“The Golden Bachelor” season finale recap: Happily ever after (again)

Gerry Turner ended his journey down on one knee.

Time for some good news and some bad news, rose lovers. The good news: Tonight on The Golden Bachelor finale, Gerry proposed to the (second) love of his life, and she said yes! The bad news: I may never stop crying for the poor woman he sent home.

Let’s recap!

We begin, as always on finale nights, in the Tealight Candle Thunderdome. Host Jesse Palmer welcomes us and promises a “historic,” “dramatic,” and “emotional” night. More importantly, the Golden Bachelorettes are here!

With that, it’s off to Costa Rica for the final few days of Gerry’s “journey.” The Golden Bachelor is feeling “pretty fired up” as he gazes out at the lush green rainforest from his hotel balcony. “My heart has really changed several times,” admits Gerry. Tell us something we don’t know, buddy! Both Leslie and Theresa think they’re “the one” — and who can blame them? Gerry, try to remember that you’re not required to vocalize everything you’re feeling at any given moment.

With Proposal Day almost upon us, all that’s left for Theresa and Leslie to do is meet Gerry’s family. It’s very sweet to watch his daughters, Jenny and Angie, and granddaughters, Peyton and Charlie, greet Gerry with squeals and hugs when he first walks into their suite.

“God, I missed you guys so bad!” gushes the Golden Bachelor, before getting down to business. “There’s two women left, and I need to know which is the right person.” Gerry admits to saying “I love you” to both women, even though he went into the show committed “to only say ‘I love you’ to one person the rest of my life.” Whoops!

Today’s family visit is with Theresa. She arrives wearing cute shorts and bearing the requisite gift bag and bouquet of flowers. After everyone exchanges hellos and hugs, Theresa announces, “He’s been doing so amazingly well. I mean, they couldn’t have picked a better Golden Bachelor!”

I suppose now is as good a time as any to address the recent hit piece/article about Gerry’s “not-so-golden” past. (If you haven’t read it and would prefer to remain blissfully unaware, skip this paragraph and the next.) If you’re curious, here’s the CliffsNotes version: Gerry allegedly carried on a lengthy relationship with a woman soon after his wife died, and when it ended, he allegedly handled it poorly. Said woman now feels hurt and frustrated that Gerry downplayed-slash-erased their relationship when talking about his dating history as a widower on the show. (The story also takes some odd swipes at Gerry’s employment history, shaming him for working as a maintenance man and essentially saying that he was duplicitous for working past retirement.)

If this reporting about his past, post-Toni relationship is true, it’s a bummer. We all wanted to believe Gerry was the Perfect Man™, right? But friends, are we truly going to be shocked by the revelation that a reality TV contestant, even a sweet older man like Gerry, may have obscured some less-than-savory elements of his past in an effort to craft a pleasant public image? Stop the presses! If Gerry is guilty, he’s guilty of acting like a typical, unenlightened man — at a time, I might add, when he was dealing with grief from a profound loss. People are fallible, and forgiveness is free. Back to the recap!

Gerry and Theresa make a little more chit-chat with the family, and then Jenny and Angie invite Theresa to come and talk with them alone. “To have dad say that he’s in love with Theresa, I guess… is perfectly fine,” says Jenny, who just wants to make sure Theresa “reciprocates the feelings.”

Asked to share what she loves about Gerry, Theresa raves that he’s a “warm-hearted, kind, highly principled person.” She tells them all about Gerry’s “will you help me clean this frosting off my lips” move from night one, and his daughters are impressed. “Smooth!” cries Angie. Things get a bit more serious from there, as Theresa reveals her own past heartbreak with her husband Billy, who passed away after 42 years of marriage. “It’s crazy that they have a really similar story,” notes Angie. “I think that really bonds them together, and also bonds her with our family.”

Both sisters come away assured that Theresa does love their dad, and that she would be a welcome addition to their family. But Angie still has one question for her old man, and it’s about the Fantasy Suites:

“We’re not talking about that,” insists Gerry demurely. He goes on to say that the most important thing about his Fantasy Suite time with Theresa is that he got all his questions answered. Jenny breaks in with a very important follow-up question: “How did she get to your final two if you just found all this stuff out?” Gerry explains that once the cameras were gone and Theresa was able to be herself fully, she went from a “safe choice” to someone he was truly excited to be with: “All of a sudden, the kisses were nicer, the hugs were sweeter, the conversation was easier.” Okay, then! (Here’s hoping Theresa’s feelings aren’t hurt when she hears that Gerry called her the “safe choice.”)

