While chatting about how they manage to prioritize each other’s sexual needs, Hough revealed that it hasn’t always been smooth sailing for the couple, who celebrated their two-year wedding anniversary on Monday, confessing that they’ve sought out professional help to keep their relationship thriving.
“A lot of people don’t know even what they want,” Hough pointed out. “My curiosity has saved my life and honestly saved our relationship many times because we’ve been curious about like, ‘Hey, something doesn’t feel right. Instead of just accepting it for how it is, let’s look into something.””
The professional dancer went on to explain how she discovered sex educator Jaiya online who gives couples tests to help determine their “erotic blueprints” and how sexually compatible they are.
“When I took the test, I realized that there were certain things that gave me connection and intimacy that were different than what gave Brooks connection and intimacy,” Hough explained.
“By almost learning each other’s language — sort of like love languages — it was almost like a menu of how we could please each other sexually, but also intimately,” she continued, noting that her idea of intimacy is about “just wanting to be seen.”
“We go to dinner a lot of the time and dinner for Brooks is great because he’s getting fed, he’s got me there, whatever it might be,” she added. “Dinner to me means I want eye contact and I would really appreciate you, maybe touching my hand at some point.”
While Hough values a physical connection, Laich confessed that he’s more about visuals when it comes to feeling intimate. “When you put lingerie on, I am f— fired up,” he admitted to his wife. “I love it.”
Though the AGT judge acknowledged that sex and foreplay is certainly a big part of intimacy, Hough said the word has come to mean so much more to her since she met Laich, 36.
“Honestly, when I think of the word intimacy … I think it’s one of the most sacred things you can have between a partnership. I think it’s what separates friendship and lovers, and I think that most people do think about sex when they think of intimacy, but when I think about intimacy, I think of presence,” she explained. “I think of absolute, complete and utter connection, when we are two people connecting and then we actually become one person.”
“I can have chemistry and connection, but my intimacy with Brooks is because he challenges me, and he sees me for exactly who I am and accepts me for the fact that I can have chemistry and connection with a lot of people, but I choose him every day,” she added. “I think that is also really sacred, and that’s why we have an intimate relationship. I don’t have that kind of intimacy with a lot of connections that I make throughout my life.”
In addition to opening up about intimacy, the couple also celebrated two years of wedded bliss on Monday with touching Instagram posts.
“Words cannot express how grateful I am to have you in my life, and how happy you have made me. You have brought out the best in me, and helped me become the man I always hoped to be,” Laich wrote alongside a photo of the couple sharing a kiss on their wedding day.
“You are kind, gentle, compassionate, and loving. You are the greatest joy in my life, and I love you with all my heart,” he continued. “Thank you for being you, and choosing me everyday to share your life with!”
Hough, meanwhile, posted a breathtaking montage from their wedding day and wrote her hubby a sweet message.
“Wish we could relive our wedding weekend over and over and over again. Thank you @brookslaich for 2 years of pure magic, laughter, silliness, LOVE, and countless adventures!” she wrote. “I wake up every day feeling so lucky for your love. I can’t wait to take on the rest of life with you, and if it’s anything like these past 2 years then I know it will be filled with joy, intimacy and deep connection. I love you. ❤️”
Hough and Laich’s anniversary comes just weeks after they revealed Hough began the IVF process shortly before she turned 30 last July.
“Knowing she has endometriosis, it could potentially make things challenging in the future to conceive naturally,” Laich told PEOPLE of their decision to start IVF. “That was just a looking at the big picture and what we want as a family.”
The professional dancer also froze some of her eggs last year, and “the commitment that she made to us having a family is something I’ll never forget,” he added.
While the athlete acknowledged going through IVF is usually a “private” experience, he said he and Hough want to fight the stigma that may come with fertility issues by speaking out.
“The outpouring has been incredible,” he said of the support they’ve received since going public with their own journey. “Text messages from friends that I didn’t even know were considering it, messages on Twitter and Facebook, Instagram, people thanking us for opening up about that. I just hope it helps people.”