Four-time Emmy winner Bryan Cranston deserves a fifth for his Vanderpump Rules monologue

This season of Vanderpump Rules has risen to Shakespearean levels of drama — if Shakespeare could ever pen something as poignant as "Go f--- yourself with a cheese grater."

Andy Cohen, Bravo's own Earl of Southmapton (a Shakespeare patron, obviously), had esteemed, four-time Emmy-winning actor Bryan Cranston on Watch What Happens Live and he couldn't let him go without mining the Pump Rules dramaturgy for every cheese-grating drop.

And, boy, did Walter White deliver.

Bravo Bryan Cranston on 'Watch What Happens Live'

Cranston, who had no idea what Pump Rules or who Ariana Madix were, dove in, 'stache first, into Ariana's monologue from the season finale in which she rips her cheating man-child ex, Tom Sandoval, and his terrible 'stache a new one.

"I've been with you for nine years when you were literally f---ing wearing, like, combat boots and skinny jeans and didn't have a dime to your name," the Asteroid City star begins, profoundly. "Oh, now, now you got a little bit of money, little bar, little band, and this girl is going to act enamored with you? 'Cause that's what you want. You want someone to just gas you up."

This is when Cranston digs really deep and finds the character, pulling out a wagging finger at the invisible Sandoval. Watch the video below.

And. Scene.

In all the years of Clubhouse Playhouse, this might be the most award-worthy performance we've seen thus far. You have the marriage of an excellent monologue, one of the best in Bravo herstory, and an excellent actor. Television Academy, wake up! It's time for Cranston's fifth Emmy.

Meanwhile, Pump Rules has provided some other great Clubhouse Playhouse moments recently, with Cranston's longtime Lead Actor in a Drama Series Emmy rival Jon Hamm and his Maggie Moore(s) director and former Mad Men costar John Slattery delivering the heated "poopoo head" exchange between Sandoval and overgrown, dimple-chinned baby James Kennedy.

It doesn't have the same gravitas as Madix by Cranston, but that's the price of entering the mind of DJ James "Look at me, bro! I am way more ripped than you! I will f--- you up!" Kennedy.

Sign up for Entertainment Weekly's free daily newsletter to get breaking TV news, exclusive first looks, recaps, reviews, interviews with your favorite stars, and more.

Related content:

• Ariana tells Raquel to 'go f--- yourself with a cheese grater' in Vanderpump Rules reunion clip

• As a Vanderpump Rules virgin, part 1 of the reunion was actual insanity — and I… loved it

• Bryan Cranston plans to retire from acting in 2026 to spend time with his wife: 'She deserves it'