Jessie J Revealed The Details Of Her 2021 Miscarriage And How The Experience Made Her "Love Myself Deeper"
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In November of last year, Jessie J revealed that she had suffered a miscarriage.
On a recent episode of the The Diary of a CEO podcast, the singer opened up about finding out she'd miscarried, and the process of grief she underwent afterward.
In particular, Jessie discussed how she found out she had miscarried the day before a concert in Los Angeles.
"I had two scans on the same day, and within the first scan and the second scan, the baby had passed," she explained.
Jessie said that she had scheduled a doctor's visit after waking up one morning and thinking, Oh, I don't feel right.
"I still had very intense nausea, [but] I just knew something wasn't the same."
After the first scan, doctors told Jessie that the baby had a low heartbeat and a "ring" that "often means that the baby will have some sort of disability or deformity."
Later in the day, Jessie saw another doctor to receive a second opinion, which is when she found out that the baby had passed on.
Before her concert the following day, Jessie revealed the news of her miscarriage in a since-deleted Instagram post. "I posted it because I didn't have anyone to break on," she recalled. "I didn't have anyone to just fall apart on, and that's what I needed — that's what I wanted."
In the interview, she also described how she felt after the concert. "I got in the car after the show by myself, and I got home, and I opened my front door, and I closed the door. I fell to my knees," she said.
"When I got home that night and I lay there, I've never felt so lonely in my life... I just remember laying there, knowing it was still there, but it wasn't there. That went on for over a week."
Jessie also said that she believes the reason why she miscarried is because "I wasn't supposed to do it alone."
"I'm supposed to find someone that wants this as much as I do," she said. "I'm grateful that I got to experience being pregnant... It's opened the door for me to love myself deeper."
"I'm still processing the whole thing. I have moments of intense sadness and grief, but I also have moments of excitement knowing that I won't do it alone."
