How I helped pick Tuscaloosa's best restaurant | MARK HUGHES COBB

What can we agree on?

Not political anything, anywhere, anytime.

Dreamland vs. Archibald's? Nope; folks will sink teeth and gnaw until sauce flows like plasma.

How about Dolly Parton? Can we all agree she's cool? How about Prince, Mr. Rogers, and Tracy Chapman returning to charm and cheer everyone at the Grammys, singing her iconic "Fast Car" with a country boy, Luke Combs, who grew up loving that queer person of color's art?

Nope.

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Because I dared point out Combs sang not in harmony, but in unison ― same notes, same register; harmony involves complementary but differing notes that blend to form a new whole ― some seemed ready to burn. Many of my fellow journalists incorrectly wrote "Combs sang in harmony with .... "

Do we have to preface everything with "Meanings matter. Words matter. This isn't intended to offend, but to clarify, because words and meanings .... "?

Sadly so.

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Everyone's terrier-iffically scrappy in the 21st century, when we should be Trekking to higher planes, boldly going forth in jet cars and body-slimming (aided by perfected cuisine) jumpsuits.

Even if we agree Tracy and her avid fan created a beautiful moment, the kind that might help heal, folks still wish to wade in, take shots first, ask questions never. It's wearying.

But explaining's part of the job, so here we go again.

On social media, we carried on a relatively civil food-fight about the best eats in Tuscaloosa a few months back, as I polled our populace for a feature USA Today is compiling, picking some of the finest dining around the country.

Like Highlanders, Tuscaloosa could have only one.

And I'm only one, not even a food specialist. I was hired by the New York Times group as a feature writer, with emphasis on arts and entertainment. But with ailing economies, and subsequent winnowing of staffs, we're all generalists. I'm no exception. In my visions of the (this) future, honestly had no idea I'd be covering more beats than Keith Moon on a bender, at a time when I should be easing on down to squint ahead at retirement's horizon, looming like Deadman's Curve, but for careers.

So how did I arrive at nominating (USA Today, our flagship, made the picks) Urban Bar and Kitchen over Chuck's Fish, River, Central Mesa, Side by Side, Evangeline's, Avenue Pub, Half Shell Oyster House, TuscNY, DePalma's .... ? Or down-home faves such as Nick's in the Sticks, City Cafe, the Waysider, Taco Casa, Rama Jama's, or Druid City Brewing's Ell's Kitchen? Or sterling newer spots such as the Alamite's Forte Cuts and Cocktails?

Wish I could say it's objective, standard for journalists and journalism ― saving arts analyses, criticisms and reviews I used to have time and space to write ― but at some point, you turn your back against a wall and choose.

I read dozens of thoughts, some lengthy, from gastronomes. A few, like Forte, I take at folks' word, as again, I'm not actually a journalist who's paid to eat. Still, over three-plus decades on staff, I've eaten at least a few times at most of those discussed, probably 98% of them. So I added my tastes to the thoughts of readers and, puns always intended, consumers.

As this list will go national, I initially leaned toward places with vivid, all-its-own (often crimson) atmosphere, like those barbecue joints, Nick's, and Rama Jama's.

The pull to go with a comfortable pick felt weighted. Most Dreamland-leaning folks I know acknowledge Archibald's is also great, though Archibald's champions seem less inclined to give the same to Dreamland.

Why re-tell a story everyone knows? Both Dreamland and Archibald's already get featured prominently, among them in Southern Living's 50 bests, so ... why not shine light on the less-seen scene?

This pushed River, Side by Side, Evangeline's, Chuck's, DePalma's, each excellent in their own ways, all worthy, all points of pride for the Druid City. They're the kind of joints we not only dig for ourselves, but serve as places to take visitors, to brag, and say "This is Tuscaloosa. We're not just football. We can — and do — have nice things."

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My heart breaks we can't offer The Globe, Storyville, The Lamplighter, Moon Gate Inn, Kozy's, Epiphany, Cafe Venice, fried chicken from the Cotton Patch (far outta town, near Eutaw, but adopted by Tuscaloosans), Pure Process ice cream, and Ireland's (Everyone who recalls just salivated for steak and biscuits), among others of our dearly departed. We're also no longer in possession, save in memories, of laid-back places that drew my college-student hunger and dwindling dollars, such as Bama-Bino Pizza, Posey's, Kwik Snak, Solomon's, Horne's Barbecue, Pasquale's, or latter incarnations such as 15th Street Diner/Moma Jewell's, El Rincon, Edelweiss, Liberty Cafe, and Maggie's Diner.

Urban Bar and Kitchen not only drew raves from a wider-options list, but on a separate ask about UBK specifically, pulled several dozen fervent responses.

To those thoughts, its relative newness — opened in 2021 by Gary McGee and Grover Ryans, formerly of the Levee in Northport -- the style, flavors and service blending cool and warm, its "This Must Be the Place" slogan, I added my entirely subjective ponderances:

My pal Bill Buchanan introduced me to UBK, insisting it had not only the best gumbo he'd ever sunk a spoon in, but also excelled at everything else. It wasn't the last or only place we dined together, but still I thought: What would Bill, who loved this community, with all its extractions and attractions, so deeply and so well, choose?

Where, if wishes could return our loved ones, would I hope to catch up with him? Where would I want to brag-take Dad, my brothers Scotty and Randy, my first girlfriend Becky?

I hope all readers will dig in to UBK, and the others above.

Salute brave culinary artists who strive in what's known as one of the toughest gigs: serving varied tastes that come together to offer distinctly harmonious progressions.

Mark Hughes Cobb is the editor of Tusk. Reach him at mark.cobb@tuscaloosanews.com.

This article originally appeared on The Tuscaloosa News: How I helped pick Tuscaloosa's best restaurant | MARK HUGHES COBB