The Bachelor hometown dates recap: Proceed with caution
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Four (mostly) friendly family visits, and one very frosty goodbye — this week's hometown dates episode of The Bachelor delivered the goods, rose lovers.
Let's recap!
Date No. 1: Susie
Location: Poquoson, Virginia
Family members present: Jean (mom), Tom (dad), Barbara (sister), Lauren (best friend)
Clayton meets Susie in a lovely looking park area. He already knows that she's "falling in love" with him — so will this family visit finally prompt the Bachelor to utter those words as well? Probably. (I mean, he says "I love you" a lot in the "this season on" previews.)
First thing's first, though. Susie has an agenda: "Today we're going to find out if Clayton likes being choked."
[Needle scratch sound effect] I'm sorry, what? If you're like me, rose lovers, you completely forgot that Susie is "passionate" about jujitsu — because there's been no mention of it since her introduction package. Today's date is all about the Bachelor learning how to take a beating on the mat.
ABC Breathing is overrated, Clayton.
Good job, buddy!
Before they head out to meet Susie's family, she and Clayton stop for a brief picnic at the Virginia Beach Fishing Pier. Susie says the one thing she wants in the world is to make sure her father, who is battling some health issues, to meet the man she's going to marry — and to be there to walk her down the aisle. "Bringing you home to meet him, specifically, is, like, such a big deal to me," she says. Clayton assures Susie that he wants to live up to the standard that her father set for What a Man Should Be™. (Shhh — don't anyone tell him that he has no chance.)
The Evans clan gives Clayton a warm welcome, and then Tom pulls Susie aside for a long overdue check-in. Dad says he's getting "stronger every day," and he's expecting "good results" from his upcoming MRI. Tom assures his daughter that he will absolutely be there for her on her wedding day. "I told [Clayton] today, I was like, 'My dad is like the golden standard for like, what I expect in a person and a partner and a man,'" Susie says through tears. "I think that's why I've been so tough on people in the past." She believes Clayton can live up that standard, but if he doesn't, "I know I won't stand for it." Hell yeah, Susie! Now give your pops a hug.
ABC Dads are the best.
With that, it's time for Tom to sit down with Clayton. He wants the Bachelor to know that Susie is a goddamn angel (I'm paraphrasing), and he better recognize every second of every day how special she is. "I'm surprised nobody's nabbed her yet," says dad. "You got her on the line — all you have to do is reel her in." Tom seems to genuinely like Clayton. "I felt really comfortable having you come into my house," he says warmly. "You seem like a really good guy… If Susie loves you, we'll love you." Oh my gosh, this man's love for his daughter is beyond sweet. Dang it, I thought I'd make it through at least one hometown date without crying.
Mom is a bit more reserved, and she gets right to the point: "Do you think you love Susie?" Clayton's response does not inspire a ton of confidence.
ABC Think fast, pal.
"So… I will say that I have very, very strong feelings for Susie, and to fall in love to me is, um, is very sacred, and I know that I will get there," he says. "There's a part of me that, um, is trying to make sense of it in my head with, to be honest with you, with other women around… I don't want to fall in love with, like, four people, that doesn't make sense."
No, no it does not. And yet, Clayton ends up "falling in love" with at least three people if the promos are to be believed. At least the guy knows he's ridiculous.
Barbara encourages her daughter to follow her heart while also being "cautious" — given the situation. "I came right out and asked him, 'Are you in love with Susie?' He didn't say that he's in love with you," says mom. "He said that he can see that he could get there with you."
ABC Good advice.
Wise words, mom. Susie takes her mom's words to heart but insists that it won't change how she feels about Clayton. Still, the Bachelor does not drop any version of the l-bomb before he leaves for the night.
Date No. 2: Gabby
Location: Denver, Colorado
Family members present: Julie (aunt), Rich (uncle), Kira (cousin), John (grandpa)
Man, I totally forgot Gabby was a Denver Broncos cheerleader for five years before she became a nurse. This woman is only 30 and she has lived a life, y'all.
Clayton meets her in the forest for a beautiful mountain hike. As they lace up their boots and practice bear-repelling techniques, Clayton rhapsodizes via voiceover about how Gabby is "the funniest woman alive." These two do seem to have a great time together. Gabby leads them on a hike to a vista called "Proposal Rock" (marked by a sign that I'm guessing was planted by producers). Alas, there is no ring in Clayton's backpack. But there is a random hot tub in the middle of nowhere — so that's something.
ABC A pretty view, but no proposal (yet).
