Kamala Harris Shares the Marriage Advice She Gave Stepson Cole Emhoff (Exclusive)

Among the vice president’s words of wisdom for the newlywed was that every day, he and wife Greenley Littlejohn should “find some way to check in ... and say ‘I love you’”

Vice President Kamala Harris recently stepped into a very personal role: officiant at her stepson’s wedding.

On Oct. 14 in Los Angeles, Harris, 59, officiated the vows between her stepson Cole Emhoff and Greenley Littlejohn, both 28. (Cole’s dad is second gentleman Doug Emhoff.)

“It meant so much for so many reasons,” Harris — who is known as “Momala” to Cole and stepdaughter Ella, 24 — tells PEOPLE of officiating the wedding. “It was so wonderful that the kids asked me to do it," says the Vice President, who wore a Dior dress for the occasion. "For us, we think of marriage as being not just between these two people, but the coming together of families. So it was very much with that spirit that we all participated.”

Related: Kamala Harris on Her Marriage, What Keeps Her Up at Night and the Beyoncé Song She Calls Her Anthem (Exclusive)

Harris, who has been married to Emhoff, 59, for nine years, adds, “I love my husband. I love our marriage. I want for those two [Cole and Greenley] to have a loving marriage where they are best friends and they know that it’s not just them against the world, that our family supports them. That the community of people that came together at the wedding supports [them].”

Harris also shared the advice she gave the newlyweds.

"There were a couple of pieces," she says. "One of them was, 'Pay attention to your marriage. Pay attention to it and be purposeful and intentional about nurturing it.'"

Additionally, she says, “I gave them a piece of advice, which is that at the end of every day, find some way to check in, no matter how tired you are or how many miles apart you may be, even if it’s just at the end of the day, and say ‘I love you.’”

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It’s something she and Emhoff practice daily, with both morning and evening “check-ins.”

“She’s an amazing wife, loving to me,” Emhoff, who teaches at Georgetown Law, tells PEOPLE. “She focuses on me as much as I focus on her. Maybe I’m a little more public about it."

He continues: "Behind the scenes she’s just a wonderful, caring, loving wife and great mom, auntie, friend. She loves to laugh, which is a good thing. She loves to cook, she loves music. And so she’s just someone who’s a great partner in every sense of the word.”

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