Emmy-Winning Puppeteer David Bizzaro Gives Raw Look at Life as a New Dad with ADHD

David Bizarro

Finding out that you're going to be a parent for the first time can be an overwhelming situation in many ways. For David Bizzaro, the news came just after he learned that he was living with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

"I was in a little bit of a panic because I'm learning that yes, I may have ADHD and we're a few minutes away from having a kid," the puppeteer, who most recently worked on Netflix's Waffle + Mochi's Restaurant as Mochi, shares with PEOPLE exclusively.

"I thought, 'I've got to get a handle on this somewhat because when this kid shows up, we're not going to be sleeping a lot. I'm gonna be receiving a lot of stimulation from this tiny human, who needs my support.' "

The puppeteer explains that since his nature is to be honest and straightforward, he was eager to learn more about having ADHD to be able to better explain himself to those around him, including his wife Cassie.

Bizzaro started getting certain "methods" in place, only to find that once his baby boy arrived in May, keeping them in place was "a lot like parenting itself."

"You think man, I've studied up for this thing, I'm ready. And then it happens, and you're like, 'Oh, this is actually happening in a different way than I thought it would. And I can't do the method the way I thought I would.' "

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David Bizarro

Bizzaro and Cassie worked with his therapist to help her understand his issues with task management and task transition — which many living with ADHD struggle with — and how they can be handled so every member of their family's needs are met.

"If I'm doing the dishes and my wife comes up and asks me a question or she has something else to tell me, like, 'Hey can you also wipe down the countertops?' It's a really simple question, and she's telling me so she doesn't forget later," he explains.

"But in my mind, I've already broken down the steps to do what I'm already doing. I told her it's like a string of code, and the code is in an order and executed in that order. If you walk in and you want to implement a new part of that code, which is wash the countertops, my brain kind of breaks a little bit and I can get moody about it."

Admitting there were times where he could get "annoyed and angry" about these situations, learning he had ADHD and his subsequent treatments made Bizzaro realize "there was no reason to be mad about this."

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David Bizarro

"What I didn't know was it was happening because I'm having a hard time with task transition and I knew myself enough to know that her telling me, it added another level of stress of knowing I'm going to forget this thing and then she's going be mad at me," he says.

His therapist offered a solution: "[I now have] an area where I know to look for Post-it notes, so when I'm done with one task, I can look at it and get to whatever else came up while I was doing it."

The couple have also developed a routine when it comes to putting their now 5-month-old to bed.

"At the end of the day, I can put my headphones on and I can go run the task and get everything done while Cassie's putting the baby to sleep or vice versa, where I'm putting the baby to sleep and giving him a bath and I run those steps and get them done," he says.

When they first brought their son home, Bizzaro says the couple had to "go deep into our communication" as first-time parents.

David Bizarro

"With partners, when either both people have ADHD or one person has it, you have to communicate and be straightforward, while also being kind. If you don't talk about these things, they end up festering," he says.

Bizzaro says his wife, who does not have ADHD, was suddenly able to relate to him on a new level when she began experiencing symptoms of sleep deprivation as they adjusted to life with a newborn.

"My wife and I had this little gremlin living in our bedroom with us and he was waking up every 30 minutes and so my wife started feeling really weird," he recalls.

"The article I found was directed towards new moms because apparently some new moms will go to the doctor and say, 'I think I have ADHD' and the doctor will say, 'No, you're sleep deprived.' My wife told me, 'I actually really understand you so much better.' "

David Bizarro

Bizzaro — who is currently developing a show with Blue's Clues alum Steve Burns — says that learning to communicate about ADHD as a new parent was "the thing that helped me the most."

"Being able to say to my partner that i need a break and that being okay meant a lot. I would just go into my bedroom and lay on the bed in the dark, no phone or audio or anything, maybe close my eyes," he says.

"And if my mind needed to race, I would let it race. I wouldn't put any pressure on myself to push those thoughts out or to feel that I needed to do anything, and it was usually 30 minutes," he continues. "I communicated to my wife early on that that was something that I felt that I was going to need."

"But of course I made sure that it didn't become an excuse for me to not do my part as a parent, because I think that's also something that gets forgotten in these conversations," he adds. "Even though we are neuro-diverse, I'm still responsible for things and I still have things that I need to be accountable for."