This Bridesmaid Went Viral For Venting About Bachelorette Party Costs And It's A Movement

·5 min read

A woman named Erin recently caught the attention of over 700,000 people on TikTok after she shared how much she had to pay to go on a bachelorette vacation.

In her video, she says, "So I'm packing right now to go on a bachelorette trip this weekend – not a bachelorette party, but a bachelorette vacation. We are flying across the country for five days...I wanted to ask you guys: How do you feel about the bridesmaids paying for the bride's portion of the bachelorette party?"

Erin talking in the video
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com

Erin goes on to explain, "We paid for the bride's flight and her portion of the Airbnb. It wasn't like we talked about until after we booked the Airbnb, which I find a little weird. So I booked the Airbnb. I put it on my credit card and it was supposed to be like $240 a person — not too bad. But, we each had to book a $400 flight."

  @moneytomiles / tiktok.com
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com

"So, after we book this Airbnb, one girl drops out so that made it a little more expensive for everybody, but then as everyone was Venmoing me back, since I was the one who booked the Airbnb, the maid of honor (MOH) texted in our bachelorette group text — which the bride wasn't in — and was like, 'Hey, I just saw that the bride Venmoed Erin, what did she Venmo you for?'"

Erin in the middle of talking in her video
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com

Erin explained that the bride Venmoed her for her portion of the Airbnb. The MOH texted back in the group chat that Erin should Venmo her the money back, saying that they all were responsible for paying for the bride's portion of the Airbnb AND her flight, then texted how much each person owed for the bride. "I don't know – the whole thing is just weird to me because obviously, I agreed to go on the bachelorette party, so it would be weird for me to back out after I already booked the Airbnb," Erin says in the video.

"And when you're in a group message with nine other girls, you're not going to speak up and say, 'Oh, I don't think we should be paying for this, or I didn't realize this, it's out of my budget, XYZ.' I think I just have a problem when someone tells me how much I owe them without asking me if that's an amount I'm comfortable with. Everyone makes a different amount of money and everyone has a different comfort level when it comes to spending money on a trip like this. So, what do you guys think? Is this normal? This is my first time being a bridesmaid for someone other than my sister. Is this expected? Should I be expecting this every time I'm asked to be a bridesmaid? Just for context, the bridesmaids are also paying for the shower too. We each gave the MOH $300 for the shower," she concluded in her TikTok.

Right away, people in the comments agreed that the bride's trip fees should not be the responsibility of the bridesmaids.

comments saying you don't get a free vacation just because you're getting married
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com
commenter saying that if the bride decided on the vacation then she should pay a portion
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com
commenter's grandfather's advice: you never invite someone to spend their own money
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com

And then it opened up conversations about how costly weddings are in general for the wedding party.

  @moneytomiles / tiktok.com
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com

Let's just say not everyone sees eye-to-eye on wedding party expenses and excursions.

people saying it's out of hand and a bride saying it should just be one night of celebration
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com

And that includes the bridal shower...

someone shocked that each person gave the MOH $300 each
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com

However, there were a few brides who peeped up letting people know they were the ones who actually took on the financial responsibility of their bachelorette parties.

a bride saying she paid more for the Airbnb to help her party out
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com

Which I'm sure was very appreciated.

bride saying she took most of the cost since it's her wedding
@moneytomiles / tiktok.com

OK, we wanted to know more so BuzzFeed spoke to Erin who actually happens to be a content creator in the personal finance/Gen Z finance space. "I have built an audience around giving tips on saving, budgeting, and investing. The high cost of being a bridesmaid is never really talked about and seems like a taboo subject to discuss," she said.

Erin said it never even crossed her mind to think that the bride wouldn't be paying for her own portion of the trip. "The bride decided on the location of the bachelorette trip, we didn't pick the place to surprise her with or anything. In addition, when we were discussing Airbnb options and how much they would cost, we weren't told by the MOH to factor in the cost of the bride as well."

And, as Erin stated in her TikTok, the MOH asked the bridesmaids to pay $300 EACH for the bridal shower. "I thought that the families typically paid for the shower so that was definitely an unexpected cost, especially because we weren't asked about our budgets for it or told that we were paying for it before a location and caterer were booked. I get that sometimes families can't afford to throw a shower, but in that case, I think MOHs need to be respectful of people's budgets and ask for input on a location/caterer that will be financially comfortable for everyone."

After everything was said and done, Erin just kept quiet and paid the money. "The bride is obviously a good friend of mine and I'm not trying to stress her out because it is her wedding. I shared the story on TikTok because unfortunately, girls go through this type of stuff ALL the time as bridesmaids — budgets aren't really considered."

You can follow Erin for more financial-related tips on TikTok.