The best 20 lines from the Logan Roy funeral episode of Succession
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WARNING: This story contains spoilers for Succession season 4, episode 9, "Church and State."
The Succession principals gathered in New York on Sunday's episode to see off Brian Cox's late and (somewhat) lamented media magnate Logan Roy. Did this cause Kieran Culkin's Roman, Sarah Snook's Shiv, Jeremy Strong's Kendall, and all the rest to tone down their hilarious, vitriolic, and just plan nasty language on the show, written by Succession creator Jesse Armstrong? F--- no!
From Roman's disgusting jokes about Shiv's pregnancy to Shiv's repeated verbal swings at her own mother Lady Caroline (Harriet Walter), all concerned seemed driven to new heights, or maybe depths, of caustic unpleasantness by the occasion.
David M. Russell/HBO Matthew Macfadyen and Sarah Snook on 'Succession'
Below you'll find our selection of the episode's best lines.
"If you have a littley d---y, maybe you don't go to the nudist beach."
Lukas Matsson (Alexander Skarsgård) explains to Shiv why he's wary of revealing that his company is not as successful as he had previously stated.
"I'm a wheelman. I'm a casket wheelman. I'm front right."
Tom (Matthew Macfadyen) tells Greg (Nicholas Braun) why it is important he attends Logan's funeral.
"Is it mine?"
Roman reacts inappropriately to Shiv's announcement that she is pregnant.
"You're having a Wambs-gland. I thought you'd just been eating your feelings."
Roman continues to tease Shiv.
"Ooh, Marsha's looking chic. Yummy. Sexy funeral lady. If you're weirded out by that, wait 'til I have sex with her on dad's coffin."
Roman to Kendall, upon sighting Logan's widow, played by Hiam Abbass, at the funeral.
"Well, here she comes. I thought I could hear the sound of dalmations howling."
Shiv alerts Kendall to the arrival of their mother Lady Caroline.
"Maybe be nice, in case she drops dead of a broken heart. Or not having a heart."
Kendall suggests to Shiv how they should treat Lady Caroline.
"What are you thinking about the handsome Nazi over there? Is he going to win? And, if he does, like, ironically, would that be bad for a tall blonde white guy?"
Matsson asks Shiv for her thoughts on likely presidential election-victor Jeryd Mencken (Justin Kirk).
"I can do f---ing anything, my dad just died."
Shiv assures Matsson that she can introduce him to Mencken.
"He got it on a deal. He was really pleased. It was a dotcom Pet Supply guy who built it, I believe, but that guy decided against."
Connor explains to his siblings how Logan bought his mausoleum.
"Are you serious? Was he in a bidding war with Stalin and Liberace?"
Shiv responds to Connor's info dump.
"I think it was five mill all in. But that's forever, obviously."
Connor gives more details about the mausoleum deal.
"Intrigued to see how he gets out of this one."
Shiv about the laid-to-rest Logan.
"You'll be my dog, but the scraps from the table will be millions. Millions. Happy?"
Kendall offers a deal to Hugo (Fisher Stevens), who replies, "Woof. Woof."
"Hey, hey, hey, it's the Grim Weeper, Tiny Tears!"
Mencken greets Roman after he broke down in tears at the church while attempting to eulogize his father.
"It's getting a bit Tiananmen-y out there."
Tom indicates to Shiv that protesters are massing on the streets of New York.
"You would never have dared not to come to his funeral when he was alive."
Shiv picks up Tom for his absence from Logan's funeral.
"The thing about your dad is that he's lost quite a lot of influence over the past few days."
Tom to Shiv, accurately noting that a dead Logan is not the same as an alive Logan.
"If it wasn't such a total f---ing disaster, it would be a dream come true."
Tom sums up Shiv's pregnancy to her mother.
"Listen to this, he sounds like a sow that's about to get the stun gun and knows it."
Karl (David Rasche) describes a recording of Roman weeping to Gerri (J. Smith-Cameron) and Frank (Peter Friedman).
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