On Tuesday’s episode of her podcast Down to Date, Long, 27, opened up about their split and whether or not the former couple still keep in touch.
“I did not see it coming,” Long explained to her guest and good friend Rachael Kevin. “Every relationship has issues, but I feel like — with Joe and I — we were best friends. Everything was fun, we were getting a dog together. We had just moved in.”
Long explained that despite being blindsided “there’s still a lot of love and respect for each other.”
Long, who previously revealed their reason for calling it quits was because of Amabile’s decision to move back to Chicago, echoed those sentiments on the podcast, adding that Amabile, 32, was just not happy in Los Angeles.
“Ultimately what happened was that Joe felt like he would have a better life in Chicago,” Long said. “He also missed his friends and family.”
Long explained that prior to their split, she and Amabile had discussed his desire to leave California, and she had told him that she didn’t see Chicago in her future.
“Prior to signing the lease and moving in together, I had told him moving to Chicago wasn’t something that I wanted,” Long, who is originally from Los Angeles, said.
“I love being around my friends and family — Joe didn’t have that,” Long continued.
“Before we went public, we talked about [the breakup],” Long said, adding that they decided “because of where we ultimately want to end of being in our future, we can’t be together. It was sort of a mutual thing after he decided to move to Chicago.”
Deep down, Long shared that she thought Amabile would decide to stay in California. However, she harbors no ill will toward Amabile and the two still talk almost every day.
“I don’t want to be angry. He wasn’t happy. He did try,” Long said.
“For me, I built this podcast here, I have so much beyond just family here. At this point in my life, I wasn’t ready to leave everything that I had built,” Long explained.
Although she’s come to terms with the split, Long admitted that she thought she and Amabile were in it for the long haul.
“I thought Joe and I were going to literally be married. If anyone knows me, I’m not the person that plans my wedding and I was literally doing that with Joe,” Long said.
Long also revealed that being with Amabile has helped her get a better idea of what she wants in her next relationship.
“Something weird about ending something with someone that you thought you were going to marry [is] you almost feel like you have such a better idea of what you’re looking for,” Long added.
Amabile and Long announced their split in January after over a year of dating in a joint statement.
“We have decided mutually to go our separate ways. Joe has made the decision to move back to Chicago while Kendall will be remaining in her hometown of Los Angeles,” Long and Amabile told BachelorNation.com. “Our family and friends have always been an extremely important element to who we are as people. We can’t imagine continuing our lives without them closer, especially when thinking of starting a family of our own one day. We both respect each others’ decision and still have a great deal of love for each other. We appreciate all the love and support everyone has given us throughout our relationship.”
They started seeing each other on Bachelor in Paradise season 5.
Despite only being on The Bachelorette for one episode, Amabile earned himself a spot in Mexico on that summer’s installment of Bachelor in Paradise. He quickly fell for Long, who appeared on Arie Luyendyk Jr.’s season of The Bachelor, but the taxidermy enthusiast also had feelings for Leo Dottavio.
Though Amabile and Long didn’t leave the beach together, they revealed during the reunion episode that they got back together after filming and continued to date.
Amabile went on to compete on Dancing with the Stars season 27, where Long was often seen in the audience cheering on her boyfriend. She then joined him on the nationwide tour that followed the fall 2018 season. And in April, Long revealed that the two planned to move in together in Los Angeles.
“Just signed the lease to our new place in West Hollywood and couldn’t be more excited to start building a lil life together with this cutie,” Long wrote on Instagram on April 26.