Bryce Dallas Howard Says 'Battling Depression Has Been the Biggest Challenge to My Identity'
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Rich Polk/Getty Images Bryce Dallas Howard
Bryce Dallas Howard is speaking out about her mental health.
In a lengthy post on Instagram recognizing World Mental Health Day on Monday, the Jurassic World Dominion actress said that "battling depression has been the biggest challenge to my identity."
"My entire life, I had been so hyper-focused on blocking negative thoughts that I failed to embrace or appreciate that these feelings and emotions and crises were not only not to be avoided, but that they were integral to the human experience," she wrote in part.
Howard, 41, also shared that she first recognized the significance of not burying her feelings years ago, when she first had her children. (The actress shares son Theodore, 15, and daughter Beatrice, 10, with husband Seth Gabel.)
"It was the last day on my first job as a new mother. I was still in the throes of postpartum depression, and I was in a car, alone, heading straight into the exquisite sunset we'd anxiously awaited all day," she wrote. "It was an existential moment, and since no one could hear me, I asked the question aloud: What is the purpose of ALL OF THIS?!"
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VALERIE MACON/AFP via Getty Bryce Dallas Howard
"Those words are the response I received: to move through obstacles with grace, and that struggle will guide you toward the sunset," Howard wrote. "We are here FOR the obstacles, not to avoid them."
She continued, "I'm not the optimist I once envisioned myself to be. Instead, I'm an emotionally-charged ball of wonder and awe, practicality and possibility, with an indefatigable capacity to find humor and joy in the absurdity of whatever life serves up."
"This is where I've landed today on my journey, and tomorrow may be different, but I share these musings on #WorldMentalHealthDay in case they can offer any hope or simply a 'same, same!' ❤️," the actress concluded her post.
The Rocketman star has been outspoken in the past about her struggle with postpartum depression following Theo's birth, and told PEOPLE that she has her dad, actor and director Ron Howard, to thank for encouraging her to seek help.
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"Therapy is awesome," she said at the time. "My dad always said, 'Do you want to know why actors get paid so much money? So they could have great therapists.' "
Howard said at the time her experience after welcoming Beatrice was completely different.
"I didn't get [postpartum depression] the second time around and I was hell bent on making sure that I felt supported so that if I needed to, I would get help faster," she explained.
If you or someone you know needs mental health help, text "STRENGTH" to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 to be connected to a certified crisis counselor.
