when I could have lost her early,” Ness says. “She gave me amazing months of life with her. Granted, it was not all rainbows and butterflies, but I have a memory of being able to show her how much I loved her.”

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