Hell (and High Water) Break Loose in Chaotic ‘What We Do in the Shadows’ Ep. 5

Proma Khosla
·3 min read
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What happens if the world finds out about vampires?

“What We Do in the Shadows” Season 5, Episode 5 finally poses that question, and answers with riotous results. “Local News,” written by Sarah Naftalis and directed by Yana Gorskaya, has the vampires thinking they’ve been outed after Nandor (Kayvan Novak) tells a local reporter that he’s centuries old, then promptly runs back to the house to tell everyone about his blunder.

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Each character reacts with what is fundamentally a reasonable response to this threat. Life as they know it is over and they think they’re under attack. Nadja (Natasha Demetrious) dyes her hair, tests an alias, and gets her go-bag; Colin Robinson (Mark Proksch) insists on taking a final stand and booby trapping the house while he prepares for war; Lazslo (Matt Berry) wants to fight back with his mind, crafting a kidnapping plan that definitely has a second step.

What’s genius about all these responses is that they line up entirely with who these characters already are. Nadja would absolutely be simultaneously practical and catastrophist (the detail of dying her dolly’s hair to match is exquisite); despite his love of all things dreary and bureaucratic, Colin Robinson is an absolute savage, and we should never forget it. Lazslo’s instinct to plan and plot feels like an extension of his scientific experiments in Episode 3, an opportunity to flex his perceived intelligence even if he’s running on empty this time (the plan’s elusive Step 2 is a brilliant runner and still kills even on a fourth mention).

It’s also just the classic sitcom misunderstanding dialed up to 110, and it’s delightful — even if the stakes are never high for the audience — the pinnacle of the vampires’ failure to grasp modern verbal and social cues (the humans aren’t exactly astute either; “Nandor DeLaurentiis??”).

Though it’s played for laughs, Guillermo (Harvey Guillén) has a heartbreaking story this episode, one that viewers have pondered ever since it was revealed that he had a living, loving family. He plans to say goodbye to his mother, knowing that while he can sustain human relationships as a vampire, he comes from a long line of vampire killers and can’t put them or himself in that position.

But with immense credit to Gorskaya, Guillén, the writers, and editors, “What We Do in the Shadows” is meticulous about dialing back the sadness any time it grows too strong. There’s Guillermo’s early “It’s actually kind of heavy if you think about it,” delivered phenomenally by Guillén to convey that while his character has clearly fixated on this, he hasn’t grasped the full weight of it. Every time he tries to have the conversation with his mother, there’s an interruption, and when he finally gets through it, she gives him a crucifix that burns his skin. When Guillermo breaks down in the elevator, he also destroys a handrail (while still being burned by his new necklace). His mother also reveals that he’s been doing this for weeks, that he’ll probably have the same conversation again, and her indifferent attitude (“tan curioso”) provides relief instead of subjecting viewers to a painful farewell.

A man in a patterned button-down sweater and glasses, speaking into his cellphone in a kitchen; still from "What We Do in the Shadows"
Harvey Guillén in “What We Do in the Shadows”Russ Martin/FX

In the end, the water main is repaired, the local population hypnotized (or killed), and the vampires protected — without Guillermo’s help. What “Local News” sets up more than anything is a growing divide between Guillermo and the others, one which may help as he continues to develop powers and must evade Nandor’s wrath.

Also, I know this would probably not land with most of the audience, but I would love for these guys to host the news.

Grade: B+

New episodes of “What We Do in the Shadows” premiere Thursdays at 10 p.m. on FX and Fridays on Hulu.

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