Jeremy Renner details snowcat accident in first TV interview: 'It's my mistake and I paid for it'

Jeremy Renner is detailing his recovery from the accident that nearly took his life, after a snowcat crushed him in January.

The "Mayor of Kingstown" actor talked with ABC News' Diane Sawyer while sitting in a wheelchair and recalled the details of his New Year's Day, which was meant to be a fun day of skiing with his family and devolved into several broken bones and a weeks-long hospitalization.

"If I was there on my own it would've been a horrible way to die, and surely it would have (killed me)," Renner said in the special interview aired Thursday.

The actor transitioned from the hospital bed to wheelchair to walker and is now able to use a cane as he recovers at home in Los Angeles.

Renner's family, the neighbors who ran out to help and doctors shared the details of the accident that changed the 52-year-old actor's life. Here are the highlights from his first TV interview since that January day.

Jeremy Renner remembers 'seeing stars' after the snow plow crushed him

Renner suffered blunt chest trauma and orthopedic injuries in the snow plow accident near his home in Nevada, after attempting to help his nephew with a car issue. The Marvel star tried to pull his nephew's car from being stuck in the snow by using his more than 14,000-pound snow plow. The actor craned his body out of the large vehicle to check on his nephew, without setting the parking brake, and with a missed step fell under the tracks of the moving vehicle.

"You should be inside the vehicle when you're operating it. It's kinda like driving car with your foot outside the car," Renner said. "It's my mistake and I paid for it."

The accident resulted in more than 30 broken bones and a collapsed lung among other injuries.

"It felt like someone took the wind out of you," Renner said. "I could see my eye with my other eye. I just remember seeing stars and a tar line in my other eye."

Neighbors called 9-1-1, thought they saw Renner 'pass away'

Renner's nephew didn't have his cell phone so he ran to grab nearby neighbors, Rich Kovach and his partner Barb Fletcher, during the emergency. 

"He was just in such pain, there was so much blood in the snow," Kovach said, adding that he remembers seeing severe head injuries. "His eye looked like it had been pushed out."

During clips of the 9-1-1 call, Renner could be heard moaning in the background.

"It was a horrible sound, just literally watching somebody die in front of you," Fletcher said. "At one point he just got a clammy feel to him and he turned this gray, green color and I feel in my heart that I lost him for a second."

"I really feel he did pass away for a couple of seconds," she added.

Renner says Kovach, Fletcher and his nephew "kept him alive."

Renner airlifted to hospital, wrote last words to family from bed

Paramedics and firemen rushed to the scene and got him into the ambulance in "less than five minutes," according to nurse Jeff Rocky.

"Because his chest wall was so unstable and his breathing was so labored ... we inserted needles into his chest," Rocky said. He was later airlifted to a nearby hospital where he was admitted and marked as a red-level trauma patient.

"I remember being intubated, I got handcuffed in restraints," Renner said.

His sister Kym Renner was the first to the hospital and says seeing her brother was one of the "scariest things" ever.

Renner was unable to speak while intubated but communicated to his family through sign language, signing "I'm sorry" to his family and later he drafted a note on his phone once he was able.

"I'm writing down notes in my phone, last words to my family," Renner recalled in tears. "Don't let me live on tubes or on machines and if my existence going to be on drugs or painkillers, just let me go now."

Renner reveals he's 'triggered by the accident,' but refuses to be 'haunted'

Those around Renner are amazed by his recovery in four months, yet the actor is still "relearning to speak again" with a broken jaw that is being held together with screws and rubber bands.

"I'm triggered by the accident. Last night I didn't sleep ... knowing I was going to have to talk about it today," Renner told Sawyer, but says he'd "do it again" and has no regrets.

Renner said he refuses for the accident to be a trauma and negative experience.

"I shift the narrative of being victimized, of making a mistake or anything else. I refuse to be haunted by that memory that way," he said.

Renner is expected to make his first red carpet appearance April 11 for the Los Angeles premiere of his Disney+ four-part series, "Rennervations." The show follows Renner as he renovates and recycles large vehicles to serve communities as mobile rec centers and mobile music studios. The series was filmed before the incident.

More on Renner's recovery

• 'Very lucky that my uncle is alive': Jeremy Renner shares adorable note from nephew after snowcat accident

• 'Working on me': Jeremy Renner shares update amid recovery from snowplow accident

• Video: Jeremy Renner walks on treadmill months after snowcat accident

• 'He cares about everybody': Jeremy Renner sent co-star funny, 'profane' video after accident

• More: Jeremy Renner in a wheelchair, 'laughing' with friends after snowcat accident, Evangeline Lilly say

This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Jeremy Renner's Diane Sawyer interview: His words on the accident