James Bay Writes from a 'Vulnerable' Place and Taps Into What's Behind His 'Smiling Face' in Leap
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James Bay
James Bay is opening up about his struggle with mental health for the first time on his new record — and reveals why sharing it with the world is such a turning point for a private musician like himself.
Discussing his latest studio album Leap — which dropped on Friday — the British singer, 31, tells PEOPLE that it represents a sense of "hope" and marks the first time he truly tapped into his feelings by putting them on paper. But why now? He felt an awakening after a dark year in 2019 — one that from the outside may have made him look like he was on top of the world.
"In 2019 through some anxiety and a bunch of insecurity and some feeling of imposter syndrome, I was really just struggling under the surface," the "Move Together" singer tells PEOPLE. "Every day I'd go out and I'd smile and make it look great and I'd play the show and it would be great, but I didn't know how to process the things I was feeling deeper."
He continues, "It can be so heavy, it can weigh so heavy to smile through when you feel so different inside. And this isn't all about just letting my sadness out there, it's just about being a little bit more real."
Julian Braod
Eventually, Bay says he found a way to make each song on Leap "reflect that time." Meanwhile, the name derives from a John Burroughs quote which inspired him to take that leap of faith. "Leap and the net will appear," the quote states. But after 10 years of working as a recording artist, Bay says it doesn't get any easier.
"I love to perform, I love to write, I love to create and I love to entertain. It's a huge part of my makeup, but it takes over sometimes too much. And to the point that I'm feeling completely different things underneath a big smiling face," the "Let It Go" singer tells PEOPLE. "I've struggled with that in the past and I might struggle with it again, but finding a way to write from a more vulnerable place than I have before has helped me feel a little bit lighter."
He added, "I didn't know how to go forward as a person, as an artist. It was a low, and I know that life is full of lows and it's full of highs and this kind of thing that I was going through in 2019, I've made it through at this point. I feel like I'm in a better place, but I know I will go through it again because that's just how things go."
Most importantly, during this songwriting process, he recognized the people that keep his "head above water" — leading him to write some of his most "uplifting" songs to date.
And though many come to mind when he reflects on those people, he says the most important is his girlfriend Lucy — who knew him long before the fame.
"She knows me better than anybody," he says. "She knows how to sometimes carry a weight that I might be carrying, but she also knows how to get involved and intercept in the darker moments."
"Historically, I think I can recognize that and then just stay in my dark place. This time I found a way to, as I was writing, really recognize and celebrate how incredibly important that is for me and she is to me. It's the first time I've ever really done that," he adds of his song "One Life" which is featured on the album. "There's such a vulnerability that comes with writing a song that basically might say, 'I need you, thank you, I love you.' "
James Bay
He continues, "It still surprises me how good it feels. It's not as terrifying as I thought it might be to reveal that degree of vulnerability."
When he first released the song in May, he dedicated a sweet message to her on social media, writing that it was a "realization that for all the somethings I chase after, it's actually just a someone that I really need."
But revealing that vulnerable side of himself also meant accepting that as a male, expressing his feelings shouldn't be taboo.
"It can be quite daunting to consider how far my words might go. We've come a long way in recent years with talking about our mental health and it's very important," the musician says. "That's pretty groundbreaking stuff in its way, but I do feel from a male perspective — historically, it's been hard for lots of people to talk about their inner struggles and emotions. [And] it's always been to the point of a cliché, not okay for men to talk."
Another special part of the album is the letter in the sleeve notes Bay wrote to his 8-month-old daughter Ada, whom he shares with Lucy and he says has been an "enormous" part of his life.
James Bay/Instagram
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"Album sleeve notes are most often where an artist thanks all the people who helped make the album. I want to thank all those people for all their help," the message reads, in part. "But I really want to thank you. You came along and made me believe I can do anything, you've given me the confidence to leap again."
And though most of the album was written before her birth, he says, "My experience even in these first eight months as a dad has been so strong, so powerful, that I definitely wanted to recognize her in the timeframe of this album's creation and release."
Within those eight months, Bay says he really lives "day-by-day" and "however patient I thought I was, you learn that 10 times more in the first 10 minutes."
Leap is out now.
