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Jeffree Star has announced that he and longtime boyfriend Nathan Schwandt have split.
In an emotional YouTube video uploaded on Saturday, titled “We Broke Up,” the makeup mogul, 34, revealed that the pair had called it quits “a few weeks ago,” after dating for five years.
“There’s no easy way to say this,” Star said. “We’re both in a state of shock. I’m devastated. I’m so sad.”
“I feel like I owe you all an explanation because Nathan and I have grown with each other in front of all of you and I can’t believe he’s not here right now. But I do want to share what’s been going on,” Star continued, before making it clear that he still has nothing but love for Schwandt.
“I’m grateful for him, and I’ll be grateful until the day I die, because this was the only man that was ever confident enough to love me publicly, to love me for me fully, all my flaws, no makeup waking up in bed to full-on — he never cared about any of it, he just loved me for me,” the makeup mogul said.
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Making it clear that there was no “crazy” drama surrounding their decision to split, Star explained that a number of losses — including the death of two of their dogs last year — as well as the demanding nature of their lifestyle, took a toll on their mental health.
“We haven’t processed our dogs fully because this lifestyle is so crazy and we’re always on to the next thing,” he explained. “We were both so busy being there for each other that we forgot to be here for ourselves, and that’s what 2020 is — focusing on ourselves.”
“Me and Nathan will be friends forever, I will always have love for him. Are we in love with each other? No, but we love each other and he will always be in my life,” he added.
Another factor which led to their split was that while Star has been in the public eye for years, making a name for himself on MySpace before starting his own makeup brand and YouTube channel, Schwandt never had any desire for the spotlight, although he has appeared in many of Star’s videos over the years — including a video uploaded earlier this year, which showed the pair moving into a new house.
“He never wanted to be famous, he never wanted to be in the spotlight, he never wanted attention, but he loved and believed in everything i was doing and was a part of it because I asked him to,” Star explained. “My life is so public and I think it just got to a breaking point where it just wasn’t healthy.”
Rumors that the pair’s relationship was fake were also challenging for Schwandt.
“I have really thick skin, I can take a lot, but I think it really wears you down when you’re in love with someone and all you hear is he’s with you for the money, he’s this, he’s that,” Star continued. “He met me when I had nothing and he never changed and that’s what I loved the most is he stayed true to who he was.”
As the 17-minute long video came to a close, Starr thanked his fans and followers, saying he felt “ready for this new chapter, I think.”
“I can’t wait to get back to doing what I love and creating and Jeffree Star Cosmetics has so many amazing things to look forward to this year — I’m just so excited. Even though I’m so sad I’m ready to get back to work.”
In a Tweet posted later in the afternoon, he added: “The hardest part has been waking up and he’s not laying next to me anymore.. But I’m a tough bitch and 2020 is going to be my year.”
Breakup rumors surrounding Star and Schwandt, who began dating after hitting it off on Instagram, increased in the days before Star’s announcement.
“My dogs always make me smile when I’m down,” Star wrote in a cryptic post on Jan. 4, shortly before it was also announced that Star had pulled out of an upcoming beauty tour for “unforeseen personal reasons.”
Fans also noticed that Star had taken out the line “wifey of Nathan” from his Instagram bio, and that several items pertaining to Schwandt appeared to have been removed, or were no longer in stock, on the Jeffree Star Cosmetics website.