On Wednesday, the former NSYNC member, 40, opened up to Entertainment Tonight about their surrogate’s loss at eight weeks with a baby boy. Though, Bass says, it’s not uncommon to experience setbacks in the IVF process, he couldn’t help but foresee his life as a parent months away.
“You try to trick yourself into not getting excited because you know anything can happen at any time, especially in those first few weeks when there’s a huge possibility that the [embryos] won’t stick,” he told ET. “You keep telling yourself that and trying not to get your hopes up, but you’re always going to have those thoughts in the back of your brain where you’re already planning out their lives.”
He added: “That’s the thing that sucks — you can’t help yourself from thinking those thoughts and having this perfect world scenario in your mind. Getting over that has been hard.”
Jon Kopaloff/FilmMagic Michael Turchin and Lance Bass
Bass, who tied the knot with Turchin in December 2014, explained that there have been “way more downs than ups” along their journey to become parents, and that “everything happens for a reason and when it needs to happen, it’ll have to happen.”
“I’m trying not to worry about it,” he said. “Of course, in a perfect world I would love to have my own kids. But if it’s not meant in the cards, then it’s not meant in the cards and there are plenty of kids who need adopting.”
Bass added, “I’m not opposed to going right ahead and adopting if this fails next time.”
In August, Bass told PEOPLE Now that he and Turchin have hit a lot of “walls” on their path to parenthood, but have grown closer with each failed attempt at IVF.
“Going through a huge life moment like that, it does bond you,” he said at the time. “It puts you on this different level of relationship — it’s beyond being in love with him; you’re this partner now, and you’re creating this life that now it’s no longer about yourselves, it’s no longer about you as a couple. It’s about someone else.”
He added: “That selflessness — I can’t wait to feel what that feels like.”