Michael Bay wakes up in the morning and makes Hollywood blockbusters. He saunters onto the set of whatever bajillion-dollar production he's currently working on and calls the shots on crash-filled car chases, huge explosions, giant robot battles and other stuff that most people never get to do.
Yes, Michael Bay — for better and worse — is one of our top action directors. He's also the guy who gets air conditioners thrown at him.
That 'bizarre encounter' (to quote Paramount's own official press release regarding the incident) on the Hong Kong set of "Transformers: Age of Extinction" is just the latest of many strange chapters that make up the surreal adventure that is Michael Bay's life and career. Even his detractors (and there are a few) must admit that he seems to be an endearingly silly man whose real-life shenanigans often take on the epic and over-the-top qualities of his own movies.
See below. It's all true (well, mostly, anyway).
1. He played Frederic in a high school production of "The Pirates of Penzance."
2. He made fun of himself in a Verizon FIOS commercial.
Which is awesome. Awesome barbecue, awesome pool. Genius.
3. His Miami home used to belong to Hulk Hogan.
It's also 17,000 square feet, which should come as a surprise to no one. Bay describes it as "a nice house to read in."
Sheesh, if this is his house in Miami, what does his house in Hollywood look like?
4. The screening room in his Miami home constantly plays "Pearl Harbor" in a loop.
Well, that's what we imagined when we saw this picture of Bay's in-home movie-watchin' room.
5. He has an English mastiff named 'Bonecrusher.'
And he's a very nice doggie. He has another English mastiff, too, probably named 'Scrapper,' 'Scavenger,' 'Mixmaster,' 'Hook' or 'Long Haul.'
6. He offered a $50,000 reward for information leading to the arrest of a Bosnian woman who was filmed throwing puppies into a river.
As we all would've if we had $50,000. The original notice on Michael Bay's official site read as follows:
There is a disturbing video going around the news outlets. It's a video of blonde young woman in a red sweatshirt casually tossing squealing puppies into the fast-moving river one by one.
Michael Bay has informed me that he is offering a $50,000 reward for information leading to the arrest and successful prosecution of the woman in the red sweatshirt and the person who shot this act of cruelty.
7. Megan Fox compared him to Napoleon and Hitler.
Yeah, not the historical figures you want to be associated with. The comparison apparently cost Megan that sweet "Transformers" gig, but then she and Michael kissed and made up and he cast her as feisty and appropriately outspoken reporter April O'Neil in the new "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" movie.
8. He knocked "Armageddon," and then took it back.
As we all must do when we finally come to our senses and recognize it for the masterpiece it is ... the way the Criterion Collection has.
What, no "Bad Boys II"? What the heck, Criterion?
10. He's BFFs with the Pentagon.
"Thanks to the success of 'Pearl Harbor,' Bay has built up so much goodwill with the Pentagon that he can call up and order F-16s the way the rest of us order hot wings," wrote Scott Brown in Wired in June 2007.
That's a vaguely terrifying statement, isn't it? You probably shouldn't use "hot wings" as a comparative metaphor for military fighter jets.