That night, Gerry shows up to Theresa’s hotel room for their Last Chance Date™, and she’s feeling optimistic. “I am hopeful that it’s going to be me and Gerry in the end,” says Theresa. They pop a bottle of champagne and share a few smooches on the couch, and Gerry admits that when he offered her orange juice during her family visit, he didn’t realize it was mixed with vodka. “No wonder I was loopy talking to your daughters!” says Theresa with a giggle. As it turns out, the first-ever time she got drunk it was on vodka and orange juice, which she had during an early date with Billy. Gerry says he loves to hear her stories about Billy, because it helps him understand her more – and it is very sweet to hear them share memories with each other about their late spouses.

As the night winds down, Theresa brings up the (sexy) elephant in the room: Leslie. “I don’t know what’s exactly going on between you, but that’s not my business,” she says. “But that still is a concern.” Still, she wants Gerry to be happy — and if that means being with Leslie, so be it. “As hard as it would be for me, I wouldn’t want you to choose me if you weren’t 1,000 percent wanting me,” says Theresa. “I wouldn’t want it unless that’s how you felt.” The Golden Bachelor assures her that he won’t propose or give her the final rose unless he’s “1,000 percent committed to what we have.”

It's another sunny day in Costa Rica when Gerry arrives at his family’s suite to prep them for their meeting with Leslie. “She’s a lot of fun, and Leslie makes me laugh all the time,” he says. Let’s bring her in, shall we?

The conversation gets off to a lively start, as Leslie reveals that her favorite moment with Gerry so far was when he shed a bit of his “prim and proper” exterior: “On our overnight date, all of a sudden, he said the word, ‘F---,’ and I was like, ‘Yes! I can swear in front of him!’” Of course, Gerry wants his daughters and granddaughters to know that when he dropped the F-bomb, it was with an exclamation point, not a question mark. Peyton and Charlie are all, OMG, grandpa! Stop it!

“Seeing Leslie and dad laughing and being playful was a breath of fresh air,” says Jenny. “The way he communicates with people is through joking around.”

Peyton and Charlie pull Leslie aside for a one-on-one chat first, and they both get emotional hearing her gush about how great their grandpa is. “It’s huge for us that you are seeing this in him,” says Peyton, wiping away tears. “We want you to feel this way for him, because I know, like, he thinks highly of you as well.” Later in her confessional, Peyton says that she and Charlie did have their hearts set on Theresa, but now that they know how great Leslie is, things may have changed.

When Leslie sits down with Jenny and Angie, they ask her if she’d be ready to say yes to a proposal. Her answer is a little meandering; she talks about how she’s never had a “til death do us part love” before, etc. Though she never comes out and says, “I would accept a proposal,” eventually Leslie gets around to saying that she does want to spend the rest of her life with him. “He is the man of my dreams,” she says, tearing up. “He really is.”

At last, it’s time for Gerry to debrief with her daughters. Angie says she finds Leslie’s “freespiritedness” endearing, but Jenny worries that Leslie got emotional because she isn’t sure about marrying Gerry. (Gah! This is why I was worried when Leslie didn’t explicitly say she would accept a proposal.) By the end of the visit, Gerry is more stressed out than ever. “It’s gotten confusing,” he says. “I don’t know how I’m going to handle this.”

As a result, Gerry is a little awkward and hesitant during his goodbyes with Leslie, and he seems in a bit of a hurry to have her leave. “So, whaddya think? Are you ready to go?” Gerry asks. “It’s probably time for me to take off.”

Leslie can tell that something is off with the man she hopes to marry. “I could tell he wasn’t quite himself today,” she says. “I’m just trying to calm myself down about it… That’s all I can do.”

Understandably, Leslie is feeling anxious when the time comes for her Last Chance Date™ with Gerry. Still, she’s trying to stay positive and empathetic. “How are you?” she asks, rubbing his shoulder. “I could tell you weren’t your usual Gerry self today.” The Golden Bachelor apologizes for being distracted, blaming the “stress and pressure” of making a “life-changing” decision. All Leslie can do is reassure Gerry that she’s ready to commit to him and “spend forever” with him.

