Casting the ‘Gilligan’s Island’ Movie with Josh Gad

Gilligan's Island
Gilligan's Island

Well sit right back, and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip ...

It would appear that the seven castaways of "Gilligan's Island" have hit the shores of Hollywood as the much beloved television series is being anchored as a star vessel for none other than Josh Gad, who's currently delighting audiences as the voice of Olaf the Snowman in "Frozen" (he'll also co-write the script).

"Gilligan's Island" chronicled the bumbling misadventures of seven castaways as they attempted to survive on an island in the middle of nowhere, with most of their escape attempts thwarted by the bumbling yet lovable antics of First Mate Gilligan (Bob Denver). The original sitcom ran for three seasons on CBS from September 26, 1964, to September 4, 1967, followed by three made-for-television movies: "Rescue From Gilligan's Island" (1978), "The Castaways on Gilligan's Island" (1979) and, of course, "The Harlem Globetrotters on Gilligan's Island" (1981).

Martin Landau played the bad guy in that last one.

While the show was about as goofy as you could get, there have been some darker interpretations of the characters and the premise over the years, with one being that the castaways are archetypes of the Seven Deadly Sins: Gluttony (Gilligan), Wrath (the Skipper), Greed (Thurston Howell III, 'the Millionaire'), Sloth (Eunice Howell, 'his Wife'), Lust (Ginger Grant, 'the movie star'), Pride (Professor Roy Hinkley) and Envy (Mary Anne Summers).

We'll let David Fincher take care of a "Gilligan's Island" adaptation that explores that kind of stuff but for now, we've got a "Gilligan's Island" that's going to star the guy who plays Elder Arnold Cunningham in Broadway's "The Book of Mormon." Here's where we picture Josh Gad in the ensemble, along with some fantasy co-stars ...

Michael Cera as Gilligan (Original Actor: Bob Denver)

Who better to play everyone's "Little Buddy" than the life (and, later, death) of the "This Is the End" party? After weirdo turns in weirdo indie flicks like "Magic Magic" and "Crystal Fairy," the "Superbad" star could use a return to comedy -- you can even imagine Jonah Hill as Gilligan's oft-mentioned but never-seen best pal, Skinny Mulligan.

Josh Gad as Skipper Jonas Grumby (Original Actor: Alan Hale, Jr.)

While its safe to assume that Warner Bros. is picturing Gad for Gilligan, we think the more interesting casting would be having him play the Skipper of the doomed S.S. Minnow. We can totally picture him being alternately exasperated by and affectionate toward Michael Cera's Gilligan, swatting him with his hat and calling him "Little Buddy." If the film keeps with the story being set in the '60s, you could even have a flashback scene in which Gilligan saves the Skipper from a loose depth charge when they're serving in the United States Navy during World War II, as described in the show.

Scarlett Johansson as Ginger Grant (Original Actor: Tina Louise)

Who better to play "the Movie Star" than one of the hottest movie stars working today? ScarJo would look great in Ginger's increasingly outrageous evening gowns, though it's her knack for comedy -- recently on display in "Don Jon" and Spike Jonze's "Her" — that would really bring the role home. Otherwise ... we wouldn't mind Emma Stone one bit.

Mila Kunis as Mary Anne Summers (Original Actor: Dawn Wells)

The ever-burning question of "Ginger or Mary Anne?" will be asked once again as "Black Swan" beauty Mila Kunis gives ScarJo a run for her money as Mary Anne Summers, the farm girl hottie from Winfield, Kansas. Maybe Mila will further follow in Dawn Wells' footsteps and publish her own "Mary Ann's Gilligan's Island Cookbook."

Armie Hammer as Professor Roy Hinkley, Ph.D. (Original Actor: Russell Johnson)

He's handsome, he's funny, and everyone needs to just forget the whole "Lone Ranger" disaster and let this guy be a movie star. Armie Hammer showed off his comedy chops to terrific effect in "Mirror Mirror," bringing a sense of bumbling pride to the character of Prince Alcott; add that to the Ivy League arrogance of his Winklevoss Twins in "The Social Network" and you've got the perfect Professor Roy Hinkley, whose supposed technical expertise never quite contributed enough to the seemingly insurmountable task of getting off the island.

Kelsey Grammer as Thurston Howell III (Original Actor: Jim Backus)

Frasier from "Cheers" as Thurston Howell III -- Harvard graduate, Republican and multi-billionaire until his losses in the Great Depression left him merely a multi-millionaire? The term 'no-brainer' comes to mind.

Allison Janney as Eunice Lovelle Wentworth Howell (Original Actor: Natalie Schafer)

Wrapping up our fantasy "Gilligan's Island" movie cast is "Juno" and "The Way Way Back" star Allison Janney as Eunice Howell, Thurston's pompous and fussy wife. Janney would be perfect in expressing her aghast-ness toward the whole stowaway situation, and might even allow the filmmakers to film her in close-up -- something that original actor Natalie Schafer ensured would never happen in her contract, perhaps because of her age (she was 63 at the time the pilot was shot, and took the job only because it was being filmed in Hawaii).