This Is Called Being a Colossal Dick for No Reason at All

Photo credit: Andy Manis - Getty Images
Photo credit: Andy Manis - Getty Images

From Esquire

(Permanent Musical Accompaniment To This Post)

Being our semi-regular, somewhat tardy, weekly survey of what's goin' down in the several states where, as we know, the real work of governmentin' gets done, and where the emptiness is empty, cold as the clay.

Since things in the labs slow down in the summer, our tour will spent almost all of its time in Wisconsin, where the speaker of the state assembly, a former Scott Walker house pet named Robin Vos, has decided to demonstrate that most Republican of Republican traits: being a colossal dick for no good reason at all. There is in the assembly a Democratic member named Jimmy Anderson. He has been paralyzed from the waist down for nine years because a drunk driver slammed into a car he was driving, and killed both of his parents and his brother. Naturally, getting around is not easy for Anderson, and he asked Vos if he could call into meetings he couldn't make in person.

Vos, performing to type, denied Anderson's request and then turned himself into the victim. From WTMJ in Milwaukee, via the AP:

Speaker Robin Vos sent Rep. Jimmy Anderson the letter just hours after The Associated Press contacted every Republican in leadership to see if they agreed with barring Anderson from calling into meetings. None of the lawmakers commented. The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel first reported on Anderson's request on Monday. Vos tells Anderson that he can't change the Assembly meeting rule "by fiat" and the full Assembly would have to vote. However, Vos reiterated his opposition to allowing lawmakers to phone into committee meetings, a practice that's not allowed in many other state legislatures but that the Wisconsin Senate does permit.

"This tends to lend itself to disruptive, ineffective meetings," Vos wrote to Anderson. "Additionally, it is disrespectful to the members of the public who come to testify on legislation. I have always been disappointed to walk into a Senate hearing to see a chairperson surrounded by only phones because the members did not show up in person to listen to testimony."

OK, so some pols are lazy, but this guy is confined to a damn wheelchair.

However, in an attempt to accommodate Anderson, Vos said he would make a videographer available upon request for meetings Anderson can't make so he could potentially watch them via a livestream or on tape later. Vos said he would also consider changing the rules to allow for paper ballot voting, a process in which the lawmaker can vote without being present. But Vos also took issue with Anderson for taking his complaint to the press. "Instead of resorting to political grandstanding, you could have called my personal cell phone at any time to discuss this matter," Vos said.

Do try to get over it, Mr. Speaker. Jesus, these really are the mole people.

Photo credit: Bryna Godar/AP/Shutterstock
Photo credit: Bryna Godar/AP/Shutterstock

Vos noted that Anderson has been accommodated in other ways, including purchasing a special wireless microphone for the Assembly floor, installing special voting equipment and granting his personal assistant access to his computer even though she's not a state employee.

Wow, that's mighty abled of you, sport.

And we conclude our truncated survey, as is our custom, in the Great State of Oklahoma, whence Blog Official Bison Whisperer Friedman of the Plains brings us the tale of yet another group of education "reformers" who were Only In It For The Kids. From the Norman Transcript:

State and federal investigators are probing allegations of embezzlement of public funds by the online school’s leaders. They have denied wrongdoing. State Superintendent of Instruction Joy Hofmeister briefed board members on the Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation’s search warrant affidavit, filed in court July 16, and a forensic audit now underway by the State Auditor & Inspector. Hofmeister joined Gov. Kevin Stitt in requesting the audit Friday.

Epic has stirred controversy since the get-go, and in the OSBI affidavit, the investigator alleges that the entire premise of Epic was a money-making “scheme.” Hofmeister indicated the Education Department has fielded complaints for years but has been unable to verify allegations without additional authority, such as subpoena power, which she said 51 other state agencies (like the auditor) have. “We will continue to ask for that (subpoena power),” she said. She gave the example of the OSBI investigator’s seizure last month of an Epic teacher’s laptop, along with a cell phone. The Education Department does not have the authority to do that. They also do not have records of students who are home-schooled or are enrolled in private schools, which could have been used to verify the dual enrollment of “ghost students” alleged in the affidavit.

To begin tracking that, the Legislature would have to change the law. “I think that Oklahoma would have to decide, ‘How far would that reach be, with the government, in the personal lives of families?’” She also wants to see the Statewide Virtual Charter School Board, which authorizes Epic and other virtual schools, placed under the state Education Department. The department plans to push for subpoena power and authority over the Statewide Virtual Charter School Board in the next legislative session.

Go ahead. Say it. You know you want to.

EPIC FAIL!

This is your democracy, America. Cherish it.

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