We’ve finally reached a point in time where miscarriages are something we can openly discuss. Sufferers routinely share their experiences, but that doesn’t make revealing a miscarriage any easier. Doing so requires courage — and when a sufferer shares her story, we owe it to her to listen without judgment.
Unfortunately, that doesn’t always. Hilaria Baldwin, who recently opened up about her own pregnancy loss…and instead of support, the celebrity received some seriously uncalled for hate. And now, Baldwin is defending herself — though, to be perfectly clear, she shouldn’t have to.
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“All of a sudden I started getting negative comments about my miscarriage,” Baldwin wrote on her November 26 Instagram story “‘Attention seeker’, ‘too old’… ‘disgusting’.”
Baldwin, who opened up about her miscarriage in a November 11 Instagram post, went on to (rightfully) criticize the trolls who came for her. “Losing a baby at any stage is hitting rock bottom,” the mother of four wrote. “Rock bottom sucks. But rock bottom is also eye-opening. Because you understand and have experienced true pain. It makes the trolls seem even smaller than they usually are. Because no words they can use can ever compare to what you have lost.”
By criticizing a woman for bravely speaking out about her miscarriage, the trolls aren’t just spreading cruelty — they’re also making other miscarriage sufferers feel shame and hindering the incredible progress we’ve made.
“Those of you who bully women who suffer as I have are bringing a cruelty to the world that is so wrong,” Baldwin wrote to that effect. “You are contributing to feelings of shame, fear, insufferable pain. It is for this reason that I have stepped forward and shared as I have. Not for attention, but because it is my life story and I decided to open up. You think I wanted this??? I have experienced this pain that countless women before and with me have and we should make their…OUR…lives…easier, not more difficult.”
“I feel like it’s making the best out of a bad situation because I feel like it’s an important message, that people are not alone,” Baldwin wrote. “People think [our lives are] all roses and diamonds and all that stuff. I think it’s important to be honest because we’re so much more similar, everybody is, than different.”
There’s no way to lessen the pain of a miscarriage but support can help, and Baldwin adding her voice to the conversation hopefully will empower others to speak out.
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