Justin Bieber's Ridiculous Pants: A Case Study

Justin Bieber eating fresh — and wearing weird purple hosiery — in NYC this week (Splash News)

I’m obsessed with Justin Bieber’s bottom.

To clarify — not his actual backside, which we saw plenty of this summer, but what he wears in public to cover it up. This week it was basketball shorts (fine) with what appeared to be colorful tights underneath it (huh?). The temperature that day? A chilly 89 degrees — perfect weather for layering, obviously.

Related: Justin Bieber’s Most Awkward Shirtless Moments

What Bieber puts on his bottom has always consumed a little too much of my brain space. The drop-crotch pants era was especially captivating — mostly because I worried the “What Do You Mean?” singer, 21, would hurt himself performing in the droopy drawers. This summer was more about what he wasn’t wearing on his backside. A photo of his bare butt was only on Instagram briefly, but it lives on in the hearts and minds of teen girls everywhere. (It also lives on in Yahoo Image Search.)

Because Bieber’s bottom has been as entertaining as his songs through the years, let’s look back at his pant preferences through the years, shall we?

When the Canadian crooner was starting out, he was just a YouTube star who wore normal pants and lots of flannel. Back then, it was all about the hair.

Bieber in 2009 (Getty Images)

Biebs really liked white pants though. He’d wear them year round, on stage and off.

Bieber in 2010 and 2011 (Getty Images)

His riskiest fashion moves? Accessorizing with stuffed animals or puff balls. Crazy, crazy, crazy!

Bieber in early 2012 (Getty Images)

By June 2012, Bieber had discovered drop-crotch pants. Dun dun dunnnnn. Maybe Selena Gomez was a fan? (Either way, we’re sure she doesn’t want the credit.)

Bieber in mid-2012 (Getty Images)

He even wore them in his fave color. Again, that would be white. Here he is slaying the ladies at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show.

Bieber in late 2012 (Getty Images)

Some of them were so low they looked dangerous — as if he’d trip over them while swaying his hips during a performance of “Boyfriend” and end up in a cast. Or that he was smuggling something in there — like his monkey. (We miss you, Mally!)

Bieber in December 2012 (Getty Images)

A rear view. Because.

Bieber in June 2013 (Getty Images)

He had issues keeping them up though.

Bieber in October 2013 (Getty Images)

On occasion, he’d also wear droopy shorts. Maybe to store eggs in case an emergency attack was necessary? Or to wipe off remnants of off-target loogies?

Bieber in April 2014 (Getty Images)

In the summer of 2014, Bieber became the face of Calvin Klein undies. He started showing more of his buns in public.

Bieber on vacation in August 2014 (Getty Images)

At Fashion Rocks last year, he skipped bottoms altogether.

Bieber in September 2014 (Getty Images)

Things looked promising in early 2015 at his Comedy Central roast. He turned up looking dapper in hopes of projecting a more mature image. But it was short-lived.

Bieber in March (Getty Images)

Soon after, he was back to weird pants. Like this dress and leggings-like ensemble that all the cool kids (aren’t) wearing.

Bieber in May and August (Getty Images)

And leather shorts. In August. Not at all sticky or uncomfortable.

Bieber in August (AKM-GSI)

Now, it’s shorts and tights. Or shorts and socks. Or something very… Biebery.

Bieber in September (Splash News)

Well, I guess we should just be thankful that he’s wearing anything at all.