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Lamar Jackson orders bidet company cashing in on 'cramping' saga to cease and desist

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Lamar Jackson missed a chunk of Monday’s thriller against the Cleveland Browns with cramps.

The internet was convinced he left the field for a bathroom emergency. Jokes were had. Aplenty.

A bidet company sought to seize the opportunity. Tushy Bidet, a personal hygiene company with a — ahem — cheeky sense of humor, sent the Baltimore Ravens quarterback a letter with a generous offer of a free bidet to “to give your butt the clean it deserves.”

Tushy also blasted the letter littered with poop puns to members of the media in a ploy to gain publicity.

Well, it worked. Thanks in part to a little help from Jackson and his legal team.

Baltimore Ravens quarterback Lamar Jackson looks up as he leaves the field after an NFL football game against the Cleveland Browns, Monday, Dec. 14, 2020, in Cleveland. The Ravens won 47-42. (AP Photo/Ron Schwane)
Lamar Jackson appears uninterested in poop jokes becoming his brand. (AP Photo/Ron Schwane)

Jackson tells Tushy to cease and desist

While Jackson embraced the jokes Monday, he’s not interested in toilet humor being his brand. Especially considering that he denied that his absence had anything to do with a bathroom break.

His lawyers sent a cease and desist order to Tushy on Wednesday demanding that they stop using his name to promote their product.

“We recently became aware that Tushy, Inc (“Tushy”) has been unlawfully using our client’s name, trademarked name, image and likeness seeking to take commercial advantage of our client’s renown notoriety as an NFL superstar and NFL MVP,” the letter reads. “Your attempt to use our client’s name to promote your products, including bidets, must immediately cease and desist.”

The two-page letter from Ritter Chusid, LLP then went on to demand compensation with a threat of legal action if Tushy doesn’t comply.

“Please contact the undersigned to confirm your compliance with the foregoing demands and to discuss acceptable compensation for the severe harm that your actions have caused our client including, without limitation, the cost of our enforcement efforts.”

Jackson is ready to move on from this chapter in his life. Even if his legal action ensures that the story lives on for at least one more day.

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