Marlo Thomas Celebrates Husband Phil Donahue's 88th Birthday by Toasting a Custom Cocktail with Pals (Exclusive)

"When you're with someone as long as I've been with Phil, you have to get creative," Thomas tells PEOPLE at the bash, attended by pals Al Roker, George Stephanopoulos and Ali Wentworth

Marlo Thomas has given a lot of birthday gifts to husband Phil Donahue during their 44 years together, but the one she gave him this year might just be the most unique!

The actress and St. Jude Children's Research Hospital director threw a star-studded dinner party on Thursday in New York City to honor Donahue's 88th birthday, toasting him with a custom cocktail she created in his honor.

"When you're with someone as long as I've been with Phil, you have to get creative. I mean, how many watches can you buy your husband?" Thomas, 86, tells PEOPLE exclusively at the bash, held at the historic and festive Pete's Tavern in Gramercy. "What am I going to get him? I've gotten him money clips and cashmere everything — he's practically got cashmere underwear at this point, right? I had to think outside the box."

Related: Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue's Marriage: All About Their Decades-Long Romance

From there, Thomas reached out to Jameson for help. "I called Jameson on a lark. I said, 'You're the greatest Irish whiskey there is. Phil is such a famous Irish guy, there are bars named Donahue. I don't want to pay you anything, and I don't want you to pay me anything, but would you just create a drink for me? That's all I want,'" she recalls. "And they generously agreed to help."

Jameson provided Thomas with three options to choose from. "I had a party at my house, where we all tried the three drinks," says Thomas. "One of them was too spicy, one of them was lemony — which, I'll use during the summer. But this one was perfect."

Dubbed "The Donahue," Thomas served the beverage up to guests Thursday night — in her tortoise shell double old-fashioned glasses from her William Sonoma collection, naturally — to toast Donahue's milestone.

Among the famous faces in the crowd were the Today show's longtime weatherman Al Roker, as well as Good Morning America anchor George Stephanopoulos and his comedian wife of 22 years, Ali Wentworth. "These are some of our dearest friends, and I just knew Phil would enjoy spending the holidays with them," Thomas tells PEOPLE.

Donahue — whose Dec. 21 birthday is still around the corner — had to miss the party at the last minute due to a health issue, but he was very much there in spirit as his friends shared their love for him in their remarks.

Related: Marlo Thomas Says ‘Love, Listening and Lust’ Keeps Her 43-Year Marriage to Phil Donahue Strong (Exclusive)

To join the celebration, fans can make 'The Donahue' for themselves: simply mix 1 ½ parts Jameson Black Barrel, ½ parts Demerara Syrup, 1 dash of Angostura Bitters and ½ pint Imperial Stout.

"It's delicious," Thomas said. "I don't know what the hell I'm going to get him next year, but this is this year."

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Thomas and Donahue first met in 1977, when she was a guest on his talk show. They began dating and wed just a few years later. in 1980.

Four decades later, they released their first joint project together — a book called What Makes a Marriage Last: 40 Celebrated Couples Share with Us the Secrets to a Happy Life. The 2020 book featured interviews with other famous couples discussing their own long marriages.

So what's the secret to Thomas and Donahue's enduring union? "Through the years, you learn that everything is not that big a deal, and this isn't going to break us up no matter what, so you get used to saying, 'OK, let's just talk it out,' " she previously told AARP.

"The secret of good communication? Screaming helps," Donahue joked to the outlet. "At least then you know if whether the person you're screaming at is listening. Then go in the other room and count to 10."

He also shared, "A little humor certainly in a marriage goes a long way."

**This recipe was provided to PEOPLE by a chef, restaurant or culinary professional. It has not been tested for home use.**

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