Scientific breakthrough: Kim Kardashian says she has defied nature and cannot make a bowel movement, or fart.
The reality star announces the news in the latest issue of Cosmo (via Perez), revealing that people would be surprised to know that she's never "gone #2 or passed gas."
Impressive! Also, did Khloe "The Funny One" Kardashian tell her to say that? Or, is The Pretty One much funnier than we have been led to believe?
Meanwhile, since she is so pristine and glamorous and only goes #1, Kardashian should really consider starring in a remake of the '80s masterpiece "Mannequin," wherein Andrew McCarthy falls in love with Kim Cattrall, who plays a department-store mannequin who probably doesn't poop because she comes to life but isn't really human, you know?
Can you make it happen, Kris? (The Famous requests to be billed as "co-creator.")