Holiday parties: Do's, don't's on proper etiquette

John Oliva, Corpus Christi Caller Times
·5 min read

Holiday parties have started and maybe you're unsure if you should bring an appetizer or a plus one.

Proper etiquette is of major importance for get-togethers.

Here's a guide to the do’s and don’ts of what to do at all holiday parties you may attend this winter season.

Do: Bring the host a gift

The host is inviting people inside their home, and it could be anywhere from up to 20+ friends and family members.

A cute ornament, a small plant, a festive wreath or an aromatic candle is a great way to show appreciation for them. Be sure it is wrapped up or in a cute gift bag.

If you want to be a bit fancier, a bottle of wine is always great for those who consume alcohol. But make sure it's not too expensive −or too cheap.

Don't: Bring pungent, messy or bizarre dishes

Traditions are an important part of the holiday season, but if your tradition includes a casserole with three heads of garlic, a spiced fish dish or extra-sloppy pulled pork ― you might want to save it for a meal at your own house.

If the host requests people to bring over a dish, make sure it's nothing that will have guests leave with bad breath or stains on their clothes.

Do: Bring talking points

Talking may not be your strong suit, but mingling with strangers at a holiday party is a common occurrence.

If your mind goes blank when it's your turn to start a convo, it's best to have a Rolodex of topics ready in your head.

Some simple ideas include upcoming vacations, New Year's resolutions, movies in theaters or your favorite moment of 2023.

Don't: Bring storage containers

Never expect to leave a party with anything − it's bad etiquette.

So, having storage containers stashed away in your vehicle is pretty tacky.

If the host has extra food, and if the host allows people to take some home, then you can take it home. Do not suggest to the host that you can take it home.

Do: Offer to help

If you feel like you're standing alone while others are chit-chatting away, and don't want to leave just yet, go ask the host if they could use an extra set of hands.

Offer to help wash some dishes, refill the ice bucket or set up some more appetizer plates.

As well, offer to help clean up near the end of the party. The host will greatly appreciate it.

Don't: Arrive early or very late

Showing up early might seem like it's a polite thing to do, but not to a party. Save that punctuality for work.

Show up a little after the party has started, but no more than an hour late. Being "fashionably late" is fashionably rude, and your host and friends are most likely bad-mouthing you.

As well, leave before the party starts winding down. Being the last one at the party looks a bit desperate, unless you're best friends with the host.

Do: Ask if you can bring anything

Hosts might decline, but it's always good etiquette to ask them if you can bring anything. That's including dishes, drinks or even ice.

If they accept, ask what they recommend you bring and what they need. Just because they say you can bring something, that doesn't mean you choose. It is their party and their home, so be respectful.

Don't: Bring an uninvited plus one

The holiday party host has put a lot of thought into planning the shindig, and that's including the number of guests they plan to have.

Do not bring someone unexpectedly. That includes the little ones.

If you want to bring someone, always run it by the host and make sure they agree to it.

Do: Dress appropriately

If a family member is throwing a holiday party, chances are the dress code is pretty casual.

But if it's a Christmas cocktail party, or even a work holiday party, be sure to check on the dress code. You might need to find a nice cocktail dress or sharp button-up shirt.

Always check with the host on the dress code before arriving overdressed or underdressed.
Always check with the host on the dress code before arriving overdressed or underdressed.

If your host doesn't get back to you in time, use common sense and dress on the nicer side. Nothing too formal though; the host isn't expecting you to come in a ballgown or tuxedo.

Don't: Bring up gossip, divisive conversation or personal topics

Do not be that person at the holiday party by making things awkward.

It's natural for conversations to veer off into controversial territory. If it comes down to that, quickly change the subject and steer clear of it.

Refrain from talking about politics, religion, money, health issues or work gossip. It's never a fun time and the host will most likely ask you to leave immediately.

Do: RSVP

The host might not put it on the invitation, but when you get yours it is always nice to send a response letting them know if you will be in attendance or not.

This allows the host to make the proper preparations for their holiday party.

Don't: Get drunk

Nearly every holiday party you plan to attend this month will serve alcohol, but drinking too much could be a huge mistake for yourself.

An open bar might sound like heaven, but pace yourself.

Drinking at holiday parties are a common occurrence, but that doesn't mean you need to get sloppy and drunk.
Drinking at holiday parties are a common occurrence, but that doesn't mean you need to get sloppy and drunk.

It's best to start off with something with a low APV%, alcohol per volume. Opt for a wine spritzer instead of a glass of wine.

Be sure to eat beforehand and while your drink. Remember to drink responsibly.

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John Oliva covers entertainment and community news in South Texas. Contact him at john.oliva@caller.com or Twitter @johnpoliva.

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This article originally appeared on Corpus Christi Caller Times: Do's, don't's on proper etiquette at holiday parties