Gerry wants to lift the mood, so he suggests they “start fresh” and try to have a good night. Leslie gets things going by presenting Gerry with a scrapbook filled with photos and memories of their “journey,” including their one-on-one date card and a snapshot of the time they made out up against a wall during hometown dates. It’s very sweet, and Gerry is touched.

Everything is going great. But then Leslie says, “I love you very, very much,” and Gerry responds with… “That’s such a special sentiment.” Oh boy. The day before, he said “I love you” to Theresa, unprompted, so this cannot be a good sign. Indeed, it seems to hit Gerry in that moment that he’s going to have to break Leslie’s heart. They embrace and sit in silence for a minute. “Be happy,” Gerry says at last, quietly. But he looks sad, and as they hug goodbye, Gerry breaks down and sobs. Not a great sign!

Leslie knows things are about to fall apart. “Is there something you want to tell me?” she whispers. Yes! Yes, there is! But Gerry can’t bring himself to do it. He shakes his head. “Just that I have a tough decision to make,” he says. “Something that’s harder than I ever thought possible.” The Golden Bachelor is so devastated when he leaves, he sits down on the stairs and cries.

Oh, man. He hasn’t even officially dumped her yet! I hope they have a medic on hand for when he does. Back in her room, Leslie looks shattered. “I’m definitely not confident now,” she says, wiping away tears. “I know why he was off today.” Gerry knows that Leslie knows (“they don’t know that we know they know we know”), so he decides the most honorable thing to do is go back to her hotel room and break the bad news now rather than making her wait until tomorrow.

Ugh, this is going to be tough to watch. Gerry knocks on Leslie’s door, and they take a seat on the couch. Both look so somber, it’s kind of heartbreaking. “I thought it’s better to have this conversation now than to have this conversation tomorrow,” Gerry says. Leslie, realizing she’s about to be rejected yet again, steels herself for more pain. “Go ahead,” she says with a deep sigh. When Gerry drops the bombshell — “I have fallen in love with Theresa, and that’s the direction I’m going to take” — she turns on him in anger.

“So, everything you told me the other night was a lie!” Gerry protests, but Leslie plows ahead. “Everything you told me the other night was a complete and utter lie, Gerry.” The Golden Bachelor insists “at that time, that was the truth,” but of course, that’s cold comfort to Leslie. There’s not much Gerry can say to make Leslie feel better, but he keeps trying. “You’re both wonderful, but only one of you is right,” he says. “Leslie, I am so sorry. Believe me, had I known this would be how much pain I would cause someone, I would have never taken the first step in this journey.” It’s all more than Leslie can bear, and she breaks down and sobs.

“It’s typical. This is my life,” she wails. When Gerry protests again (“no, don’t think that!”), Leslie shoots back, “Gerry, no offense — I can think whatever the f--k I want.” HELL YEAH, YOU CAN! Poor Leslie can’t believe she has to handle this heartbreak “in front of the whole world,” which, admittedly, does not sound fun. “The other night, you made it sound like you chose me,” she fumes through her tears. “You led me down a path and then you took a turn and left me there!”

And she’s not done, rose lovers. “It’s mind-boggling, to be honest, how you can talk to me all night, say you love me, and then one day — not even a day — 12 hours later, you changed your mind!” As Gerry sits miserable and silent, Leslie says the only good thing about him dumping her now is that it means she doesn’t have to “walk down in that $60,000 dress with the diamond earrings and get on that platform and be completely embarrassed!”

Dang, a $60,000 dress? Now I’m bummed we won’t get to see it in its full glory. (We do get a quick glimpse of it in the finale promo, which maybe means they filmed these "pensive walk" shots before the last day? LOLOLOLOL)

When Leslie is done venting her (very justified) feelings, Gerry heaves a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I wish there was something I could say, but I know there isn’t.” Leslie’s all, You got that right! Even though she’s devastated and angry, she still manages to tell Gerry that she wants him to be happy, and that Theresa is a “great girl.”

Gerry, sensing an opening to escape, seizes it: “I’ll see myself out.” Once he’s gone, Leslie curls up in a ball on the couch and sobs her heart out. “Time is running out,” she laments. “Time is running out.” Ooof, that is dark. Girl, you are only 64! The current U.S. life expectancy is 77.5! You’ve got more than a decade, at the very least!

Outside, Gerry does a full-on Jason Mesnick balcony cry. Eventually, he pulls himself together, and Palmer comes out for a quick therapy sesh.