As they soak in the steamy water, Gabby gives Clayton the rundown on who he'll be meeting during the family visit: Gabby's Aunt Julie and Uncle Rich, her cousin Kira, and Grandpa. Unfortunately, her father's longtime girlfriend has just been diagnosed with cancer. "So, because of COVID, he's not going to be there," explains Gabby. She's disappointed that her dad can't meet Clayton because he's the person she always turns to for advice and guidance. (Reminder: Gabby and her mother are currently estranged.)
Night falls, and it's time for Clayton to meet the Windey family. Awww dang, the look on Gabby's face when she hugs her grandpa… I'm getting weepy already.
ABC There's something in my eye.
"You've gotta be the guy, huh?" bellows Grandpa John after the hug is over. "Good luck to you, man!" I already love him very, very much.
The family chat gets off to a raucous start, as Gabby explains her "sit on your face" pillow gag from night one. Grandpa John LOVES it.
ABC Grandpa John
"Gabriela!" he scolds playfully. I am officially obsessed with him. He pulls the Bachelor aside for a chat, and his goal is to learn enough to feel comfortable that Clayton is, in fact, "good enough" for Gabby. "I don't give a damn about anything else." Grandpa John's love for Gabby shines through everything he says. "She's always been a dingbat," he tells Clayton, grinning. "A loveable dingbat." Grandpa has some wise advice for the Bachelor, too: Just because you're on a reality TV show, it doesn't mean you're required to get engaged on the producers' timetable. (I'm paraphrasing.) "You really need to get to know a person," says gramps. "I encourage you to not run into [an engagement]."
For now, Grandpa John says he likes Clayton. "Of course, it's early," he adds, "so I may change my mind about you." The Bachelor isn't sure if John is kidding — and I'm pretty sure he isn't. When it comes time for gramps to sit down with Gabby, he does not hold back sharing his true feelings:
ABC Tell us how you really feel, grandpa.
Don't worry — Grandpa John is just playing around. "Anybody that could possibly like you is obviously full of crap!" he teases, as Gabby laughs heartily. In reality, gramps says he's "excited" for Gabby and trusts her to make the right choice. "If it isn't for life, I'll be really pissed," he warns. "I'll come back and haunt you." Oh man, these two are so sweet together, I was already dissolving into a puddle — and then grandpa had to go and say this: "I don't think I could love anybody as much as I love you and my wife." Oh, and Grandpa still wears his wedding ring, even though his wife passed away.
ABC Awww....
Yep, now I'm full-on bawling. Also, Grandpa John's advice for a long-lasting marriage is pretty amazing: "You just have to keep on loving." [stifled sobs]
Okay, rose lovers: Time for a brief tangent on the art and science of reality TV promo editing. If any of you saw the preview clip of Gabby's hometown date that ABC released on Friday (embedded above), you're probably surprised at how well this visit turned out. You see, producers strategically edited the clip to make it sound like Grandpa John said, "Clayton is not good enough for Gabriela," when, in fact, he said, "What I really want to know is enough about Clayton to feel that he was good enough for Gabriela." (Fun with frankenbiting!)
They also changed the tenor of grandpa's "he's full of s---" joke by editing out Gabby's amused response and making it look like his statement made her cry. (In fact, as we now know, she was crying because she's so moved by her grandfather's continued devotion to his late wife.) So yeah, the clip ABC released was totally misleading due to crafty editing — a possibility I noted in my post on Friday. Still, it sucked me in, and I ain't mad about it. After all, the promo team was just doing its job — and reality shows aren't exactly trying to hide their blatant use of manipulation and deception. Once again, I refer you to the eligibility requirements all potential contestants must agree to:
Warner Bros. Read the fine print, kids.
Honestly, those requirements apply to viewers, too — at least when it comes to accepting that not all of the "reality" we see on this show (or any reality show) is real. End of tangent!
The preview clip also shows Gabby running out of the house crying — leading us to believe that she was super upset by her conversation with her grandpa. Instead, rose lovers, she races outside in tears because her father — who she's been missing deeply this entire time — just showed up outside to surprise her (while keeping a healthy social distance).
ABC A socially distanced hello from Gabby's dad.
Oh man, he's gone full Love, Actually! And each sign is sweeter than the last: "You are the most beautiful, intelligent, loving and caring daughter"; "Thank you for being the glue of our family"; "You deserve the very BEST" — and so on. "That was the best surprise I could ever, ever ask for," sobs Gabby. She's so happy after her father's message, Gabby has the courage to share her true feelings with Clayton: "I definitely feel like I'm falling in love with you." He LOVES it.
ABC Could Gabby be... the one?
"I might have been waiting on that a little bit," he says giddily. "I'm just so happy now. I can't stop smiling." He does look happy… but he also seems to be wildly in love with any woman who happens to be in front of him, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.
Date No. 3: Serene
Location: Oklahoma City, OK
Family members present: Sherri (mom), Roland (brother), and Melanie (best friend)
Love is like a leap of faith, rose lovers!
ABC [insert screaming noises here]
Serene meets Clayton at Riversports Adventures, where she completely schools him on the aerial obstacle course and then sends him screaming into the free-fall abyss. The poor guy is, it seems, quite afraid of heights, and he has to psych himself up quite a bit before summoning enough courage to step off the platform. (I don't blame him; free-fall anything is my nightmare.) "I'll never forget him freaking out at the top of that thing," says Serene. "I got to see him going through all of the emotions and being human. I don't want him to feel like he can't be scared in front of me — which today he showed me that he very clearly can." Savage!
After Clayton's near-death experience, Serene tells him all about who he'll be meeting that night — and notes that her dad won't be there. Her parents are divorced, but Serene doesn't elaborate as to why her father isn't coming. Never mind that — look at how handsome Roland is!
ABC Is he single? Asking for Bachelor Nation.
Okay, brother! You have my attention. Roland pulls Clayton first, and he's in full Protective Big Brother™ mode. He's impressed, though, that Serene felt comfortable enough with Clayton to tell him about losing her grandma and her cousin. "That's huge, because that's still an open wound for her for sure," says Roland. "That lets me know that she sees something special in you." Now for the all-important follow-up question: "Do you love her?" Once again, Clayton gives a less-than-reassuring answer.
ABC Seriously, dude, you had to know these questions were coming.
"I… um, to tell you the truth, I haven't told anybody that I'm in love with them," he fumbles. "I'm not there yet." Meanwhile, Serene is in another room informing her mom that she's already told Clayton she's falling in love with him. Mom is a bit taken aback.
ABC Mom's trying to hold it together.
"It's kind of surprising hearing that you can get there so fast," she says. Serene says she and Clayton have had a "spark" since they first met, and she shows mom the jar of "fireflies" he gave her as a tribute to her late cousin. Sherri hopes that Clayton appreciates how big a step it is for Serene to be so open with him, because "important emotions she really holds close to her [chest]."
Roland sits down with Serene next, and he gets a little emotional because he's so worried that she'll get hurt. "I've seen you hurt in a lot of ways," he says, wiping away tears. "Are you comfortable that he's not going to break your trust?" Serene admits that she knows there's a risk to falling for Clayton, but she's "here for it," because it just may work out. Roland wants to support her, but he's also worried her heart will be broken. (Man, is he gonna be mad when he sees the end of this episode. But I'm getting ahead of myself.)
The visit ends with Serene upping the emotional ante: "I can say that after today, I'm not, like, falling in love with you — I'm in love with you." Clayton has another "I can't stop smiling" reaction, but he doesn't seem quite as over the moon as he was with Gabby. Still, they share several smooches before saying goodbye for the night. Three down, one to go!
Date No. 4: Rachel
Location: Clermont, Florida
Family members present: Mary Anne (mom), Tony (dad), Sam and Nate (best friends)
Poor Rachel sounds pretty sick when she meets Clayton at King's Landing canoe rental. "I'm losing my voice," she rasps. "And despite how I might sound, I'm so excited to get this date started." Clayton is, too, though he's a little freaked out when Rachel tells him the area is home to alligators and bears. Oh, and some freakishly big spiders:
ABC Dear Lord, no.
I am legitimately traumatized, rose lovers. "That thing could have taken out Godzilla!" marvels Clayton. Thankfully, the next surprise isn't nearly as terrifying.
ABC Okay, whatever.
Nice work on the sign, Bachelor Interns! (It's also good news that Clayton probably doesn't know how germs work, cuz he's about to get a mouthful of laryngitis.) And then they jump in and go swimming… in the alligator-infested waters. Hard pass.
If the Bachelor doesn't get eaten by a gator or murdered by a massive spider, he'll be meeting Rachel's parents and her best friends, Sam and Nate. "I think my dad is going to be your toughest critic," says Rachel. "He has never really liked anyone I've brought home… I just want you to be prepared." Cool, cool, no pressure! The Bachelor handles the warning in stride. "I also have to earn their trust, the same way I had to earn yours," he says. "If I get a, 'You're not that bad, kid,' then we're solid."
Something tells me Tony is going to be a little slow to warm up.
OMG
The family sits down on the couch as Rachel begins regaling them with tales of her "journey" with Clayton, but papa Tony doesn't seem to be listening. "I'm scared," he mutters to his wife, and continues to shift in his seat as Rachel chatters on and on about the group date roses she's received. At one point, the poor man is so uncomfortable he has to wipe the sweat from his brow. Can someone turn on the AC? Tony looks like he's about to overheat.
Rachel skips off to chat with her bestie Nate, who is appropriately skeptical about the whole process. "How do you feel about Fantasy Suites?" he asks. "There's still other people involved. You don't want to be played." Rachel says she just has to push thoughts of the other women out of her mind. (Healthy!) In another room, Sam tells Clayton that she warned Rachel not to get her heart broken on the show, "because I don't want to deal with it. It's gonna be tough on her." Sam reminds the Bachelor that as Italians, "we're very protective" — especially Tony, who "doesn't like anybody."
Fun fact: Tony once offered to beat up one of Rachel's old boyfriends. But I'm sure this conversation will go real smooth. Dad kicks things off by asking Clayton what he knows about Rachel — specifically, her life and her dreams in the real world. The Bachelor says he "loves" how passionate Rachel is about becoming a pilot, but dad is ready for a follow-up. "If she wants to work in Europe for a year, what would that do to you guys and your relationship?" Clayton doesn't hesitate: "I'll do whatever it takes. I'll move, I'll go wherever it makes sense to go."
That's all well and good, says Tony, but there's still the matter of the three other women. Clayton does not sugarcoat it: He knows he's going to have to hurt people before he gets to the end of his "journey," and it makes him sick. Still, the Bachelor says he can "see a future" with Rachel and has imagined proposing to her — but he doesn't have a "crystal ball." Tony takes it all in and says he can't offer his blessing until he speaks to Rachel. "If she gives me a good word [about you], when I shake your hand when you leave I'll pat you on the arm," he says.
Rachel has plenty of good words to say about Clayton when she talks to Tony. "When we were in Croatia, I did tell him I was falling in love with him," she says. "And I really am." Tony's response is #chefskiss:
I love him so much.
Hearing that, Tony can't bring himself to burst his daughter's balloon. "I thought he was very nice," he says of Clayton. "I love you, baby. I'm very proud of you. I'm only afraid of you getting hurt. But if he's what you want, I'm all for it." Rachel's crying tears of happiness because her dad wasn't "mean" to Clayton, and now Tony's crying, too. Awww, hug it out, you two!
And thus, when it's time for Clayton and Rachel to leave, Tony shakes the Bachelor's hand and pats him on the arm. That's about as much as a blessing as Clayton's going to get, and he's fine with it. Rachel gushes to Clayton that she's "falling even harder" for him after the family visit, and they spend a few minutes making out on the porch before he leaves for the night.
Though all the hometown dates went well, the Bachelor now needs to face the fact that three of his "connections" have to end before he can propose — and all of the families told him how worried they were about their daughter/granddaughter/sister/cousin/niece getting her heart broken. "You almost wish the feelings weren't as strong, so it would be easier to cut ties," he muses. "It's like, break three hearts to make one happy." It's not "like" that, Clayton, it "is" that. Are you new here?
Welp, it's time to head back to Casa Bachelor. Clayton reveals to Jesse Palmer that he's "falling in love" with all of the women "in a different capacity." But now it's time to make a "tough decision." Ok ladies, please get in formation.
The final four, soon to be the final three.
Rose ceremony roll call: Susie, Gabby, and Rachel will be moving on to the Fantasy Suites round. Sadly, this means it's "journey over" for Serene, who can and will do so much better than Clayton once she gets over this heartache. You can practically see Serene shut down emotionally when Clayton brings her outside to the Bye-Bye Bench. "I just want to say sorry," he murmurs. She looks at him with a stony expression and asks why he made this decision — but what can Clayton say? He followed his heart: "I just have stronger connections." Serene gets up with a sigh and lets Clayton bring her to the Reject SUV.
Hang in there, Serene.
"It sucks, it really does," she says. "Clayton was able to break down my walls, but I gave it my all. I can feel myself closing back up. That's why I have nothing else to say to him." Until the Women Tell All, of course.
And guess what, rose lovers? We'll get both the Fantasy Suites episode and the Women Tell All next week, because ABC wants to kill me with back-to-back episodes on Monday and Tuesday. [Weeps silently over keyboard] Until then, please take a moment and answer a few important questions: Is it me, or does Clayton maaaaybe like Gabby the most? Would you want to see Serene as Bachelorette? And should Clayton shave his toes or leave his Hobbit feet alone? Post your thoughts below!
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