The late-night host began by asking his audience who flew from out of town to come see his show, eliciting an unsurprisingly loud uproar from the crowd.
“I’m glad none of you were yanked off the plane,” he continued as he transitioned into a breakdown of what exactly happened in the United Airlines incident. Kimmel explained that United employees chose four passengers to remove from the flight since it was overbooked, and the airline needed to give seats to its employees. One man refused to leave, saying he was a doctor and needed to get to the hospital to attend to his patients in the morning. He was forcibly dragged out of the plane.
After showing the video his audience — which was recorded by multiple passengers via cell-phone cameras — a mix of shock and laughter emerged from the crowd.
“It’s interesting to see who laughs at that,” Kimmel responded. “That’s how my mother used to get me out of bed to go to school in the morning,” he added.
Kimmel later went on to show the audience the statement released by the CEO of United in response to the incident. “This is an upsetting event to all of us here at United,” the statement reads. “I apologize for having to re-accommodate these customers.”
Kimmel chose to highlight the word “re-accommodate” in the statement. “Just like we re-accommodated El Chapo out of Mexico,” he joked.
On a more serious note, Kimmel commented on the irresponsibility of the airline overall, adding that the statement is “sanitized, say-nothing, take-no-responsibility, corporate-BS speak.”
To wrap up his number on the incident, Kimmel presented a mock safety video that he suggested United Airlines use.
“We’re United Airlines. You do what we say when we say, and there won’t be a problem, capiche?,” a smiling flight attendant says. “If we say you fly, you fly. If not, tough s—. Give us a problem and we’ll drag your a– off the plane, and if you resist, we’ll beat you so badly you’ll be using your own face as a flotation device.”
The flight attendant finishes her speech with her fists wielding brass knuckles, and the gag ad is equipped with a new slogan: “United: F— you.”
Watch the video below: