Kristen Wiig Reflects on "Isolating" IVF Journey and Fertility Struggle
Kristen Wiig is eight months into the role of a lifetime: motherhood.
In January, the Bridesmaids actress and fiancé Avi Rothman quietly welcomed twins via surrogate. While the private pair initially managed to keep their kids out of the public eye, that all changed in late spring when Wiig and Rothman were photographed out with their newborn babies. Now, in a rare interview about her personal life, Wiig has opened up about her journey to motherhood.
"We've sort of been quarantining since January because of the babies. We're nesting, and we're tired," Wiig recently shared with InStyle. "Having two 9-month-olds is a lot! But they're growing, and I can't wait to see them every morning. It's not all just lying around and smiling at babies, though. It's overwhelming to think about everyone else who's struggling, and it's hard to be good knowing that."
Wiig went on to describe her journey as a "very long road" that included IVF.
"We tried to keep the [surrogacy] process private for as long as possible, because it is a very private thing," the 46-year-old told the outlet. "Unfortunately, we were photographed with them—and, well, it's out there! As private as I am and as sacred as this all is, what helped me was reading about other women who went through it and talking to those who have gone through IVF and fertility stuff. It can be the most isolating experience. But I'm trying to find that space where I can keep my privacy and also be there for someone else who may be going through it."
Wiig explained that she and Rothman have been together for five years, noting that three of those years were spent "in an IVF haze."
"Emotionally, spiritually, and medically, it was probably the most difficult time in my life," she shared. "I wasn't myself. There are so many emotions that go with it—you're always waiting by the phone and getting test results, and it was just bad news after bad news. Occasionally there would be a good month, but then it was just more bad news. There was a lot of stress and heartache."
"It was a long f--king time," the SNL star continued. "It got to the point where I just kind of stopped talking about it entirely, because I would get sad whenever someone asked. It was just part of my life. I gave myself shots in airplane bathrooms and at restaurants—and those shots are no joke."
Wiig also noted that when she would talk about her IVF journey, she would meet others who were going through the process as well. As she explained, "It's like this underground community that's talked about but not talked about."
The actress also recalled, "I remember when our doctor mentioned going other routes, and I was just like, 'Nope. Don't ever bring that up again. I'm getting pregnant. I'm doing this.' I finally realized that I just needed help. And, thank God, we found the most amazing surrogate."
Looking back at the surrogacy process, Wiig said "so many things were bittersweet," telling the publication, "I was over the moon feeling them kick for the first time, but then I would get in my head and ask myself all these questions, like, 'Why couldn't I do this?' At the same time I would tell myself it didn't matter. She was giving us the greatest gift, and I just wanted them to get here!"
Wiig added, "Overall it was a very beautiful thing, and now that I'm on the other side, I wouldn't have had it any other way."
The September issue of InStyle, available on newsstands, on Amazon, and for digital download Aug. 21.
