BTS' RM Says He Struggled with His Identity After Band's Temporary Break: 'I Didn't Know Who I Was'

Rachel DeSantis
·3 min read
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RM of BTS attends a press conference for BTS's new digital single 'Butter' at Olympic Hall on May 21, 2021 in Seoul, South Korea.
RM of BTS attends a press conference for BTS's new digital single 'Butter' at Olympic Hall on May 21, 2021 in Seoul, South Korea.

The Chosunilbo JNS/Imazins via Getty RM

BTS' RM is using the band's extended break as an opportunity to learn more about himself.

The K-pop star, 28, opened up in a new interview about the difficulties he faced when BTS hit the brakes last year, and the ways in which he was forced to look inward and separate his own identity from that of the South Korean group.

"After 10 years as a member of BTS, I didn't know who I was and I wanted to know," he told the Spanish news agency EFE. "I started out as a teenage rapper, then BTS came along and it was all very intense. Now that the group is inactive, I've gone back to thinking about the beginnings and the real reasons why I joined BTS."

RM said that upon announcing BTS' extended break last June, he had a "hard time on a human level" as he learned to work without bandmates Jungkook, j-hope, Jin, V, Jimin and Suga. Jin recently joined the South Korean army to complete his mandatory service time, and his band members will all follow suit in the coming years.

"When you are famous, staying on top is very difficult," he told EFE. "But I think BTS will make it. It will come together again when we finish our military service, and we will look for new synergies between us to enter a second phase. But, in any case, nothing lasts forever."

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The singer (whose real name is Kim Nam-joon) released his first solo album Indigo in December, and said he traveled to Spain for inspiration as he works on a follow-up record. He said he sought inspiration in museums like the Prado in Madrid, and in artwork by artists like Francisco Goya, Diego Velazquez and Pablo Picasso.

"K-pop and k-drama are in fashion," he said, "so, ironically, I am at the center of the trend at a time when I feel the need to step away from that and have time to think and create with a more timeless outlook."

BTS debuted in 2013, and have notched six No. 1 singles on the Billboard Hot 100 since 2020, and earned five Grammy nominations.

RELATED: BTS Star J-Hope Taps J. Cole for New Single 'On the Street': 'I Was Deeply Moved'

V, Suga, Jin, Jungkook, RM, Jimin and J-Hope of BTS attends the 64th Annual GRAMMY Awards at MGM Grand Garden Arena on April 03, 2022 in Las Vegas, Nevada
V, Suga, Jin, Jungkook, RM, Jimin and J-Hope of BTS attends the 64th Annual GRAMMY Awards at MGM Grand Garden Arena on April 03, 2022 in Las Vegas, Nevada

Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic BTS

They announced in June that all seven members would be embarking on a "new chapter" together in which they would "remain active as a team while taking individual journeys to further achieve personal growth."

A spokesperson for the group also told Pitchfork, "To be clear, they are not on hiatus but will take time to explore some solo projects at this time and remain active in various different formats."

In the months since, Jin began serving his military time, and j-hope began the process of joining the military last month after legally deferring for several years.

RELATED: BTS' J-Hope Begins Process to Join South Korean Military After Legally Deferring for Years

J-hope dropped his first official solo album Jack in the Box in July, while Jimin is set to release his debut solo album Face on March 24. Suga, meanwhile, will become the first member to tour solo when he kicks off a string of shows in April.