The Hills Recap: Thanksgiving Brings Food, Fights and 'Boobs on a Platter'

Andy Swift

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It’s appropriate that Monday’s episode of The Hills: New Beginnings took place at Thanksgiving, because most of the hour was spent feasting on leftover drama. And they barely even bothered to heat it back up first.

As an appetizer, we got a predictably uncomfortable holiday at Spencer at Heidi’s, featuring Stephanie as literally their only dinner guest. And they shushed her when she arrived because Gunner was asleep, so things got off to a solid start. Anyway, Stephanie whispered to them about her fight with Brody, causing Spencer’s face to light up like it was suddenly Christmas morning. This was easily the most cordial conversation Spencer and Stephanie have had all season, which actually shouldn’t be surprising. Of course the secret to repairing the Pratt siblings’ fractured relationship is simply giving them a common enemy. They’re like the Wonder Twins, only not twins. And their only power is drama.

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Then came the main course: Friendsgiving at Frankie’s, where Justin Bobby arrived with a busty Stephanie look-alike as his date. Did I mention that they met on Instagram, and that they’re still figuring out where things are going? That all seems kind of important. Also important was Audrina noting, “This chick is literally serving her boobs on a platter… for everyone.”

Dessert was served in the form of a highly anticipated Stephanie-Audrina showdown, but it wasn’t quite as satisfying as I hoped. Stephanie asked for an apology, but Audrina refused to oblige, adding that Stephanie takes things too far. Honestly, it’s hard to watch these grown women fight over a man-child who’s clearly manipulating them. As always, for someone who claims to hate drama, Justin Bobby is doing the absolute most.

Also worth discussing…

* Confirmed: Mischa will not be playing Ruth the Brothel Worker in whatever indie movie she’s been auditioning for. “I didn’t get it,” she revealed this week. “They’re going with someone musical, I guess?” (In other news, I’ll be spending the next few hours scouring IMDb for answers.)

* As always, the time spent at Brody’s mom’s house was the most interesting part of the episode. That woman seems like a saint.

Your thoughts on this week’s Hills? Drop ’em in a comment below.

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