Critics agree about the new action flick "Getaway" starring Ethan Hawke and Selena Gomez: It's not only bad, it's epically bad.
Right now, the movie's Rotten Tomatoes score is a dismal one percent out of 100, with 75 reviewers panning the movie and only one giving it a thumbs-up. (And yes, this comes disturbingly close to the site's record of worst-ever reviewed movies.)
Even sadder still, the one positive note on "Getaway," from Norman Winter of NOW Toronto, isn't much to write home about: "As a great man once said, people who like this sort of thing will like this sort of thing. "
In "Getaway," Hawke plays a former NASCAR driver whose wife has been kidnapped. In order to get her back, he has to steal a car and run some nasty errands for an unscrupulous crime boss (Jon Voight). But the owner of the car, a young tech genius played by Gomez, tries to steal back her Shelby Mustang GT 500 Super Snake (nice ride, Selena), and she becomes part of the wild chase through the streets of Bulgaria. (Yes, Bulgaria. Don't all NASCAR racers retire there?)
Most reviewers have a hard time finding anything nice to say about "Getaway," but they're going the extra mile to dump on Selena Gomez, despite the generally positive notices she received for "Spring Breakers." "In this co-lead role [Gomez] exhibits the acting range of a hubcap," writes Peter Howell of the Toronto Star. "Good thing she still has her pop career to fall back on." And Jordan Hoffman of Screen Crush says, "If nothing else 'Getaway' has accomplished one significant thing. It makes it plain that Selena Gomez, highly beloved pop icon she might be, has no business passing herself off as an actress."
No one is in love with Hawke's work in the film, either. In his case the consensus seems to be that Hawke ought to know better. "One can only guess why Ethan Hawke felt compelled to make a high dive from the sublimity of 'Before Midnight' into the twisted rubble of 'Getaway," writes Stephen Holden in the New York Times. "What other reason could there be for a star to attach his name to a mindless demolition derby but the payday?"
But the biggest blame is being handed to director Courtney Solomon. "Director Courtney Solomon doesn't know how to shoot action; his herky-jerk style is a constant distraction and never lets momentum build," said Adam Graham in the Detroit News. And Laura Clifford at Reeling Reviews quips, "Solomon makes one wonder what Alan Smithee's been up to lately." (Coined in 1968, "Alan Smithee" is an official pseudonym used by film directors who wish to disown a project.)
Keep in mind that plenty of legendary stinkers have managed to pull in a few favorable reviews. Tommy Wiseau's infamous indie disaster turned cult favorite "The Room" has a 33 percent at Rotten Tomatoes. "The Brown Bunny," famously described by Roger Ebert as the worst movie to ever play the Cannes Film Festival, gets a 43 percent. "Grown Ups 2," generally considered significantly worse than the poorly reviewed first installment, managed to squeak ahead of "Getaway" with 7 percent. And "Glitter," Mariah Carey's misbegotten screen debut, also pulled in 7 percent. (For the record, "Plan Nine From Outer Space," often cited as the worst movie ever made, actually gets a 65 percent on Rotten Tomatoes, thanks to plenty of "so bad it's good" notices.)
And a few major release films are still stuck with a zero percent rating on Rotten Tomatoes, including the 2008 thriller "One Missed Call" (starring Shannyn Sossamon and Edward Burns), the 2002 action misfire "Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever" (with Antonio Banderas and Lucy Liu), and Roberto Benigni's disastrous 2002 followup to "Life is Beautiful, "Pinoccio."
So "Getaway" is safe (just barely, but safe) from hitting the bottom of the Rotten Tomatoes barrel. And there's still a chance, however slim, that more good reviews may come in.
But it has to be a bit disappointing to the producers of "Getaway" (and humiliating for fellow pop star Gomez) that boy band One Direction is trouncing them in critical praise. "One Direction: This Is Us," the new documentary about the UK pop sensations, is currently the best-reviewed film opening this weekend on RT, earning a very respectable 72 percent.
Don't hate the best song ever, Selena — hate the game.
Watch 'Getaway' Theatrical Trailer 2: