Reality TV star and model Courtney Stodden is revealing a sad chapter in her life amid her divorce from actor Doug Hutchison.
The two finalized their divorce on Tuesday after nine years of marriage. She was just 16 when they wed and he was 50. Now, Stodden is 24 years-old and opening up in a new YouTube video about her struggles with depression which led to her attempting to take her own life last year.
"It's no secret that I have struggled with depression," she says in the video. "I didn't see a way out of all the pain and the grief and the insanity that I've struggled with in my life. I just feel like it all got too much for me," she continued. "I decided in a really drunken state that this was the best option."
Now, she says, she realizes that it was a mistake and she is thankful it didn't work.
"I still can't believe that I did that. I've lost a lot and I've gained a lot. I've been hospitalized for multiple panic attacks," Stodden said.
"Life is worth living. No matter what. No matter what other people have done to you," she added.
She also discussed her marriage to the Green Mile co-star who was three decades older than her. "I believe Doug and I had so much love that was toxic given the situation. I was a child. You can't get around that I was a child. I don't think Doug ever saw me as a child," she said.
Fans in the comments flocked with messages of support.
"It wasn’t you, it was the alcohol and depression tricking you. Depression is hard, I am alive by the grace of god. And I was at that point once too. You have reached your epiphany, and will go onwards and upwards from here. This has happened for a reason. You are here to save some other people," one wrote.
"You're such a beautiful girl inside and out. You've had such a challenging young life so far. Stay strong lady and I look forward to reading your book," another wrote.
"My heart goes out to you. I appreciate you speaking out about your pain and struggles. I can definitely read between the lines. When you said, 'the only way out"' my heart broke. I'm sorry no one protected you. Praying for your healing process," another commented.
"I can't stop crying. I don't know if I could handle if you die. I love you so much. You are a role model to me. You are such a strong woman, so gorgeous, and a wonderful person, so brave, I really admire you. My fav blonde bombshell," a fourth noted.