“Love Is Blind”'s AD Had 'Many Conversations About Not Moving Forward' with Clay — and He Vowed Not to 'Embarrass' Her

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Clay Gravesande shocked 'Love Is Blind' fans when he left Amber Desiree “AD” Smith at the altar in the season 6 finale of the Netflix reality show

<p>Greg Gayne/Netflix</p> Clay Gravesande and Amber Desiree “AD” Smith on the season 6 reunion of

Greg Gayne/Netflix

Clay Gravesande and Amber Desiree “AD” Smith on the season 6 reunion of 'Love Is Blind'

Amber Desiree “AD” Smith is setting the record straight about the conversations she and Clay Gravesande had on Love Is Blind before he left her at the altar.

The Netflix reality star, 32, revealed on Thursday’s episode of Nick Viall’s podcast The Viall Files that she and her ex-fiancé, 31, had “many conversations about not moving forward” ahead of their wedding day.

Not only did AD admit that she was comfortable with not tying the knot on the series, she also described Clay as being the one who was insistent on getting married and even vowed not to “embarrass” her.

“Clay and I had so many conversations about not moving forward,” AD told The Bachelorette alum, 43, explaining that, although it may have looked like she was all in and he had reservations, the two were candid with one another off-screen.

Related: Love Is Blind: The Biggest Bombshells from the Season 6 Reunion

“I know it looks like I’m blindly following him off a cliff and he’s telling me, ‘I don’t want to marry you,’ and I’m like, ‘Okay, let’s go get married.’ And he’s like, ‘No I don’t want to. I’m like, ‘Yeah,'" the real estate agent said. “There were so many conversations where I was like, ‘I’m good to walk away. I’m good. I’m good to walk away.’"

AD continued, “And he’d be like, ‘No AD, I really want to try. I really want to do this. I really want to make this work with you.’”

With that reassurance, AD said she felt ready to give their relationship a “try.” She shared, “He would actually try and do things differently and show up for me in certain ways, and then he would hit me with a sprinkle like, ‘I’m just afraid to get married.’”

“And I’m like, ‘Okay, again, we do not have to do this. I’m okay. I would rather not be humiliated in front of all of my family and friends,’” she continued. "And he’d be like, ‘AD, I’m not going to embarrass you. I’m not going to humiliate you.’ And I said, ‘Okay.’"

AD added, “And then what did he do? Embarrass me.”

<p>Courtesy of Netflix</p> Clay Gravesande and Amber Desiree “AD” Smith on season 6 of 'Love Is Blind'

Courtesy of Netflix

Clay Gravesande and Amber Desiree “AD” Smith on season 6 of 'Love Is Blind'

Related: Love Is Blind's Sarah Ann Continues to 'Stand by' Pursuing Jeramey: 'I Am Not a Villain' (Exclusive)

She also shared that on their wedding day, she felt as though “there was a chance” that Clay wouldn’t want to go through with it, but she “didn’t think” that would happen with all of their family present.

On Friday, Clay addressed his role in their breakup on Instagram, noting, "When I stood at the altar, I faced the hardest truth of my life." Calling his journey on the show "raw" and "unfiltered," Clay admitted that "it wasn't always pretty, but it was real."

"I had to confront my own fears and wounds head-on. It was terrifying but it was also the beginning of a profound journey of self-discovery and accountability. I'm forever changed by this experience and eternally grateful for the lessons," he wrote before posting screengrabs from Love Is Blind creator Chris Coelen's X post, which commended Clay for giving the show "everything he had."

"I want to specifically express my admiration for Clay, who made it all the way to the altar, even though he did not get married. It would have been easy to back out, but I feel he gave it everything he had. And with all the information, he made the right choice for himself - and while it felt heartbreaking for AD, ultimately it feels like the right long-term choice for them as a couple," Coelen wrote in part. "Clay and his family shared their story bravely, with honesty, vulnerability and grace, and in the process inspired people across the world... I am really proud of them, of AD and her family, and of all our participants."

The entrepreneur’s decision to call off his and AD’s wedding in the season 6 finale of the Netflix dating show was a shock among Love Is Blind fans, and led to Clay confronting the generational trauma caused by his father’s infidelity in the 24 years that his parents were married.

During the season 6 reunion, AD opened up about her strong feelings for Clay and how painful it was to be left at the altar.

"You had your chance, there's nothing that I wouldn't have given you, there's nothing I wouldn't have done for you,” the fan-favorite cast member told Clay. “And low key, respectfully, you played in my f---ing face... because you knew that you didn't want to get married.”

She also explained that learning more about her ex’s family history and watching the confrontation between his mother Margarita and father Trevor “closed the circle” in her questions about his inability to commit. "I didn’t want to, respectfully, be Clay's mom in long run," AD admitted. "I didn’t want that to be my story."

<p>Courtesy of Netflix</p> Amber Desiree “AD” Smith and Clay Gravesande's wedding on the season 6 finale of 'Love Is Blind'

Courtesy of Netflix

Amber Desiree “AD” Smith and Clay Gravesande's wedding on the season 6 finale of 'Love Is Blind'

Related: Love Is Blind: Clay's Mom Says Her 'Heart Was Broken' After Trauma from His Dad's Cheating Caused Him to Reject AD

Clay, meanwhile, revealed in the reunion that he has been trying to “put the work in” by attending therapy. "I wanna be a good guy, I wanna be the best version I can be and it sucks I wasn't like that for you," he told AD. "It wasn't intentional... it broke my heart to break your heart."

The TV personality added, "I came out a different man and I have to credit that to AD. When someone changes your life, you don’t turn your back on them.”

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Love Is Blind season 6 is streaming in full on Netflix.

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