EW's 2019 naughty and nice list
‘Twas the morning of Christmas, and all through L.A.
The stars detoxed and yoga’d to start off the day.
The whole town was buzzing with holiday cheer,
Waiting to open presents and toast the New Year.
Santa checked his list twice, both the nice and the naughty,
Making sure his roster wasn’t sloppy or spotty.
He worked hard to put each person in the right group,
To determine who’d get swanky presents from Goop.
Who could be nicer than Fleabag and Hot Priest?
Our love for that duo has only increased.
But hey, their behavior was utterly sordid!
So maybe those two sinners can’t be rewarded?
Goodbyes can be hard, but we loved The Farewell,
And Star Wars and Thrones’ timely adieux as well.
But not nice at all, as things come to an end,
Are trolls who think stories are theirs to amend.
You know who’s good as hell? Why, that Lizzo, of course!
We belted along to “Juice” ‘til we were hoarse.
But making the naughty list, without question,
Are the jerks who inspired her saddest expressions.
This may make you mad, but please do hear us out:
Both Marvel and Marty are nice, without doubt!
On the naughty side of that conflict, however,
Are the tweeters who’d have us debate it forever.
The whole country’s a strip club, as J.Lo has taught us
In one of the class-obsessed films this year brought us.
But naughtier than either half of that pairing
Is a broken system about hoarding, not sharing.
As we look back — goodness! That 2019
Was a year quite unlike any other we’ve seen.
But before a new decade, it’s time to review
Who’s been nice these 12 months (and the naughty ones, too)!
NICE
Fleabag and Hot Priest
Well-timed farewells
Lizzo
Martin Scorsese and Marvel!
Films about class struggle
The March sisters, warming our hearts yet again
Half the characters in Us (TBD which half…)
The parents embroiled a legal battle in Marriage Story
Baby Yoda
“Sorry to this man”
NAUGHTY
Also Fleabag and Hot Priest!
Trolls who demand their own endings
Men who are great ‘til they gotta be great
Everyone fanning the flames between Martin Scorsese and Marvel
A system inspiring films about class struggle
The Jonas Brothers, stealing our hearts yet again!
The other half of the characters in Us
The parents embroiled a legal battle in the college admissions scandal
Uh, Cats
This man, to whom we are sorry
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