“I took a really good person and f---ing broke their heart!” groans Gerry. “I hate myself and I hate everything right now.” Jesse listens quietly, letting the Golden Bachelor process his feelings out loud. “This just isn’t worth all of it,” Gerry continues. “I don’t even know how I got here.” (Um, you signed a contract? Sorry, I know that isn’t helpful right now.)

Smash cut to the Tealight Candle Thunderdome, where Leslie has just watched her excruciating heartbreak play out on a jumbotron in front of a live studio audience. She looks miserable, but still utterly, naturally gorgeous.

The audience greets her with a big, we-love-you burst of applause, and her fellow Golden Bachelorettes can be seen cheering her their support from the sidelines. As he’s contractually obligated to do, Palmer asks Leslie to detail exactly how it felt to relive her awful breakup one more time. “Well, the heartbreak that I experienced, the blindsidedness that happened to me, all those emotions watching it back, I’m feeling that again,” she says. “I was devastated… I fell in love with him so much and I haven’t fallen in love with someone in a really long time, so it was hard. It was really hard.”

Up until the day of the family visit, says Leslie, she was “100 percent certain” that she would be Gerry’s pick in the end. She had picked out her Proposal Platform™ dress and written her “vows” (I’m guessing that’s just what they call the pre-engagement speeches contestants always give), and she was ready for the future. “In my head I had this whole life planned for us,” she says.

But then came the record-scratch moment on the bench after her visit with his family. “He just had some wall up.” At the time, Leslie recalls, Gerry said he was just “spent,” so she tried to take his word for it and stay positive. Of course, that optimism was short lived.

Well, in case you weren’t depressed enough, Leslie, Jesse’s about to welcome Gerry to the stage so you can hash this all out on live TV. Please welcome, our Golden Bachelor.

They greet each other with a hug, and poor thing, she immediately starts crying again. But Leslie pulls it together and lets Gerry know how she feels. “Watching that back was very emotional, obviously,” she begins. “I’ve had a lot of time to process all this now. I’m much better than I was, but I just want to tell you that, you know, Gerry, I fell in love with you for so many reasons, I did…The most important thing I fell in love with was your integrity. I haven’t really been with a man that’s had integrity like you. And because of your integrity, your words meant so much to me. I didn’t take them for granted.”

Oh boy, I can see where this is going. This sweet preamble is building to a pointed, and justified, accusation. “Everybody knows what you said on camera, but only you and I know what was said on the overnight,” Leslie continues. “Those words gave me 100 percent certainty that I was your girl and that we were going to get engaged… Your words just meant so much to me, and that’s why I was blindsided. I wasn’t sure how it changed, or what happened.”

What do you have to say for yourself, Gerry? Jennifer Love Hewitt wants to know!

“I’m so sorry, Leslie,” says Gerry. He goes on to say that as the “journey” went on and the goodbyes got harder, he clung to his original plan: “Give every person I was with my complete commitment, my undivided attention, block out everything else.” In hindsight, Gerry realizes that doing that resulted in some poor decisions. “I got caught up in moments, said I love you,” he admits. “And in those moments, I meant it. It’s not like those were light words. You were the person I believed was my person until I suddenly knew you weren’t.”

Oof. But you know what? Emotions are illogical and often impossible to explain — points for trying, Gerry. Obviously, this doesn’t make Leslie feel great, but she remains gracious. “I don’t know if I accept your apology, but I understand it,” she says. “You showed me that a) I need a man with integrity and someone who is kind and all the things that I want, and I’m going to find that.”

HELL YEAH, you are, Leslie! Perhaps as the Golden Bachelorette?

The conversation ends with Gerry and Leslie wishing each other the best, which, I suppose, is the most we can hope for.

Welp, let’s try to end things on a happier note. Back in Costa Rica, we see Gerry standing in front of a mirror, getting ready for his big day. In a callback to the opening scene of the series premiere, he pops in his hearing aids, and the gentle strains of “The Wind” begin playing. The Golden Bachelor says he’s planning to propose to Theresa, but first he needs to say a prayer and ask Toni for guidance. “I’m pretty comfortable with how she would feel about it,” he tells us.

Now here comes Theresa, looking stunning in a light pink, sparkly dress that probably also has a five-figure price tag. “I’m in love with Gerry, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him,” she tells Palmer. “It’s so hard to be standing here, not knowing what’s going to happen.” Don’t worry, ma’am — that golden rose on the Proposal Platform is about to be yours!

“Gerry, I know how sometimes it feels like the whole world thinks that love is only for the young,” Theresa begins. “And quite honestly, at the age of 70, I was beginning to feel that myself.” But then she met our Golden Bachelor, and her whole outlook changed. “I feel that for us that life isn’t over, that the best is yet to come,” Theresa continues. “Now that I found you, I don’t ever want to let you go.”

Come on, Gerry! Let her know she’s the one! He launches into a speech recalling their many happy times over the course of this “journey,” and how they bonded over each losing a spouse. Then comes the fake-out: “When I woke up this morning, it was difficult,” he says. “I had mixed feelings… And I came to the realization that you’re not the right person for me to live with.” Here he delivers a (producer-prompted) pause for dramatic effect, and Theresa lets out a distressed gasp. “Oh! Okay,” she whispers. “Okay.”

Psych — Gerry wasn’t done, Theresa! “You’re the person that I can’t live without,” he declares, as Theresa almost faints from relief. Even for these producers, that was just cruel. But all’s well that ends well, I guess, because Gerry just got down on one knee.

“Theresa, I love you one thousand percent,” Gerry says. “Every day, I choose you.” (Oof, my heart breaks for poor Leslie having to hear that!) He pops the question, and Theresa responds with a resounding, “YES!” Once the rock is on her finger, Gerry picks up the golden rose. “It’s never going to wilt, it’ll last forever, and it’s a symbol of the love that we have for each other,” he says, before handing it to his bride-to-be.

“It’s like every dream I had come true,” says Theresa. “And we know that Toni and Billy would absolutely be so happy for us right now.” Also happy: Gerry’s daughters and granddaughters, who rush in to offer tearful hugs and congratulations to the happy couple.

And we’re back in the Tealight Candle Thunderdome! Please welcome the senior lovebirds, Gerry and Theresa.

Gerry and Theresa say it’s “fantastic” to be out in public together, and they do look very happy together. Jesse asks Theresa what was going through her mind on proposal day, and she admits that she “pretty much died” when Gerry pulled the “you’re not the right person for me to live with” nonsense. The Golden Bachelor, a little chastened, jokes that he’ll “never use that long a pause as that again the rest of my life.”

Palmer then turns the conversation to the couple’s night in the Fantasy Suite. “There have been a lot of people online saying something happened during the overnight dates,” says the host. “What was it, Gerry?” Mr. Turner shuts him down with a masterful reversal — “Jesse, how often do you ask your parents what happens on overnight dates?” — but he does try to answer the question without too many private details. “I realized all of a sudden here was a woman who knew how to maintain and nurture a relationship,” he explains. “More and more, with every passing moment, she showed her enthusiasm, her adventurous side… Every red flag or potential red flag I had, she addressed before I even had to ask.”

Theresa, bless her, gets the last word. “If he’s not going to tell you exactly what happened in the Fantasy Suite, I’ll tell you. I knocked his boots off.” OH, SNAP! The joke gets a big reaction from her future children and grandchildren-in-law.

“With my kisses!” Theresa adds, giggling. “I’m a good kisser.” Whatever you say, glamma.

At this point, Palmer interrupts the Golden Bachelor lovefest for a preview of Joey’s “journey” as the Bachelor. Since I’ll have to spend more hours than I care to think about watching and recapping this show next year, I’m not going to say much about this trailer, other than hooray for the Golden Bachelorettes!

The evening ends with the earth-shattering announcement Palmer promised at the beginning of the show. ABC is sending Gerry and Theresa on an all-expenses-paid trip to Italy! Oh, and there’s one other thing: Gerry and Theresa want to get married as soon as possible. "We are going to get married. We're going to do it as quickly as we can, because at our age, we don't have a lot of time to waste," jokes Gerry. "So as quickly as we can put together a wedding plan, we're getting married."

You know where this is headed, rose lovers.

Yep, these two will tie the knot on TV as the good Lord intended. We’ve had a few weddings wedged into episodes of Bachelor in Paradise, but ABC hasn’t shelled out for a full wedding special since Sean and Catherine got married in 2014.

With that, the very first ever season of The Golden Bachelor has come to a close. Are you happy with Gerry’s pick? Do you hope ABC chooses Leslie to be the Golden Bachelorette, or are you still holding out hope for Joan or Faith or someone else? And can you believe Bachelor in Paradise is somehow STILL GOING? (One more week, friends!) Let me know your thoughts on Twitter @KristenGBaldwin.

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