EW's favorite alternative Christmas movies
- Oops!Something went wrong.Please try again later.
Illustration by Dan Evans for EW 'Batman Returns', 'Eyes Wide Shut', and 'Mean Girls' are all on our nice list of alternative Christmas movies
'Tis the season for paranoia, love turmoil, bloody betrayal, and, of course, mind-controlled rocket penguins. Strange became the new normal a few apocalyptic zeitgeists ago, which explains our ongoing fascination with movies where off-kilter themes contrast with the Christmas setting. No, not Die Hard, which by now is a positively normy pick about a guy keeping his family together. Give us unusual people in extreme circumstances. In 2022, isn't that all of us?
Batman Returns (1992)
Everett Collection Michelle Pfeiffer, Danny DeVito, and Michael Keaton in 'Batman Returns'.
A classic tale of lonely people with nowhere to go on Dec. 25. Orphaned Batman (Michael Keaton) meets his outcast match in rejected "freak" Oswald Cobblepot (Danny DeVito) and a Selina Kyle (marvelous Michelle Pfeiffer) whose crummy job obliterated her social life into Catladyhood. If only these three glorious weirdos would have just thrown each other a Friendsmas. (HBO Max) —Darren Franich
Carol (2015)
WILSON WEBB/TWC Rooney Mara and Cate Blanchett in 'Carol'.
You could almost set an Advent calendar by the progress of the love affair between tentative shopgirl Therese (Rooney Mara) and soignée housewife Carol (Cate Blanchett) in Todd Haynes' luscious midcentury melodrama: It begins with a loaded compliment for Therese's store-issued elf hat, shifts into high gear when the pair run away on Christmas Day, and is consummated with two flutes of hotel-room champagne on New Year's Eve. Their love may dare not speak its name, but every time a bell rings, a lesbian angel gets her wings. (Prime Video) —Leah Greenblatt
Eyes Wide Shut (1999)
Moviestore/Shutterstock Tom Cruise in 'Eyes Wide Shut'.
Two distinct Times Square moods haunt Stanley Kubrick's romantic nightmare. Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman play upper-crust marrieds in a mistletoe Manhattan, the background perpetually hung with rainbow tree lights. A fit of jealousy sends Cruise's doctor on a journey into an alternative world of ritualistic sleaze. You can't miss the It's a Wonderful Life overtones, complete with a message about being happy with what you already have. Kubrick bless us, everyone. (Netflix) —DF
Go (1999)
Everett Collection Katie Holmes and Sarah Polley in 'Go'.
Drugs, raves, strippers, guns, a threesome, Timothy Olyphant as a shirtless Santa-hatted dealer: Doug Liman's bad-behavior comedy exemplifies the scuzzball '90s. It's a genuine Y2K who's who, from Taye Diggs and Katie Holmes to a wonderful Melissa McCarthy minute. But it's Sarah Polley, radiating post-grunge cool, who steals the show as a cashier trying to make extra December cash the hard way. (VOD) —DF
The Long Kiss Goodnight (1996)
Everett Collection Samuel L. Jackson and Geena Davis in 'The Long Kiss Goodnight'.
Samantha Caine (Geena Davis) is just a wholesome Pennsylvania schoolteacher who makes a hot Mrs. Claus in the local holiday parade. She's also a blank slate who doesn't remember anything before eight years ago, until Samuel L. Jackson's PI jogs her memory: "Samantha" is actually a cover for the stone-cold killer Charly Baltimore, and she's about to get her groove back in Renny Harlin's underrated action thriller, played to the key of Elvis' Yuletide swinger "It's Christmas Time Pretty Baby." (YouTube) —LG
Mean Girls (2004)
Everett Collection The cast of 'Mean Girls'.
Sure, it ends with everyone making nice at the Spring Fling, but the comedy hits its clique climax with a quartet of Santa's helpers. After Cady (Lindsay Lohan) is left heartbroken and humiliated by Regina George (Rachel McAdams) on Halloween, she enters the holiday season with revenge on her mind. Wielding candy-cane-grams as an emotional weapon ("And none for Gretchen Wieners!"), Cady cements her triumph by saving the Plastics' performance of "Jingle Bell Rock." Sometimes, Christmas is about the spirit of giving, and sometimes it's about giving a bully hell. (Paramount+) —Kristen Baldwin
Reindeer Games (2000)
Everett Collection Ben Affleck in 'Reindeer Games'.
A gun-toting-Santa casino heist flick with Ben Affleck and Charlize Theron both giving sexy, young, good-bad performances? I rest my case. (VOD) —DF
Stepmom (1998)
Columbia Pictures/Everett Susan Sarandon, Liam Aiken, and Jena Malone in 'Stepmom'.
Jackie (Susan Sarandon) can't stand that her ex-husband (Ed Harris) is living with his younger girlfriend, Isabel (Julia Roberts). But she also has terminal cancer, so she must make peace with the woman who will help raise her kids. Several squabbles and Motown sing-alongs later, Jackie welcomes Isabel into the family on Christmas Day. Can't handle the complicated emotions that arise from spending time with relatives at the holidays? Let 'em out with this weeper instead. (YouTube) —KB
Tangerine (2015)
Everett Collection Kitana Kiki Rodriguez in 'Tangerine'.
"Merry Christmas Eve, bitch!" announces Sin-Dee Rella (Kitana Kiki Rodriguez) at the start of this invigorating dramedy. Fresh out of jail, Sin-Dee pulls her pal Alexandra (Mya Taylor) on a cheating-boyfriend vengeance quest. Both women are transgender sex workers in Los Angeles — and what's weirder than Christmas in Los Angeles? Director Sean Baker embraces the un-wintry Hollywood setting, filming the streetwalk odyssey on an iPhone. Adultery and pimping aren't typical Noel fare, but Rodriguez and Taylor are magic as found-family besties. (Showtime) —DF
Three Days of the Condor (1975)
Everett Collection Robert Redford in 'Three Days of the Condor'.
Christmas is always nipping at the edges of Sydney Pollack's taut political thriller, starring Robert Redford as a CIA researcher on the run from a shadowy cabal and Faye Dunaway as the woman he inadvertently involves in the world's sexiest kidnap romance. (Hey, it was the '70s.) "Good King Wenceslas" tinkles as his shellshocked Joe wanders through a frosty Central Park; silver-tinsel trees shimmer at the nurses' station where an assassin lies waiting for his untimely end. Even the final, disquieting moments are soundtracked to "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" — though there is no rest for the wicked, or anyone unlucky enough to be on the U.S. government's naughty list. (Prime Video) —LG
Make sure to also check out EW's Holiday Movie Preview cover story on Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery.
Related content:
